Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU for wanting to meet up with a man (who is a very old/longlost friend) after a month of talking?

4 replies

notgoodwithnames · 15/05/2026 12:03

We're both 31.

He was a friend I had in primary school and we'd spoken in secondary school or college as well, can't remember which.
In May, he added me on FB. He said I look really familiar, and I said "so do you!" and it turns out he's one of my oldest friends who I lost contact with.
We've been talking since the start of May daily, and having fun playing online games together. We've shared selfies and we live on the same estate. Found out he literally lives a less than 5-minute walk down the road. He doesn't know I live that close, only that I'm nearby.
Growing up I hung around almost exclusively with lads, because I relate to them better being a tomboy and all.

I'm mentally hanging around 22-23 due to a (now treated) medical condition where my brain basically didn't hit record and was in a very spaced out state for a decade. It's a long story. He has been slightly flirty and we're both single.
Told my mum I'll probably meet him up at the cinema next month, we've been discussing it. My mum kind of freaked out, saying stuff like, he might have ulterior motives, he might kill you, and then she talked about these true crime cases she loves reading about. She said I need some life skills because I'm "too trusting".

In secondary school and college I had my mum drop me off at the cinema so I could go to the cinema with these geeky lad friends and she was fine with them and didn't say this type of stuff. For more context on that he's whatever you call the type of lad/man who wears tracksuits, shiny things and caps everyday and is a bit rough round the edges but nice. When I was in secondary school almost all of my friends were in that archetype and were some of the most loyal lads I've ever known. A bit hooligan-y, but not harmful.
She tells me stuff like "world's changed since then, you can't even go into town because there's lads with machetes trying to rob you".
Am I being naive, or?

OP posts:
darksideofthetoon · 15/05/2026 12:07

Sounds like it could be fun. Just take it slowly and make sure you meet in a pubic place like a coffee shop. Also, be sure to tell your mum or close friend where you’re going.

At least initially until you feel more confident and reassured.

Have fun.

VictoriaEra · 15/05/2026 12:09

Your mum is being too over protective now. Believe me, I go into town everyday and I've never even seen anyone with a machete - let alone been robbed by one. Don't hide away. Take the steps that you want to and feel able to.

Gizlotsmum · 15/05/2026 12:13

Your mum is over reacting but it will be coming from a good place . Could you do a coffee meet first, might reassure her if she could shop nearby

notgoodwithnames · 15/05/2026 12:14

VictoriaEra · 15/05/2026 12:09

Your mum is being too over protective now. Believe me, I go into town everyday and I've never even seen anyone with a machete - let alone been robbed by one. Don't hide away. Take the steps that you want to and feel able to.

Me neither, though down the street on my estate a couple years ago there were lads with machetes apparently, and a chip shop got smashed up.

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page