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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Should the person who works from home do more household tasks than the one who doesn’t?

34 replies

Ramsinator · 05/05/2026 12:59

I work from home three days a week, I have an office job and go in twice a week. I work the standard 9-5

Partner works full time as a joiner, but his hours differ. Sometimes he can be home at 4, sometimes not until 7 depending on the location he’s been working that week.

How would you split household tasks? Should I be doing most as I’m home anyway and it’s easier for me to do them? What is a fair split in your opinion?

OP posts:
CoastalCalm · 05/05/2026 13:46

WFH I’d clear kitchen, load dishwasher , put stuff away and churn the laundry - The odd day I would cook but as DH is the one who insists on a ‘proper’ evening meal then he tends to cook or we batch cook and reheat. cleaner comes once a fortnight but around that I’d do little jobs , clean the loos etc

5128gap · 05/05/2026 13:47

I think you should strive for roughly equal amounts of free time. So I think its reasonable if you gain an hour or so through not having to commute, for example that your partner doesn't, then you could use the time for extra domestics. I don't think you should do extra simply because you're at home, cleaning in your lunch hour for example, when if you were in the office you'd be taking a break.

redskyAtNigh · 05/05/2026 13:50

WhatAMarvelousTune · 05/05/2026 13:41

I don’t know anyone who thinks laundry takes hours and hours a week. Do these people wash everything by hand?

All the people who start MN threads complaining how they spend virtually all their time sorting the washing.

(No, I don't understand it either).

Rachelshair · 05/05/2026 13:51

You're working the same hours, so should be doing about the same overall.
If you want to spend all your breaks and your saved time from not commuting to do all the household jobs on your wfh days, then that would be ok but only if you are happy to do so. You could wear yourself out though, being non stop on those days. It depends how intensive your job is. If you can have a quick break whenever you want, then it might be quite easy to do put the laundry on while you make a drink. If you're non stop on calls all day that won't be possible.
You may prefer to do something for yourself in your breaks though, they are supposed to be breaks after all, and that would also be fine.
If your H finishes early then he should be doing some household jobs anyway. If he finishes late then you'd do more on those days presumably. If he's really tired (physical job) then maybe his jobs only get done on a day off.

RoseField1 · 05/05/2026 13:52

redskyAtNigh · 05/05/2026 13:40

I always find it amazing how laundry takes hours and hours of the week for some people, but is also a quick job that can easily be fitted around wfh.

It depends how you do it doesn't it? Some people sort into colours, iron, fold and put away and see that as part of the job. I chuck everything in together, and when dry I make piles of crumpled clean clothes and dump them on people's beds to put away or not as they see fit. It doesn't take me long, but my standards are low.

Ponderingwindow · 05/05/2026 14:27

I can move laundry along during the work day if I am using the dryer, but that is about it. If I am hanging clothing that has to wait until the end of the day.

You should end up with equal amounts of leisure time. So if not having a commute saves you time, then you can pick up some extra chores. Otherwise, wfh shouldn’t really change the division of labor.

SethBrogan · 05/05/2026 14:35

I wouldn’t factor in working hours but I would factor in the commute. So if you both finish at 5 but it takes the other person an hour to get home then the person WFH could spend that hour doing some chores.

HoskinsChoice · 05/05/2026 23:41

It's not about who works where, it's about who is free. So, if you work from home until 5pm but he works in an office but is home by 4, I'd expect him to do more as you're working longer hours.

If you're working from home, you are working, not running the hoover around.

Eenameenadeeka · 06/05/2026 00:59

I think you should both do what you can, without spending your actual work time doing housework. Assuming as a joiner he starts quite early? Most that I know would start at 6 or 7 the very latest, so you have more time in the morning?
If he's back at 4, he can do some then. If he's not back till 7, you can. Doesn't need to be fixed rigid rules, just both do what you can when you can.

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