22:30 work call - completely unacceptable?

[shortbreadconsumer]

I received a work call from someone in my organisation at 22:30 last night. I answered, thinking it was an emergency. The colleague was completely hysterical and impossible to understand. In the end I had no choice but to end the call with 'we can discuss this in the morning.'

This morning I spoke to the persons line manager about it, who said that it was 'unfortunate, but not unreasonable' for this individual to have called me as I had not answered any emails from said colleague over the weekend. They had sent me over 50 emails this weekend. I did not see the emails as seniors within the organisation take an 'if it's urgent, they have my number' approach.

I am more senior than both of of these colleagues and I was 'on call' all weekend as the most senior point of contact in the organisation. However, this was not an issue that required weekend working and, more importantly, it was not an issue that I needed to be consulted on. It was very simple and should have easily been resolved in working hours by this individual alone - her direct line manager would not have needed to input either.

AIBU to think that this was unprofessional and unacceptable from both of them?After no sleep, I've reached that 'was it really that bad' point where I am so sleep deprived that I am not sure whether I am overreacting in my annoyance or not!

I try hard daily this is why its not a daily occurrence but some days it doesn't matter how many skills you have learnt they just won't work. People don't fake being ill they fake being well. And I can fake it a lot but there will definitely times I can't and this is the exact scenario I wouldn't be able to cope with.

I think you're being unfairly disparaging about other people's stress levels, especially since you were apparently so stressed at having to take a phone call when you were on call that you then couldn't sleep.

Theres zero evidence the employee is actually mentally ill. You are projecting.

If they are, thats not an excuse for their conduct (mitigation yes).

Op isnt the employees boss

I really really doubt the same posters suggesting people with MH problems so severe and concerning they think serious harassment over unanswered comms is absolutely fine should be in work are actually on this thread too saying what you are accusing them of.

But the employee is showing symptoms of a serious anxiety disorder thats the exact people thay people on this site think should just pull themselves together and get a job

Having had to be on call when I worked as a housing officer, I can say that if I had a call later at night or if I'd actually been woken from sleep, then it took me ages to settle down. I think adrenaline kicks in, and it takes ages to be calm.
On another point, I agree being on call is totally misunderstood by lots of people. I remember being called numerous times at ungodly hours, including by the police, and being told that I sounded sleepy. I told them plainly that I had done my days work, was at home with DH and children and at 2am it's not surprising that I was sleepy because oddly enough, I was asleep when the call came through. They thought I was sitting in an office doing shifts.

Honestly, no, I don't actually want to work with colleagues who are seriously mentally unwell. I am not a mental health nurse. I am an extremely supportive manager who bends over backwards to support staff and promote wellbeing etc, but some people are simply not fit to be in the workplace, and it would be much better for them and those around them if they were not in work.

Managing staff with serious mental illness has probably been the most stressful thing I've had to do at different points in my career, and dealing with these very unwell individuals has on several occasions had a significant negative impact on my own wellbeing. I've seen the same pattern in managers who I've line managed when they have had to deal with very unwell people on their teams.

I'm very much in favour of creating inclusive, supportive working environments in which people have the psychological safety to talk without judgement about their mental health and where reasonable adjustments are made to accommodate people's needs to enable them to stay in work etc. But sometimes, people are just not well enough, and when their illness starts to have a seriously negative impact on the wellbeing of those around them, then I think it would be better for everyone if they took a break from work and just focused on getting better. Personally, I have no issue with the benefits system supporting such individuals, that's what it's for.

Sending 50 emails and ranting isnt exclusive to having an anxiety disorder.

In any case, the employee has a job. You're the one saying you'd have (and have done) turned up at op's home, it is very fair for people to say they wouldnt want to work with someone who cannot see that is not ok behaviour.

This

And ignoring someone isn't ok behaviour either

I think thats very fair statement and just to add you sound like a great manager

But reading and dealing with the emails wasn't the OPs job, and this was not a staff member of hers - how would reading them have been useful?

For goodness sake! The system at this place of work is that the OP isn't contacted direct. The employee should have contacted a junior staff member who would have escalated to the OP if necessary . The OP isn't expected to monitor emails because any urgent business she has to deal with is communicated to her by phone.
Again, that might not be the system you are used to, but it is here.

Op didnt ignore the emails, op doesnt check emails as part of being on call. The employee didnt follow the simple instructions provided a few days earlier.

Ops behaviour was absolutely fine, to the point if this landed on my desk as a grievance against op to investigate as an impartial manager, Id be delighted as it would take about 20 minutes in total to complete as soon as I saw the email re who was on call and the process.

and di you keep your job?

Okay, having read your updates I think YANBU, and this colleague needs serious support.

The key thing, to me, is that this person was not supposed to be working at all. Therefore, the normal level of sympathy I might feel for a junior level person panicking because they couldn't find the answer to something, with nobody else to ask (and to be clear, even in those circumstances sending FIFTY emails and incoherent crying would not be justified) doesn't apply.

She didn't need to send one email, she didn't need to contact the junior on call person (who should have been the appropriate first point of call), she didn't need to ring anyone. The task didn't need doing. She could have just waited and done it Monday morning. So yeah, she acted completely inappropriately and even if that's because there's more going on, that's not your problem to deal with (as you've specified you aren't in her immediate management chain).

As a senior staff member I might take this as a bit of a red flag to check out exactly what's going on in the lower levels of your organisation though - is this literally just one person who is really struggling (and if so is this a recent thing which could indicate lack of management support, or has she always been like this, which could be a HR issue), or are your entry level staff generally not getting the same message senior staff are giving about working hours and workloads?

God give me strength! My partner and colleagues have to be on an on call rota because if IT networks go down it causes major issues for the hospitals he works for, you can't do scans, x rays, blood testing etc in A&E if there's no network! I worked for many years in the railway infrastructure and managers there had on call rotas because shit goes wrong on railway lines! Think about it!

I’m so glad I don’t work with a lot of people on this thread. When I’m on call it’s for a week and it’s all non-working hours. If I was expected to check my emails and reply to them every hour and answer any and all queries from staff it would be me sobbing incoherently down a phone to someone. Honestly if you think on call means on tap 24/7 please don’t ever contact your person unless something is literally on fire!

YABVVU
So your mindset is "I don't open my emails when I am on call as they have my number" which in itself is very poor, and when someone calls you, you make no effort trying to understand what the issue is, or reassure them if indeed it can be dealt with the next day. You wouldn't last long in my industry/department/team with such an attitude (technically I am on call 24/24 and 7/7, and have had to work many wkds, BHs and holidays - frustrating when it happens but it is part of many jobs).

It's literally not her job. The emails are someone else's specific responsibility.

Anyone else on call would surely check their work emails even if once over the 3 days of a bhw

I get it’s not part of the role - but it’s so easy to check emails it seems weird that Someone on call didn’t once

so the blame is going to go on the colleague who didn’t contact the junior

and as the junior wasn’t contacted via email or phone call thru couldn’t then call op

is that right ?

there was a post a week or two ago about a poster whose appointment for something was changed I think and emailed to be told this - which they didn’t get

the poster didn’t check their emails and was told by most of mn that they should check emails even once a day

I se this similar - even more so as its work and she was on call

I can see this being like friends

we were on a break

you were on call

Absolutely, my partner didn't for years!!

People i work with know not to ignore me. When I said I've turned up at peoples doors who ignored me im talking about friends, family, partners. But I would absolutely do this to a colleague if I was feeling that distressed and they ignored me. Its such a horrible thing to do to a person. What people need to realise is this felt like an emergency to this employee. Imagine what you would class as an emergency in your head like your kids in hospital dying and needs a kidney but your not a match but their dad is and he's not answering his phone I guarantee you would become obsessed ringing constantly and tracking him down until he responds. People who are mentally ill can often misinterprete things as emergencies. Its catastrophizing there reaction is actually normal but the circumstances are twisted if that makes sense. I know what I mean but I'm not explaining it well

I can't work out why she sent fifty emails without ever once thinking to check it was the correct email address for the out of hours emergency contact.

And to all the PP thinking OP was a meanie for only talking to the woman for forty-five minutes - I like to think that I would have just said 'I am not the out of hours contact. Please contact Person A.' But I probably would not have been quick-witted enough, and would likewise have been lumbered with a long idiot-soothing session and disturbed sleep.

Well it seems like it was inappropriate work wise but clearly something else is amiss here. Do you not have some responsibility being oh so senior or even some basic humanity?
I am the most senior person in my small business. Many years ago a relatively junior member of my staff arrived at my house on Xmas eve in a hysterical state. I didn't send her away. I made her a cup of tea and let her talk for half an hour until she calmed down.

Almost 20 years later she is a senior valued very loyal member of staff.
Sometime "being senior" involves more than just dealing with "work stuff".

Not sure what you want here, you’ve asked people if you’re unreasonable and when they suggest that you are you are really defensive about it.

You clearly don’t think you’re in the wrong so end of no?