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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU not to provide a fake UK address for my friend?

76 replies

Bobbytwoshoes · 04/05/2026 11:59

A friend of mine lived in the UK for many years, and has a job in the UK that allows her to work remotely. A couple of years ago she moved abroad (to an EU country), but has not told her employer this (as they would not be able to continue to employ her due to employment laws etc). She gave them a UK address that a friend of hers lived at, but now this friend is leaving and she’s asked if she can put my address instead.
I don’t feel comfortable with this as I don’t know the legal implications of this for me (obviously she is breaking the law, but that’s her decision) - she says it’s just her employer that would have this address, but presumably it’s also her bank and HMRC? It feels like this is a risky thing for me to do from a legal (and moral!) perspective.

Yes you are being unreasonable - you should help your friend out.

No you are not being unreasonable, it’s illegal, she shouldn’t be doing it, and you could get into trouble for helping her.

OP posts:
loislovesstewie · 04/05/2026 13:03

I would definitely not do this. It's just untruthful and I can see all sorts of problems arising from it. If you get any post addressed to her send it back as not known at this address. I would not put it past her to just do it.

honeylulu · 04/05/2026 13:04

Absolutely not. When we (law firm) were WFH during lockdown a couple of people went back to their home country to be with their families rather than living alone in London. It was identified very quickly from where they were logged in and they were told to come back pronto.

We've since merged with a global firm and there is more flexibility but there are still limits and it has to be requested and agreed. I'm amazed she's got away with it so far.

Miyagi99 · 04/05/2026 13:24

HellsBells13 · 04/05/2026 12:04

I work for an American company in the UK which forbids me working overseas . I am surprised her company does not have their IT team to detect her IP address as ours would and do not allow VPN use either.

We have to use VPN in our work to be able to work remotely but we use our own phones so you can see if anyone is working abroad.

PullTheBricksDown · 04/05/2026 13:32

Bobbytwoshoes · 04/05/2026 12:11

Thanks for the helpful messages that have helped me to feel less guilty for saying no. To answer some questions, I own my house and we are multiple occupants so no implications there with a extra person being registered, and she doesn’t have any family in the UK hence why she is asking me.
But I agree it’s really dodgy both morally and legally, and I just don’t want to get involved. Think I will just be honest and say I don’t feel comfortable with it.

ETA she works for an NGO / charity

Edited

I'd tell her that someone in your multiple occupation house has attracted extra scrutiny for tax reasons and the Inland Revenue is involved so you can't do this. Make her think it'll be bad for her as well as you.

7238SM · 04/05/2026 13:32

In no way would I allow her to use my home address for her fraud! Its CF territory to even ask you.

No UK family- not your problem
She can find another gullible person or pay for a PO box- although I doubt a PO box would be allowed, again, not your problem.

Besidemyselfwithworry · 04/05/2026 13:34

Bobbytwoshoes · 04/05/2026 12:18

Gosh I hope not!

Id be tempted to report her anonymously before this even has chance to occur.

Shrinkhole · 04/05/2026 13:36

It could go so horribly wrong if she is, for instance, in debt and being linked to your address affects your credit score or ends up with bailiffs calling you or she could commit a crime and the police come to your address.

If she’s prepared to lie and cheat to her employer then she could do similar to you so any promises she makes are not worth the paper they’re written on as you already know she’s a liar.

Hold strong and do not agree to this. She can get a legitimate PO Box address, there are businesses where you can register a postal address for a fee. My husband has one for his company as we wanted it separate from our home address (the business is nothing dodgy BTW!) He just has his post sent there and they bin the junk mail and call him to collect anything important occasionally and answer phone calls for him and pass on a message. Most of what he does is online so he has minimal need of a landline or postal address and this meets his needs perfectly

Thechaseison71 · 04/05/2026 13:36

Lulumush · 04/05/2026 12:04

This is tax evasion which is a criminal offence. She is also creating a permanent establishment for her employer overseas making them liable for local taxes.
She will be fired for gross misconduct if they find out. I would advise against helping her.

How's it tax evasion?? Id assume the employer is paying the tax out of her wages

Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain · 04/05/2026 13:47

honeylulu · 04/05/2026 13:04

Absolutely not. When we (law firm) were WFH during lockdown a couple of people went back to their home country to be with their families rather than living alone in London. It was identified very quickly from where they were logged in and they were told to come back pronto.

We've since merged with a global firm and there is more flexibility but there are still limits and it has to be requested and agreed. I'm amazed she's got away with it so far.

Yep similar with government legal dept but as it was government they were a bit more lenient.

Friendlygingercat · 04/05/2026 13:51

There are dozens of "virtual office" services who will forward your mail on to you abroad, including packages. They will even open and scan your mail for you for a fee. She should subscribe to something like this. I use one in the USA which gives me a valid US address for correspondance and anything I buy over there. These services are not difficult to find and are tax deductable if you are self employed.

Thefastandthecurious5 · 04/05/2026 14:01

mindutopia · 04/05/2026 12:24

You don’t have to give a fake address. Just tell her no! If she uses your address anyway, well, I’d report her. If she doesn’t already know your address, just tell her to bugger off.

This is what I’d do. I’d tell her in writing that you’re not comfortable with her using your address. Hopefully she won’t then use your address without you knowing, but if she does, you have it in writing that you didn’t give her permission.

Afnfnfnd · 04/05/2026 14:03

Is she a legal resident in that EU country?

MarieTheresevonWerdenberg · 04/05/2026 14:17

Thechaseison71 · 04/05/2026 13:36

How's it tax evasion?? Id assume the employer is paying the tax out of her wages

But she is evading tax in the country where she is currently residing.

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 04/05/2026 14:19

It’s fraud i definitely wouldn’t get involved. You’d lose your single person council tax for a start.

outerspacepotato · 04/05/2026 14:19

She's not your friend.

And you're going to have to make sure she's not using it without your permission.

Thechaseison71 · 04/05/2026 14:32

MarieTheresevonWerdenberg · 04/05/2026 14:17

But she is evading tax in the country where she is currently residing.

Depends on the country. Many you pay either / or not get taxed twice.

mumofoneAloneandwell · 04/05/2026 14:36

I would say no, but i can see why she asked as it isnt as big a deal as I thought from the thread title

Still, you just dont need the stress and anxiety

It shouldn't ruin your friendship by politely declining

essentialwaitrosesmokedham · 04/05/2026 15:24

YABU it's no big deal. I'd do it for my friend

Bobbytwoshoes · 04/05/2026 15:41

Thank you all for your advice, I’ve messaged and said I just don’t feel comfortable with it and explained why, and asked if she can find someone else or set up the PO Box thing that some of you suggested. She’s replied saying that’s fine so hopefully that is the end of it. Really interesting to hear that for so many of you your employers keep tabs on VPNs etc to stop this kind of thing, I think the charitable sector is way behind on this kind of stuff, in my job (also NGO) they won’t even use Teams / Slack as it’s considered “too faffy” 😂.

OP posts:
Nautiesdese · 04/05/2026 16:02

Keep an eye that she doesn't your address anyway!

Lulumush · 04/05/2026 16:03

Thechaseison71 · 04/05/2026 13:36

How's it tax evasion?? Id assume the employer is paying the tax out of her wages

@Thechaseison71she is liable for double taxation if she is resident overseas (likely) as well as likely paying incorrect tax in UK. She should filing local tax returns if she is tax resident there.
As an aside she could be breaching immigration laws by working overseas without a visa plus breaching GDPR.

The bigger issue is PE creation. Her employer could be liable for overseas taxes without knowing as a result of her actions. This is a major issue and would definitely result in immediate dismissal as she is likely in breach of her employment contract.
Mad.

Nautiesdese · 04/05/2026 16:03

*use your address

JHound · 04/05/2026 16:04

Say no.

HelenaWilson · 04/05/2026 16:07

There are dozens of "virtual office" services who will forward your mail on to you abroad

If the employer is paying attention, won't they twig that it isn't a residential address? And I bet HMRC are fully aware of these services.

Nearly50omg · 04/05/2026 16:43

Thechaseison71 · 04/05/2026 14:32

Depends on the country. Many you pay either / or not get taxed twice.

You pay tax in the country you live in. Some countries like USA yes you’ll be charged tax for USA and wherever you’re living but that’s the risk you take

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