Any ideas what’s wrong with me?

[Whatswr]

High temperature since Sunday. Monday morning till now dirreah and being sick. Very tired and every time I get up I’m dizzy. I’ve lost 4lb over past 2 days. I cannot eat or drink anything as it comes out from both ends (sorry!). I didn’t go work yesterday and got made to feel really guilty. I got ready today to go work but straight away I had an accident again. I left an apologetic message with work but I feel like crap as I think they must be thinking I’m making it all up. My kids had to walk into school themselves this morning as I couldn’t get out of the car (all safe as I take them to breakfast club so we can park in school car park as it’s early at 7:30). I have no idea how I will pick them up today as I feel I’m getting worse. DH is away with work till Thursday. I’m all alone and feel really fed up. Any ideas what’s wrong with me and how can I stop feeling guilty about not going into work? I rarely take a day off. Would you have taken day off?

Yes, absolutely take sick leave. It's probably a virus.

Well you definitely can't work!

No one else that can pick the kids up?

When I phoned manager the time was like I’m making it up. I have such bad anxiety and I feel guilt all the time. I’ve gone into work when I’ve been sick lots of times but I just couldn’t do it today. How embarrassing would I be if I had another accident. I even packed spare trousers and clothes but just couldn’t go in.

Yes absolutely I think everyone would take a day off in your situation (or at least they should). It sounds like you have a stomach bug like norovirus. Horrible while you have it but passes quickly.

As for collecting the children - ask on your parent group if someone can collect them? Or ask the school if they can bring them out to you in the car (just say you’re unwell and don’t want to spread germs).

Hope you feel better soon.

I don’t have family here it’s just me. Maybe if I sleep till pick up then see how I feel.

I have never felt this unwell. I’ve just googled noravirus and I have all the symptoms!

I’m sorry that you are feeling rotten op 💐

It’s especially awful when your dh is away and you are in charge of dc. That is the worst bit of parenting I think. Also when they are ill and you are on your own.

Sounds like you have a virus and you need to rest as much as possible but keep taking little sips of flat lemonade every 15 mins to keep hydrated. Or buy some sachets from the chemist and ask their advice. Or get something delivered by an on-line chemist.

Do you have the name of a friendly parent in one of your dc’s classes who would drop your children back home for you? If you don’t, this is the catalyst you need to get a small group of friendly parents together who can help one another out in a crisis situation. Everyone needs help occasionally!

Once home, it’s survival time. Ping microwave food and you can all sit in front of telly while you rest.

Do you need to ring your doctor to get a sickness certificate for work? Everyone gets ill occasionally and as long as you are not off sick regularly for no good reason, then your work should be understanding about you having a couple of days off to recover from a viral illness which is what this sounds like. It hardly helps them if you spread this illness around your workplace.

If in doubt, look up NHS guidelines or ring 111 for advice.

I hope you feel much better soon and rest as much as you can while the dc are in class.

Of course you can’t work when you are suffering at both ends. Your manager sounds awful. Don’t feel guilty Op. You can’t work when you are not in control of your bowels. It’s your manager who is being unreasonable.

Any ideas what’s wrong with me

You have a sickness and diarrhoea bug - nothing more nothing less.

If in doubt, look up NHS guidelines or ring 111 for advice.

For goodness sake, can no one manage a simple illness now without ringing 111???

For goodness sake, can no one show a bit of compassion to someone who would not have gone to the trouble of posting had they not felt a bit alone and really unwell?

We can all lose confidence in ourselves in those moments.

Have you had the experience of being responsible for small dc when feeling wretched yourself, because I have and it’s utterly crap.

And btw, did you notice that I included the word “if” which most literate people understand to mean that it’s by no means obligatory, but it might be wise to contact 111 should the symptoms become worse? Not to do so as a matter of course.

Finally, what is wrong with you that you feel compelled to comment negatively on a thread that is there to help someone feel better?

Op take no notice and I hope you are starting to feel much better today. Norovirus is no joke.

For goodness sake, can no one show a bit of compassion to someone who would not have gone to the trouble of posting had they not felt a bit alone and really unwell?
We can all lose confidence in ourselves in those moments.

It is a bug - a self limiting bug - hardly the need for compassion - she isn't on her death bed.

I am surprised someone didn't mention counselling or therapy.

You don’t know what else is going on in people’s lives. Best not to judge. For all you know, this bug might be the last straw. And Noro can be really hideous without any other background issue, especially when you are responsible for young dc and can’t rest.

Why are you so determined to be unpleasant?

If it makes you feel better, fine, carry on, but I feel sorry for you if that is the case.

There is always the option of simply not commenting if something irritates you that much.

Make sure you’re drinking so you don’t get dehydrated. You defiantly can’t work
and you’ll be very contagious! Hope your children don’t catch it.

I was going to say noro virus.

The good news is Noro tends to pass quickly (24h in, you should soon be over the worst?) the bad news is is it's quite contagious so the kids may end up getting it too.

Sleep, sleep, sleep and hydrate and if you are really stuck later then ring the school and see what they can do? Is there after school clubs? Any staff that pass your way?

Do you know any other parents? I had a mum on my road flag me down one morning when her little one was poorly and asked me to walk her older DC to school - we had never spoken before but saw each other most days on the school run so I was familiar and I had two young DD's with me.

We swapped numbers and in fact are now on friendly terms and I'd happily do it again anytime for her (and vice versa)

Is there a school WhatsApp group you could ask on? I'd help anyone I could that asked on my chats.

If I hadn't called 111 when my partner and I had had sickness and diarrhoea for several days, we wouldn't have known we had campylobacter poisoning.

I agree the OP probably does just have a bug, but she obviously feels worse than she has previously and has been ill for longer so it's understandable that she's wondering if there's something worse going on and calling 111 would be perfectly reasonable.