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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to be hurt by this?

31 replies

Zombieof3 · 08/05/2026 09:19

Today is my 30th birthday, I don't go overly wild with birthdays, but when its my partners or the children's I put so much effort in.

Anyway, I already told my partner not to worry about buying me anything as money is tight for us right now, but he hasn't even wished me a happy birthday. I've woken up this morning, he's already in a bad mood and literally has only referenced my birthday by saying don't expect anything you've already celebrated your birthday last week (I went out for drinks last week in advance). I wasn't expecting a massive deal, but a simple happy birthday would have been nice. The only ones who have acknowledged my birthday was my 10 year old and 8 year old. Im probably being really silly, and it is just another day but this has hurt my feelings more than it should have.

OP posts:
nomas · 08/05/2026 13:22

YANBU, he’s a knob. Please make zero effort for his birthdays. Match his effort.

ithinkilikethislittlelife · 08/05/2026 13:28

Happy birthday to you but honestly, he sounds a pig. I always read on here about the women who make such an effort for their partner and then get sod all back. It’s just so bloody rude. My children adore seeing their dad spoil me and vice versa. For your children not to see their dad spoil you makes me sad for you and them as it’s showing them he doesn’t care for you. Like I said, he’s a pig.

Inaflummox · 08/05/2026 13:38

Please get yourself a cake and have it with the children. They sound lovely.

Flowersdie · 08/05/2026 13:41

You’re not being silly. He’s being an absolute cunt. Would you behave to someone you’re meant to love like that? What about someone you like? He doesn’t love you. I’m sorry

TheJoyousHiker · 08/05/2026 13:43

Happy Birthday. At the very least, you now know to never do a thing to celebrate your DH’s birthday again, you can blank the date from your mind. Do nothing and organise nothing from your children. He sounds awful.

Flowersdie · 08/05/2026 13:48

I’m divorced. My ex gets me a card and a small present and helps my child get me a cake and decorations. And wishes me happy birthday.

Your current partner can’t even extend you the same courtesy. Your kids must be really sad and wondering where the cake etc is

happy birthday! And make this the last with that pig

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