My 24-year-old son is currently on the dole, and it’s become a constant point of tension within the family. My parents and siblings sometimes make me feel like I’m a bad parent because of his situation, even though I’ve genuinely tried for years to help him move forward. I’ve encouraged him repeatedly, had many conversations about work, offered him a job at my own workplace, and even gone with him to job centre appointments to try and support the process. They’ve done what they can, but ultimately it’s been on him to engage, and despite all of that I’ve been trying for years to get him to change. At home, it affects daily life. I work and have responsibilities, and there are times when he’s still in bed well into the day, sometimes around noon. When my parents and siblings come over, they often comment on it, asking why he’s still in bed or making remarks about his routine, which puts me in an awkward position. At the same time, he is 24, not a teenager, so I do recognise that responsibility sits with him too and I can’t make his decisions for him. I’ve done what I can over the years to support him, but it’s still difficult when others judge the situation and don’t see the effort that’s gone into trying to help him move forward. The builder comments on it to as we are having an extension built on the house hes asked if my son works and ive told my son it's bad but theres not much more I can do, I work early mornings 7 days a week myself.