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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Pregnant with 3 yo - loosing energy

6 replies

JJ1992 · 10/05/2026 18:52

Ah right.

I'm quite annoyed at my partner. I'm currently 38 weeks pregnant and the last 3 days I have felt exhausted - pretty much continuously. We have a three year old and he's a very active kid. Luckily he is at nursery a couple days in the week so I am getting time to rest.

I'm finished work and my partner has been working hard all week - so come the weekend we are trying to parent together while both being very tired.
Today I have really struggled with our little boy - he has been on the go since 6AM and had been quite hyper / in our faces ( he senses something changing) we have taken him out for a walk with a little treasure hunt and then to the park this afternoon. Twice today I have found my partner dosing on the couch when he is supposed to be looking after our little boy. The second time I was in the room and just starting to dose off myself - when I realised he was sleeping i could no longer let myself sleep because I knew someone needed to be awake to watch the little one. He has mentioned to me that he also feels tired and like he's coming down with something.. he has also been very impatient with our son and I constantly have to remind him/ correct him ( eg don't tell him to shut up 😔)

I'm quietly quite angry about this- I've voiced how tired I'm feeling a few times but I'm still making an active effort to keep involved with activities and chores. I really could've done with a little bit of a nap this afternoon but it feels like he has no thought for me just suits himself.

AIBU for being mad since he also has valid reasons for being tired ?

OP posts:
xyz75 · 10/05/2026 18:54

Well if he's struggling now, god help him when the baby comes. Make sure he does his fair share of the night shifts .

Lifeisexpensive · 10/05/2026 18:57

It's not a race to the bottom. Two kids are greater than the sum of their parts, and if you are competing about how tired you are now you'll be divorced by the time your second is a year old.

If your first born is three and has toys and the room is safe then is dozing on the sofa if he's not feeling well really the end of the world? I'm not diminishing how tired you are by the way - I had a 2yo and a 4yo (exactly two years between) so I get it. But you can both be tired and feeling like shit.

JJ1992 · 10/05/2026 19:01

Lifeisexpensive · 10/05/2026 18:57

It's not a race to the bottom. Two kids are greater than the sum of their parts, and if you are competing about how tired you are now you'll be divorced by the time your second is a year old.

If your first born is three and has toys and the room is safe then is dozing on the sofa if he's not feeling well really the end of the world? I'm not diminishing how tired you are by the way - I had a 2yo and a 4yo (exactly two years between) so I get it. But you can both be tired and feeling like shit.

You're right and it does start to feel like a competition sometimes.
He's just better at speaking up for and looking after his needs than I am and then i end up envying him 😂

I don't agree with us both sleeping on the couch when we are supposed to be looking after our child though- I think that would be quite irresponsible

OP posts:
Eatally · 10/05/2026 19:03

I think now is the time to be kind to each other and both rest while you can. Can you agree to take it in turns to have a rest whilst the other watches the 3 year old?

JJ1992 · 10/05/2026 19:21

Eatally · 10/05/2026 19:03

I think now is the time to be kind to each other and both rest while you can. Can you agree to take it in turns to have a rest whilst the other watches the 3 year old?

I feel like I'm using every ounce of energy I have to be kind to my son 🤪

OP posts:
Lifeisexpensive · 10/05/2026 20:34

JJ1992 · 10/05/2026 19:01

You're right and it does start to feel like a competition sometimes.
He's just better at speaking up for and looking after his needs than I am and then i end up envying him 😂

I don't agree with us both sleeping on the couch when we are supposed to be looking after our child though- I think that would be quite irresponsible

It doesn't have to be both of you though - you can take it in turns to nap and the other one doing jobs or pottering around. Not on full supervision mode but aware and listening out. X

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