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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To wonder how people who homeschool acquire the knowledge to do so?

218 replies

Homeschooll · 29/04/2026 21:02

Just as the title really. I don’t have strong feelings on homeschooling, I don’t think it would be my choice mainly as I have little patience and I don’t feel I know enough about science or maths.

If you do it how do you know what you’re doing is right? What about the pastoral side? How do you make sure there’s a routine?

Just interested really. I’ve found more and more people are doing it.

OP posts:
kscarpetta · 03/05/2026 11:55

Watercooler · 03/05/2026 11:50

I couldn't do it. All the subjects have changed. We did the Tudors and Stuart's at dc's age but DC is doing some Iranian history topic this term. So presumably we would have to stay a year ahead of them in all subjects and understand the pedagogy of how to get those points across well. I guess that means one of us quitting work since we both with full time. And that would mean they lose out on holidays and extra curriculars. I assume that if not forced by SEN issues then most home educators are quite privileged on that front.

That said I have never assumed that school would provide them with everything they need. I think a lot of parents consider education a 'service' and blame the school when their child can't spell rather than thinking maybe they should have spent some time cementing the school knowledge at home.

If your DC would rather learn about the Tudors, or any other time or place, you could just do that 😂

Leftrightmiddle · 03/05/2026 12:10

Watercooler · 03/05/2026 11:50

I couldn't do it. All the subjects have changed. We did the Tudors and Stuart's at dc's age but DC is doing some Iranian history topic this term. So presumably we would have to stay a year ahead of them in all subjects and understand the pedagogy of how to get those points across well. I guess that means one of us quitting work since we both with full time. And that would mean they lose out on holidays and extra curriculars. I assume that if not forced by SEN issues then most home educators are quite privileged on that front.

That said I have never assumed that school would provide them with everything they need. I think a lot of parents consider education a 'service' and blame the school when their child can't spell rather than thinking maybe they should have spent some time cementing the school knowledge at home.

Iranian history isn't part of NC. So won't come up on exam spec.
Could be interesting to learn about but that's the same for all manor of history - much of which won't be covered in school

Watercooler · 03/05/2026 12:14

Maybe they're doing it in English? I don't know. Which is why I definitely shouldnt be teaching! And I don't think my 90s frame of what is the right subjects is a good route to take either. Fair play to people who have the time and resources to do it and do it well.

I think the hardest bit must be not pushing them into what you enjoy or want to do and not expressing rolling eyed cynicism over subjects I hate.

Leftrightmiddle · 03/05/2026 12:20

Watercooler · 03/05/2026 12:14

Maybe they're doing it in English? I don't know. Which is why I definitely shouldnt be teaching! And I don't think my 90s frame of what is the right subjects is a good route to take either. Fair play to people who have the time and resources to do it and do it well.

I think the hardest bit must be not pushing them into what you enjoy or want to do and not expressing rolling eyed cynicism over subjects I hate.

They may be doing that topic for any number of reasons. The point I was making was they don't have to - a different school may achieve the same by French History or the history of space travel or history of footwear.
Different topics will be attempted to get pupils engaged better
Home Ed just has even more freedom to tailor the work to achieve better engagement and interest.
While some pupils in your child's school may have liked Iranian history other may have really struggled with the topic because it's 30 different pupils with 30 different needs compared to individual curriculum for home education

kscarpetta · 03/05/2026 12:34

Leftrightmiddle · 03/05/2026 12:20

They may be doing that topic for any number of reasons. The point I was making was they don't have to - a different school may achieve the same by French History or the history of space travel or history of footwear.
Different topics will be attempted to get pupils engaged better
Home Ed just has even more freedom to tailor the work to achieve better engagement and interest.
While some pupils in your child's school may have liked Iranian history other may have really struggled with the topic because it's 30 different pupils with 30 different needs compared to individual curriculum for home education

Exactly this.
One of my kids was obsessed with the musical Six, so we ended up learning loads about Henry VIII, his wives, the Tudors etc.
In doing that, we did memorise some 'pub quiz' type historical facts of course, but really what they learned was about literacy, evaluating sources, change over time, creativity, morality, power, even sex education. We visited the theatre and palaces, we made art etc.
But if their interest was Iran or WW2 or comic books we could have learned all the same things.

Itsalljustapuzzle · 03/05/2026 12:35

CannotConfirm · 03/05/2026 11:28

Only relevant if the child has key mathematical concepts and the counting and measuring is at an appropriate level for each child.

Key mathematical and cognitive concepts for children learning money include:
Conservation of number
Classification
Seriation (ordering by size/value)
Subitising (recognising small quantities instantly)
One-to-one correspondence
Cardinality
Counting principles
Place value
Part-whole understanding
Equivalence (different coins having same value)
Addition and subtraction
Estimation
Symbol recognition (numerals and currency symbols)

These concepts support understanding of quantity, value, exchange, and calculation with money.
Different, of course, at different levels for each child. In the ‘IKEA’ example, it was obvious that the three children did not have the relevant concepts and as they were at different developmental stages the ‘talk’ in IKEA about money and measuring furniture was largely irrelevant.

child than a classroom lesson measuring the longest pencil or worksheets of coins in purses.
or measuring the classroom furniture, handling money in the role play shop, den building poles in the outdoor as they co constructing their den.
Very little use of worksheets on my watch and teachers very clearly steered away from this! (As a teacher, headteacher or adviser).

This sounds amazing if you’ve seen this in school. This is the type of education I want for my children.

Sadly our one of our local (ofsted rated as outstanding) primary schools teach maths to Y1 largely sat in forward facing rows with all practice using an app on a tablet. My other local primary school have only had supply teachers this entire academic year for both year 1 classes (and one of the reception classes too).

If planned well (as, if I may say so, I think I do) I can’t see why these concepts you’ve mentioned such as measuring items / den building etc can’t be covered easily as part of home education. Same with any subject/topic/skill, planned well, resourced effectively, could be done great.

However I do acknowledge not all parents would plan this level of depth though. But these activities are not delivered in every school either, so I think it comes down to the obvious conclusion of some schools are brilliant and some kids thrive there, the same conclusion at home and sadly, vice versa for both home ed and school settings.

Besidemyselfwithworry · 03/05/2026 12:47

Leftrightmiddle · 03/05/2026 10:51

The problem is you have no idea how that young person would have fared if they had started school at 4 and never been home educated. So many families end up with no option but home Ed when their child is burnt out from school.

School just isn't working for some people.
While it's possible he may have been fine if never home Ed it is also possible he may have burnt out and been damaged from the school system either way.

You’re right - nobody knows how he’d have done at 4 going into reception but their situation was that they’d planned to home educate until year 6 then send them all to secondary schools.
He was used to a lot less people and is quite a shy boy and we’ve all tried to make him very welcome and we’ve invited him and his family over.
I would never judge anyone’s choices I think people have to do what’s right for their kids don’t they? X

Watercooler · 03/05/2026 12:48

kscarpetta · 03/05/2026 12:34

Exactly this.
One of my kids was obsessed with the musical Six, so we ended up learning loads about Henry VIII, his wives, the Tudors etc.
In doing that, we did memorise some 'pub quiz' type historical facts of course, but really what they learned was about literacy, evaluating sources, change over time, creativity, morality, power, even sex education. We visited the theatre and palaces, we made art etc.
But if their interest was Iran or WW2 or comic books we could have learned all the same things.

Yes I understand you can flex to their interests. But my point is that what DC is doing now is not something I'd ever consider so my home schooling them would be channeling them into my idea of what good topics were. I'm sure other people have the time to look more broadly but my fear if we did it is that we would skip over a host of topics because I didn't like them or I hadn't done them in the 90s.

Leftrightmiddle · 03/05/2026 12:51

Watercooler · 03/05/2026 12:48

Yes I understand you can flex to their interests. But my point is that what DC is doing now is not something I'd ever consider so my home schooling them would be channeling them into my idea of what good topics were. I'm sure other people have the time to look more broadly but my fear if we did it is that we would skip over a host of topics because I didn't like them or I hadn't done them in the 90s.

And that's fine - you don't have to home Ed you can opt to send them to school like you have. It's a choice you can make. But equally people can choose to home ed

CannotConfirm · 03/05/2026 12:57

Leftrightmiddle · 03/05/2026 11:37

What is provided in school.is only relevant if the child has the key mathematical concepts they need at that stage.
When a pupil hasn't grasped the key concepts - but the class is moving on to the next stage of learning they won't be able to fully access the next stage because the underpinning knowledge isn't secure.
You can't hold the whole class up and not progress through the curriculum for one child because the curriculum is so full you won't cover the curriculum if you have to spend 6 weeks on a concept that has been schemed to be covered in 3.

That is adaptive teaching. That is what we are trained to do - provide appropriate learning, pitch, addressing gaps for those that need more, providing extensions for those that have grasped it and can either move on or deepen their knowledge. Part of the extension is independent use and application of key concepts.

I’ve supported newly qualified teachers to unpick children’s learning and gaps to make sure the next steps are planned appropriately for the child.

Thepeopleversuswork · 03/05/2026 13:01

@Leftrightmiddle

Do you not know that many many young people are being terribly failed by schools in the UK?
Children in schools learning absolutely nothing because mainstream schools can't meet needs.
Children suicidal because schools are causing them huge distress and trauma.
I know some amazing home educators who provide their children with an education that a school could never replicate.
I also know others who didn't set out to home Ed but did so because it was the only way to safeguard their child.
I don't think many parents would opt for school when the choice is school and dead child or home Ed and alive child.
Education is not as vital as wellbeing and health

I completely acknowledge this, which is why I went out of my way in my post to say that HE can be an extremely high quality education. And I recognise that a lot of children are being failed by school. I think it's entirely legitimate that a lot of people feel their children are better educated at home.

But the point you're missing is that currently there's no way for education authorities to distinguish between parents who are genuinely committed to providing a good education and those who for their own reasons just can't really be bothered with organising their lives enough to get their children into school. Good parents who are dealing with distressed children should be able to make that case to the LEA easily. But the fact that people can just opt out with no oversight whatsoever is a scandal.

kscarpetta · 03/05/2026 13:06

Watercooler · 03/05/2026 12:48

Yes I understand you can flex to their interests. But my point is that what DC is doing now is not something I'd ever consider so my home schooling them would be channeling them into my idea of what good topics were. I'm sure other people have the time to look more broadly but my fear if we did it is that we would skip over a host of topics because I didn't like them or I hadn't done them in the 90s.

The school curriculum is currently channelled into what Michael Gove remembers rote learning when he was at school, so I doubt your topics would be any worse 😂

Leftrightmiddle · 03/05/2026 13:07

CannotConfirm · 03/05/2026 12:57

That is adaptive teaching. That is what we are trained to do - provide appropriate learning, pitch, addressing gaps for those that need more, providing extensions for those that have grasped it and can either move on or deepen their knowledge. Part of the extension is independent use and application of key concepts.

I’ve supported newly qualified teachers to unpick children’s learning and gaps to make sure the next steps are planned appropriately for the child.

Well the training isn't transferring to actual schools because it isn't working well for SEN pupils

I am a teacher myself and - I am pretty skilled at adapting but even so there are pupils in yr 8 that didn't grasp primary level maths

kscarpetta · 03/05/2026 13:08

CannotConfirm · 03/05/2026 12:57

That is adaptive teaching. That is what we are trained to do - provide appropriate learning, pitch, addressing gaps for those that need more, providing extensions for those that have grasped it and can either move on or deepen their knowledge. Part of the extension is independent use and application of key concepts.

I’ve supported newly qualified teachers to unpick children’s learning and gaps to make sure the next steps are planned appropriately for the child.

That sounds ideal.
Sadly not reality though.
Look at the outcomes for children educated at school.
Look at how many SEN children are totally failed.
Look at the rising levels of EBSA.
Look how many teachers hate their jobs and are leaving the profession.

kscarpetta · 03/05/2026 13:09

Leftrightmiddle · 03/05/2026 13:07

Well the training isn't transferring to actual schools because it isn't working well for SEN pupils

I am a teacher myself and - I am pretty skilled at adapting but even so there are pupils in yr 8 that didn't grasp primary level maths

25% of them didn't grasp primary level maths so we're not even talking the odd few.

Leftrightmiddle · 03/05/2026 13:09

Thepeopleversuswork · 03/05/2026 13:01

@Leftrightmiddle

Do you not know that many many young people are being terribly failed by schools in the UK?
Children in schools learning absolutely nothing because mainstream schools can't meet needs.
Children suicidal because schools are causing them huge distress and trauma.
I know some amazing home educators who provide their children with an education that a school could never replicate.
I also know others who didn't set out to home Ed but did so because it was the only way to safeguard their child.
I don't think many parents would opt for school when the choice is school and dead child or home Ed and alive child.
Education is not as vital as wellbeing and health

I completely acknowledge this, which is why I went out of my way in my post to say that HE can be an extremely high quality education. And I recognise that a lot of children are being failed by school. I think it's entirely legitimate that a lot of people feel their children are better educated at home.

But the point you're missing is that currently there's no way for education authorities to distinguish between parents who are genuinely committed to providing a good education and those who for their own reasons just can't really be bothered with organising their lives enough to get their children into school. Good parents who are dealing with distressed children should be able to make that case to the LEA easily. But the fact that people can just opt out with no oversight whatsoever is a scandal.

I'm not missing that point but until LA have a way to ensure all pupils can be properly educated in schools to meet SEN needs I don't think the LA can effectively judge anyway.

The LA has to get their own house in order before they start trying to arrange other homes

TempestTost · 03/05/2026 13:10

It's actually very easy now to find out things, there is go much information available online. Many different curricula, blogs, there are forums where you can interact with other home educators. You can also easily access your own local school learning outcomes in most places if that's what you want. There are conferences, meet up groups.

It's quite different than the old days of home education where parents had to make the best of it by finding whatever they could about education or home education at the library, adapt curricula intended for classroom use, and so on. But even then it wasn't impossible it's not like material on education wasn't or isn't available.

In some ways the biggest challenge now for home education is people thinking it can just be online lessons. They can be great to supplement, especially some subjects at higher levels. But no child can really be educated in front of a computer, and there is a slew of people taking kids out of schools that are shit thinking online education is the answer because they don't trust that it is possible for them to teach even fairly young kids.

Bunnyofhope · 03/05/2026 13:11

Thepeopleversuswork · 03/05/2026 13:01

@Leftrightmiddle

Do you not know that many many young people are being terribly failed by schools in the UK?
Children in schools learning absolutely nothing because mainstream schools can't meet needs.
Children suicidal because schools are causing them huge distress and trauma.
I know some amazing home educators who provide their children with an education that a school could never replicate.
I also know others who didn't set out to home Ed but did so because it was the only way to safeguard their child.
I don't think many parents would opt for school when the choice is school and dead child or home Ed and alive child.
Education is not as vital as wellbeing and health

I completely acknowledge this, which is why I went out of my way in my post to say that HE can be an extremely high quality education. And I recognise that a lot of children are being failed by school. I think it's entirely legitimate that a lot of people feel their children are better educated at home.

But the point you're missing is that currently there's no way for education authorities to distinguish between parents who are genuinely committed to providing a good education and those who for their own reasons just can't really be bothered with organising their lives enough to get their children into school. Good parents who are dealing with distressed children should be able to make that case to the LEA easily. But the fact that people can just opt out with no oversight whatsoever is a scandal.

The thing is, it's parents not the LEA who have the legal responsibility for ensuring a child gets a suitable education
A parent can use a school if they want or do something else.
LEAs (government) dont want this to change. They fail to provide a suitable education in many cases and honestly don't want to be legally responsible.

chichi001 · 03/05/2026 13:15

I home educate my 14 year old.

He is about to sit two of his igcses.

We have done it through my own knowledge from school, Internet, library, online lessons and self study.

myfavouritedinosaur · 03/05/2026 13:18

Maybe this sounds weird but I would find it easier to home educate at secondary level, as they can access a lot of the learning themselves. It’s reception / KS1 I’d be lost with!

Thepeopleversuswork · 03/05/2026 14:13

Leftrightmiddle · 03/05/2026 13:09

I'm not missing that point but until LA have a way to ensure all pupils can be properly educated in schools to meet SEN needs I don't think the LA can effectively judge anyway.

The LA has to get their own house in order before they start trying to arrange other homes

Maybe its true that the LAs are a mess (I know they are) but it simply can’t be OK that people use this as a excuse to shrug their shoulders and allow anyone who wants to to remove their children without any oversight.

This isn’t only about education (although that’s a big part of it). Its about safeguarding. The most basic principle of the state is that it keeps citizens safe.

If parents feel their children’s needs aren’t being met in school they should absolutely be able to plan a more appropriate education for them. But there are families taking their children out and entirely neglecting their education or, worse, abusing them. Its simply not good enough to say: schools are shit + the LA is a mess therefore we don’t make any attempt to keep tabs on these children, what they are learning and what they are doing. Its a societal cop out on an epic scale which will have severe consequences for future generations.

Leftrightmiddle · 03/05/2026 14:35

Thepeopleversuswork · 03/05/2026 14:13

Maybe its true that the LAs are a mess (I know they are) but it simply can’t be OK that people use this as a excuse to shrug their shoulders and allow anyone who wants to to remove their children without any oversight.

This isn’t only about education (although that’s a big part of it). Its about safeguarding. The most basic principle of the state is that it keeps citizens safe.

If parents feel their children’s needs aren’t being met in school they should absolutely be able to plan a more appropriate education for them. But there are families taking their children out and entirely neglecting their education or, worse, abusing them. Its simply not good enough to say: schools are shit + the LA is a mess therefore we don’t make any attempt to keep tabs on these children, what they are learning and what they are doing. Its a societal cop out on an epic scale which will have severe consequences for future generations.

The instances where children have been abused may be blamed on home Ed but again it was LA failure to safeguard
Sara is an example of this. Known to social services before she was even born. Lots of instances where safeguard concerns were raised but social services opted to leave her in the home. Yes they did remove from school in the end but at this point the paperwork the school completed would have had sections where they could raise concerns over home Ed being inappropriate - they either didn't do this or if they did the person checking didn't follow up.

Home Ed or in school isn't relevant as the process already allow for safeguarding but it is no good having powers if the LA and social services don't follow up.

The LA already has the responsibility to monitor home education
The press and government focus on home Ed is deflecting from the lack of actual agencies doing what they should be

kscarpetta · 03/05/2026 14:37

The inadequate education system and the inadequate child protection system somehow is blamed on home educating families 🤔

TheNinkyNonkyIsATardis · 03/05/2026 15:05

In the early years, homeschooling is just a continuation of parenting. Nobody taught me how to teach my son to count or recognise letters etc.

mydaughterisademon · 03/05/2026 15:14

We’re about to do it, but funded through an ehcp. So my daughter will have tutors and therapists etc. I won’t be doing any of the teaching myself.

I’d love for her to go to school, but it just doesn’t work for her and her needs