To update those that commented on my husband being an asshole about my ear infection post last night…

[HealthConcerns]

Just to update you all who were so lovely last night - I was even worse overnight so called 111, they said to wait to GP appt this morning.

At the appointment GP did my vitals, checked my ear (which is now fully closed shut) and advised me to go straight to A&E to get IV antibiotics.

Still waiting as need to be assessed by ENT but they are taking great care of me. Decent pain relief, have fed me and going very regular obs. They’ve also done swabs to see what infection we are dealing with.

People moan about the NHS but honestly, I cannot fault the treatment I’ve had, even if it is taking a bit longer to be properly admitted than I thought.

I'm only surprised you waited so long to go, burst ear drums are not slight!

Honestly you may get my first ever LTB because you're literally in hospital after trying for days to get by - I think it's over said normally but jesus christ he's being a fucking jerk.

How awful. Has this made you realise his true colours?

Enemies are kinder than him.

Oh you poor thing. The only time I’ve had an ear infection as an adult I was in such excruciating pain that I sobbed down the phone to the doctor. Worse than childbirth, honest to god. I hope you get sorted soon.

Ah, doubling down rather than apologising. Classic arsehole move.

Sounds like your delightful husband is gutted that the NHS is taking you seriously and hasn't ordered you straight back home to do your wifely duty.

Was going to say the exact same thing. Rather than accepting you’re actually ill and he’s been awful to you, he’s doubling down and trying to justify his behaviour by dismissing your current reality. What a horrible man he is. Get well soon, OP.

Is he a bit thick?

When you are feeling better, you need to take a good long look at your DH and consider whether you want to stay with such a nasty selfish wanker. 💐

Exactly what I was thinking

This is not what someone who cares or loves you is supposed to do.

How are you feeling this morning op?

One of the most painful experiences of my life was an ear infection that caused my eardrum to burst. The pain is indescribable! And ear infections can also be serious - someone died of one over the first Covid lockdown iirc

Glad you're in the right place and hope you feel better soon. And think about whether H is normally like this, and if he adds anything to your life??

Your husband sounds utterly awful OP. Have a serious think about (a) if this is the man you'd want to rely on during serious illness and (b) why he thinks dinner, dishes and school runs is "your stuff" even when poorly.

Hope you feel better soon.

@HealthConcerns how are you feeling today?

Just an update, hopefully a final one.

I had 2 days in hospital on an IV drip and had an ear canal clean (painful, hideous but necessary). Am home now.

They did a scan to rule out mastoiditis, luckily it wasn’t but I had a middle ear and outer ear infection at the same.

I’ve come home with an additional weeks worth of oral antibiotics and writing on my notes that at first time of ear infection then to go straight down the oral meds route and at a stronger level to stop this happening again.

Im incredibly tired, nauseous due to all the medications and have lost half a stone in weight but I am feeling so much better.

And once again, people slate our NHS but when you are needing urgent care like I did, I’m my experience they are fabulous. Everyone encountered from consultants, GPs, nurses, caterers for the lovely food , even the lovely porters who took me down for scans etc have been so kind, professional and I’m so grateful for them all.

And as an aside from the health side of things:

came home to an immaculate house. All the laundry done, cleaning done. Even a food shop in and meals prepped for the next 3 evenings and he’s organised help with school runs the next week so I can rest if I’m off sick from work still. He apologised for “ being a twat” (his words). He got a bit of a mouthful from me, that I was really unwell, the fact that I went to hospital shows it wasn’t “just” an ear infection and was pretty serious and that he made me feel like shit by acting like he did. He said he realised all that when I called him to tell him I was being admitted etc and did apologise. Let’s see if he behaves better going forward

Thanks for the update. I’m glad you’re home and hopefully in a lot less pain. I think rest should be your priority.
Glad your husband apologised but if he ever treats you like that again I would be having some second thoughts.
Have a restful night.

Thanks op for update glad Dh saw the error of his ways and owned up to being a twat.
Hope you're A OK soon.

@HealthConcerns, I hope so too - my XH did this to me on more than one occasion (including one where I genuinely thought I would never see my DCs again because I thought I was going to die) - the difference is that my XH never apologised.

You’re right @HealthConcerns and most don’t realise how so many people would be bankrupted with US style private healthcare (like FaRage wants to do).
The NHS issues come from constant cuts over the last 16 years, and an increasing staff exodus.

Having just recovered from yet another middle and inner ear infection (my worst in decades) with one side completely blocked, no hearing and shocking pain, I really feel for you. I was praying they would let me have my ear canal cleaned out as the pressure was unbearable, but no dice so I can't imagine what a bad state you must have been in.

Its no joke having ear infections. Sending healing thoughts.

At least my DH made toast and looked concerned! So sorry to hear yours was shite.

@Petrolitisyou poor thing, I can sympathise. I’m so sorry they didn’t help you further.

These last 6 days have genuinely been some of the worst I’ve ever had pain wise. By the time I got assessed by ENT in A&E my temp was 40.3 and I was shivering and vomiting. I think they were worried about sepsis to be honest, the area around my ear was bright red and hot to the touch. It was even more painful than childbirth.

I am glad to hear you got good treatment in hospital and your husband matched his apology with some action.

Glad you’re over it OP & DH upped his game. Bad that it took that much to get him to so maybe you can use this to hold him to account a bit more in the empathy dept going forwards?
It sounded horrific what you went through pain wise etc so thanks for posting & the caution to act immediately with an outer ear infection as your exp is what it can lead to. I’d be very unbothered by one ordinarily so it’s helpful to know.