AIBU to think working from home with chickenpox child is unfair?

[Wfhsucks]

So I called work this morning as my 5 year old son has chicken pox and they advised for
me to still work (from home) I am really struggling juggling everything and I don’t think it is fair as I couldn’t take him into the office and be expected to work?

@RedRock41

she may be entitled to dependants leave but may also not be paid. Surely it’s better to wfh and be paid than not?

that said she can always speak to her manager about it to move to unpaid

Could you not have said no thanks you need to take some leave? If you do wfh in these circumstances you can't be expected to do a good job, though, so they can't really blame you.

It’s not clear what you’re expecting OP.

What did you want to happen?
they tell you just stay at home and not worry
they say you can take a day holiday/parental leave

What was your preferred solution?

This
I would have far sooner WFH than had to use annual leave to care for a sick child but it wasn’t possible in my employment. Employers are doing you a favour surely??

I think your managers are on to you.

HSE don’t recommend caring and working at the same time, during C19 we had a colleagues toddler for example chew a cable, +working from home an extension of the workplace and for H&S, insurance purposes etc not ideal. OP shouldn’t of been instructed to do so, option for unpaid leave, negotiate a day of paid A/L and/or offer to make up hours.

A poorly primary school child isn’t a distraction. Get them set up on sofa with drink and snacks and favourite tv on and they’ll probably not move.
You’ll still be expected to work but with understanding. Give and take goes a long way. If employer is flexible with things like this then most employees will reciprocate.
If you can’t wfh then you need to say. I think I usually say something like are you ok to work.

If the child is ill and sleeping a lot you could some work in between times. It sounds like they are trying to be nice knowing you probably won't be able to do as much as usual but not wanting you to have to take leave or worse unpaid leave.

If you want to say no I really can't work at all, I'll take leave, I'm sure it would be fine. Then you can fully concentrate on the sick child.

First step in grievance process is informal, OP entitled to raise (simple email suffices) that when she advised child sick she was advised to wfh which she found and is finding difficult and stressful.

What do you mean? The usual - that the rest pick up for her in the office. That is part of the reason I went freelance. I was young, before children and this was a daily occurrence - to pick up after women and men with children who have 'to attend little Sophia's play', 'take a child to a dance class', 'take them to an appointment'. They were the ones leaving on the dot, we were the ones picking up their slack.

Im confused do you want your employers to pay you for not working and looking after your sick child ?

We have no detail that says any such thing as OP has been so vague and unhelpful. It's just as likely they offered her the chance to WFH rather than pushing it and were doing so to be as flexible as possible. OP has not returned to clarify if any other options were on the the table. Including possibly unpaid leave, short-notice annual leave, paid leave for dependents.

this is what my employers always did when my kids were sick & I needed to stay home with them - before WFH was a thing.
Small company, very accommodating & family friendly & I never had to take annual leave to cover these days.

Some employers are like this & understand how much everyone benefits. I still had to do the same work on return to the office - its not like anyone else covered it while I was off.

OP - just do what you can, while looking after your child.

Well... tell them that, not us.

What would your company do if your role wasn’t viable working from home?

Im assuming your issue is if you were an office worker, you would get a perk (paid day off?) and you feel aggrieved that you’re not as you can WFH?

It really doesn’t sound like they have forced her to wfh.
I’d be very bemused to get an informal grievance if I’d been nice and offered wfh.
If an employee wants it off they tell me - x is ill I’ll need to take it as unpaid.
If they want to be allowed to wfh they usually tell me child ill and hope I offer wfh as they can’t demand it but it’s seen as a helpful solution. I do usually say something like are you ok to work from home but that’s not me advising them to wfh let alone demanding it. They are free to say they can’t work.
Obviously over time you get to know people’s preferences and set ups. One always takes it as unpaid. Another is very grateful to be able to wfh if child poorly (get impression couldn’t in previous job)

In a role where you can’t wfh then you’d need to take off unpaid or use annual leave. Most employers don’t give paid time off for caring for a sick child.

This pretty much sums up my thoughts.

Because you can.

Obviously! But to interpret is 'others will do my work by adding to their workload', the employer will not lose out, it is the mugs that are colleagues who will pick up the slack.

Children are not taken to work because they require a lot of attention all the time, which interferes with work, sick or healthy.

You need to reframe, they are being kind! Of course they know you won’t be as productive with a poorly child at home. I found when my child had it she was lethargic and just wanted to watch tv, I kept an eye on her, medicated her when needed and of course provided comfort. I wasn’t there to play with her, she needed rest to heal.

if you don’t want to, take leave, flexi if that is offered or unpaid carers leave. Your employer certainly shouldn’t be expected to be responsible to pay you for not working because your child is sick… they have given you the biggest compromise without you loosing leave.

id take that as a win

I don’t understand what you are wanting. Obviously they understand that you won’t be at full capacity and will need to spend some time dealing with your child but you try do what you can whilst they sleep/ watch tv and catch up some of it whilst they’ve gone to bed.

Whats the alternative- they make you go to the office, they make you take a days leave?

Op it is hard but you’re lucky in another way, I’ve had managers that insisted I needed to come into work when my child was really sick. I got called in and given out to when I returned to work the following day (when he wasn’t even fully better but dh was back )

I think YABU. Some people who can’t wfh would be told to take annual leave or unpaid leave in this scenario. You are lucky you have the option to wfh (I am so thankful for being able to and never ever take wfh for granted)