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to be a bit pissed off at the optometrist???

9 replies

tiredemma · 20/06/2008 18:08

DS2 has recently been diagnosed with astigmatism in his left eye. His vision from his left eye is massively reduced and as such he has been prescribed some glasses.

This was all 6 weeks ago- so today we go back for a check up to see if the glasses appear to be helping.

Optometrist was negative from the word go-
" Of course, you do know that he will never be able to join the Army, or RAF, or Navy, Or Police..... ( or any job it would seem that would require perfect vision)- I had not even thought about this, bearing in mind he is only 4.

"We really need to be able to get him to see from the left eye to a Driving Standard- if he loses his other eye for example- he wouldnt be able to get a driving licence with his left eye vision" ( again- not on my mind at all)

"He will need a patch, which he will have to wear approx 6 hours a day- the problem with this is he may not be able to really see the board at school, or his books properly for a few weeks so may struggle academically"

I feel exasperated at all this. She has made me feel shit about DS and problems he may face- ones which, in the grand scheme of things- are not the be all and end all.

Why so negative???-

I just sat there like a fool and the only thing that I could think to say was " he is really into dolls at the moment so cant see him wanting to join the forces"
She must have thought I was mad.

OP posts:
RubyRioja · 20/06/2008 18:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

theSuburbanDryad · 20/06/2008 18:20

Was she discussing this in front of ds? We had a little girl of a similar age in today, and the optom had to refer her to hospital for a dilation. She sent the little girl out to choose some frames with me and had a brief chat with her parents - nothing negative, just what they can expect when they go to hospital - while i was with the girl.

YANBU for being upset - it was very negative, but she may have just been trying to prepare you for the worst. It's not the way i would have phrased it, but then I'm not an optom. Perhaps she was trying to make it clear how important it was for ds to wear his specs?

Was your ds bothered by it at all?

Miaou · 20/06/2008 18:21

Hmm, maybe it was the delivery?

Dd1 had the same outcome, different problem (squint that although almost corrected has left her with no useable vision in her right eye). I was told all the same things, plus to advise her never to go bungee jumping - but it was all handled so sensitively. I was not made to feel bad about her problems (which were down to the fact that I didn't notice her squint for ages then didn't do anything about it for a year because I thought they went away on their own )

I do think the optometrist was right to point these things out. Better to be aware of them now than have a nasty shock later on. My cousin had no idea how bad her eyesight was until she tried to learn to drive and was turned down - she is now actually registered partially sighted!

Ruby is right - choose another optometrist who is more understanding. But I still think it is right to tell you these things now. I'm glad I knew when dd was four, particularly as the forces are something she is very keen on (and fwiw, I was told it was only the airforce who wouldn't accept her, police and other services should be ok!)

tiredemma · 20/06/2008 18:22

it was in front of DS- It just went over his head, he isnt bothered at all.

I know that he will have issues with his eyesight for the rest of his life, she was just so 'matter of fact' about it, which is why I feel so pissed off about it- there was no sensitivity at all.

OP posts:
CoteDAzur · 20/06/2008 18:42

What an idiot.

I have astigmatism in my right eye, plus near-sightedness in both eyes. So what? I've been wearing contact lenses since the age of 8, and my life has not be affected at all by this.

TheHedgeWitch · 20/06/2008 18:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

chipmonkey · 20/06/2008 19:04

The wearing of the patch is not to reshape the cornea, it is to cover the other eye so that the astigmatic eye, with the help of glasses, can re-establish a good connection with the brain. The idea is not to get the astigmatism to go away but to get the maximum possible vision with the "lazy" eye
Sorry your optom seemed so negative, Emma. A lot of optoms feel the need to paint the "worst case scenario" so that no-one could say you weren't warned but at 4 it seems more likely to me that you should see a good improvement in vision with patching, I have even had success with 14 year olds who have been previously told they were beyond help as they were too old.
And personally, I'd be delighted not to have any of my boys in the armed forces, too much of a worry!

theSuburbanDryad · 20/06/2008 19:04

emma - i do think that the optom could've been more sensitive about it, there was no need to go on about it really. Unless she was trying to make sure you got ds to wear his specs??

Is it worth asking to see another optom next time?

chipmonkey · 20/06/2008 19:08

The problem is not so much with astigmatism per se, it is when you have no astigmatism in one eye and a lot of astigmatism in the other that problems arise, as the brain favours the "good" eye. We see with our brains, not our eyes, our eyes are just tools.

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