WWYD?

[poetryandwine]

This happened about a month ago and I still wonder if I should have spoken up. I would appreciate MumsNetters’ views.

I was in a window seat on a long haul BA flight, second row back. Our section had a 2-4-2 seating configuration. Next to me was a young teenage boy. His mum and siblings were across the aisle. Directly ahead of us was a couple with an infant.

I prefer to check a bag and carry my in-flight supplies in a tote stored under my seat, so I did not pay attention to our overhead locker. When the family boarded, it was full, including some baby supplies. The locker above the couple in front was empty.

The big family had quite a lot of stuff. They filled the locker in the middle section and put some small items under their seats. Then the mum went to put a couple of things in the empty locker above the couple. Who got very angry.

The issue seemed to be that they didn’t want to risk any items in a bin over the head of their PFB. Mum offered to reconfigure so only light items would be in this locker. But no, it was their locker and it was staying empty.

There may have been a class or ethnic prejudice in the mix.

I did nothing and still regret it. I think I should have called a flight attendant. What would you have done?

TIA

What was the outcome? I don't think I would have intervened, none of my business, but obviously the couple with the baby were in the wrong.

The bigger family had to put their overhead stuff wherever they could, around the plane. In the next cabin, I guess.

I would have done absolutely nothing and just minded my own business.

I wouldn't have done anything - why do you think it was any of your business?

Not my business to get involved in. Let them sort it out and call for help from attendants if needed themselves.

Unless the family were obviously vulnerable or incapacitated in some way I'd have minded my business. People of colour/immigrants/lower income people are able to advocate for themselves and don't need you policing their interactions with gobshites on a plane. Move on OP! I doubt they're sitting around thinking about it today.

Are genuinely still thinking about this non event?

I did nothing and still regret it. I think I should have called a flight attendant. What would you have done?

I would have assumed that literally no-one needed me to call a flight attendant, given that they could call them themselves?

She could have called for assistance. It's the job of staff to deal with issues. It's a shame she probably felt intimidated and your instinct was to help, which is kind.

Let it go now.

I wouldn't have done anything, both parties were capable of calling a flight attendant if they wanted to.

I’d have been tempted (if it went on for a while) to offer the family MY space in the overhead above me … oh it’s full, what is all this? Baby stuff? I wonder whose it is? They’ll have to move it to their own overhead.
If the y refused/denied it was theirs, explicitly call the flight attendant to mediate.

Thank you.

You and a couple of others are getting to what I was thinking.

The man was acting intimidating and it did seem the mum was unable to act on her own behalf. This is what has kept me wondering.

Should have said, this is what I’d have been tempted to do, but it’s highly likely I’d have sat quietly not making a fuss, and just had it going around my head for ages afterwards.
I can be very intimidating too in the right circumstances. But stuck in close proximity for a long flight, not sure I’d have raised my voice.
Please don’t judge yourself x

I don't know really. I wouldn't travel LH with a baby nor would I bring so much luggage it took up double the overhead locker space it should do.

I would be annoyed there was a squabble going on but I'd ignore it.

To help make sense of my reaction, the father of the PFB was definitely playing the class card the way he was talking down to the mum. I am not British and I’ve studied this a bit: I think he was probably a recent arrival to the MC himself. I have a foreign accent, but I can use a large spoken vocabulary with ease and had I spoken up (not my plan) I possibly could have got the better of him.

I find the particular dynamic I’ve outlined infuriating. I don’t know how much it is really to do with the class system, as I don’t associate this behaviour with the true UC and UMC people I know. But I feel I’ve seen less of it in less class-conscious countries.

Fuck, you really are overthinking all this, aren't you? 🤣🤣

I imagine none of the other people involved can even remember this non-event a whole month later.

What are you on about? You're making massive assumptions and judgements yourself. "Recent arrival to the middle class" "I could probably have got the better of him"! This is an insane way of thinking about a complete non-event that had nothing to do with you, a month ago!

I disagree, its an interesting observation of human behaviour.

I am spending an ever expanding part of today in a (British) airport. There is a lot of bad behaviour personal here, though none of it is affecting me. So the episode came back with more intensity.

The couple in front of you were appallingly entitled. Unjustifiably so. That would have made me quite angry!

I probably would have had a sympathetic word with the mother & suggested she call a member of the cabin staff. If I were feeling very generous (not often on an economy class flight!) I may have tried to discreetly talk to a member of the cabin staff myself.

Although there's a lesson to people travelling - try to bring as little stuff on board as possible. I board with only a backpack I can put under the seat in front of me and check the rest. It's very liberating.

Some people have a laboured way of speaking that frequently correlates with this status. Also, dress sense tells stories.

It is interesting to an outsider.

I find the particular dynamic I’ve outlined infuriating. I don’t know how much it is really to do with the class system, as I don’t associate this behaviour with the true UC and UMC people I know. But I feel I’ve seen less of it in less class-conscious countries.

As a paid-up & sometimes snobbish UMC person (born & bred for generations!), this sounds like a very jumped-up new money sort of person. Proper mannerly UMC people don't behave like this; new money do.

Although why weren't the rude entitled family in Business class if they want a whole locker? On my recent trips, "my" overhead locker was still swimming in space after I put my backpack up, and my shoes, and my coat and my handbag and my duty-free - I like everything out of the way when I change my seat to a bed.

Although I'm flying RyanAir for work later this week. Wish me luck

I do wish you luck! I hope you don’t need it.

If it matters, this was BA Premium Economy. (I needed to sleep! So it seemed well worth being reimbursed only for the Economy fare. Fingers crossed that I will get no more than a warning for putting such a claim through. The old adage about how it is better to ask forgiveness than to seek permission is very much in mind)

In many ways they were both in the wrong. The family for expecting to hog far too much overhead space. What would they have done if that space had been taken up ?
And the parents with the infant for assuming they could decide what, or who puts stuff into an overhead locker.

Too many people bring far too much for overhead locker space.

Nothing to do with a class system either. You can get very appalling behaviours from all classes. And very good ones.