AIBU to rip out a beautiful garden in potential house?

[Mum2HC]

Looking at new house - only one we like. Owner is an older couple who have spent years creating a garden worthy of an National Trust property!! The issue is we do not enjoy gardening and do not want to have to pay a gardener to keep all the flowers in check. Would it be awful to take out half the gardens flowers and replace with grass? It is 0.8 acre so a very big garden and our children would much prefer all turf to play football etc. It would feel almost criminal to do it but we don't want the upkeep - they also have a large rose garden which we would rather take out and have a vegetable garden. Is this all just too much?! It is the only house we like in our ideal location. It must be a full time job to look after it!!

It's not the house for you. It's do depressing to look around at properties having their souls ripped out.
I know it's extreme but I actually wouldn't sell to someone if I thought they were going to do that to our garden. It's the equivalent to people who render old houses, put plastic windows in and get rid of the front garden in favour of tarmac and huge ugly gates.

Yes completely agree! They agree the garden will be putting people off and they would be very happy for any potential buyers to do whatever they wanted to make the garden easier if it meant a sale!

GasPanic "Much as people might wish to bemoan the lost of wildlife habitat, it is really small beer in the 100,000 square miles of the UK. Even if every person removed their garden, such a small % of the UK is actually built on that it would probably make a negligible difference to biodiversity. Wildlife is best left in the wild IMO."

UK private gardens take up about a million hectares of the country. That's about four times the space of our nations nature reserves.

A Royal Horticultural Society survey found that "Gardens support more than 50 million trees and thousands of species. They host approximately half of the UK’s butterfly, amphibian and reptile species, and more than 40% of bird and mammal species. They also store an estimated 158m tonnes of carbon and gardens that aren't paved are a huge contributor to the nation's flood defences.

Our gardens form a green corridor for wildlife to move from wild place to wild place.

Urban gardens provide 85% of the nectar that sustain pollinators in our cities and towns.

You say "Wildlife is best left in the wild IMO."
Only 6% of our nation's land is actually classed as wild.

That's only slightly more land than the 5% that is private gardens.

If every person removed their garden the effects of wildlife would be catastrophic for nature in our country.

Personally, I'd have to look fir and buy another home. I'm.a keen gardener and couldn't do that. It would be yours to do whatever you wanted though.....

This is making me so sad. I see lots of people around where I am pace over their front gardens for their car. It’s awful. And the cars don’t fit the front garden so they all stick out onto the pavement. We still have w lot of plants on our front garden and don’t intend to change it (as do both our next door neighbours) but if we sell I know the next family will rip it all up.

Don't you dare.

I cannot understand these replies. If OP doesn’t buy the house, 99% certain the person who does will rip out at least some of the garden. All OP will achieve by not buying it is not doing that herself and not having a property that is the right size and location for her and her family’s needs.

@Mum2HC as said above - buy it, clear some lawn for your kids if needed, spend a year in it to see which bits you like and whether it is the hard work you think it is and set to work on it a year later.

If you don’t buy it, someone else will, and they are unlikely to be enamoured with the burden of a show garden either.

Much depends on what is annual and what is perennial, bulbs etc. I keep a bigger garden than that looking vaguely civilised with the help of a gardener two mornings a month. I do more in summer because I like pots of flowers but basically its under control.

Gardens are very expensive to plant so you are potentially not just pulling out habitat and hard work, but also likely thousands of pounds worth of plants which you may regret in retrospect. Before doing anything I would chat to a local horticulturalist about how easy it might be to keep what is there at low maintenance, you might be surprised. You can then make choices about what you want to do, but are a bit more informed. You wouldn’t be the first person to buy a house with a big garden and no love of Gardening only to discover…
At the end of the day, it is your house so if you want more lawn for your children, then that should be part of the plan and hopefully with that much garden, it doesn’t necessarily mean you have to lose all of what is there.

I guess what I’m saying is no not unreasonable, at the end of the day it would be your house and you can do with it what you will. But I would definitely try and not do anything too quickly or without a bit more information. Our house was something of a local show garden prior to us moving in and it is a lot more relaxed now. I don’t have time for the kind of annual displays that they put on however, it’s still lovely and I am grateful for their expertise in picking out some of the plants that give me pleasure every year with no effort whatsoever on my part.

Just a quick few thoughts on robot mowers.

They don't always mow right up to the edge against walls for example.
You still have to trim/strim the edges regularly.
You also have to work on the edges to stop the grass roots straying into the borders. The mower does nothing about that.

They tend to mulch grass as they go rather than pick it up.
To minimise the negative effects of this you have to set it mowing often so the grass is kept very short. This is the worst kind of lawn for wildlife.

Over time the mulch still builds up and will form a mat that causes algae and moss. This will make the lawn look worse, patchy and dry out in summer to brown patches. The answer is the hard work raking over of the lawn.

You will still need to aerate your lawn (go over it with a fork or aerater) once a year or you will have compacted areas of moss, algae, poor growth.

You seem very certain. Not everyone shares your values, thankfully.

I am sure someone has said this before, but could you sell part of it to someone who does want to maintain it? A friend of mine did this with her garden and all it was was a patch of grass and a few flowerbeds (1910s terrace) but she was disabled and didn't need it. A local family who lived in a flat had it as their little sun patch for many years.

that's not the actual garden, its the same kind of manicured look.

Sad, but you could literally pave it over and it’s your prerogative. Plus hiring gardeners is very very expensive.

Be sensible with the plants though. You could make a lot of money selling mature bushes, flower clumps etc etc. And I mean thousands from a garden that size. If you buy it, team up with a gardener (or please private message me and I will buy stuff!!!)

I am 99% certain - have watched the beautiful gardens of several elderly couples who have passed on or sold up in my street in recent years get ripped up within months. The one opposite had a glorious front garden - wisteria gone and all the shrubs ripped out for contractors equipment as they extend and renovate. Million pound properties, gardens developed over 40-50 years of residence.

Just as I’ve seen stunning, new £50k kitchens be ripped out with the same alacrity. There is no accounting for taste and once a person has purchased the property, there is nothing anyone can do. The prior owners of our house will have felt the same way when we took diggers to the atrocity they called a waterfall rockery that led into a carp pond and took out the trees and shrubs that partitioned our garden. Our garden is still stunning - with thousands of pounds new shrubs and plants (and pollen attractants) - it is just different now.

I’ve never met anyone who didn’t relandscape according to the needs of their families. Plant die and can be replanted, gardens can be reimagined around new families. If @Mum2HC loves the house, she should buy it. And if she choses to relandscape, that is her choice … and hardly the ecological disaster of the century, is it? But I am absolutely certain (99% at least) that another buyer will likely alter it too, so it may as well be her.

ETA - there is nothing wrong with my ‘Values’ by the way. Our garden is designed to be a pollen and bird attractor. I am just realistic and have observed this happening for over 30 years. And mind boggled that you think acknowledging that most people will change the property and/or garden is such a heinous crime.

i have never aerated a lawn in my life! My mower is also set to mulch and spread also.

I can see some comments about lawn maintenance and moss, etc. Just to say, we have embraced our moss, apparently it’s a brilliant carbon sink, we appear to be host to half the nations bumblebees and it’s still green so what’s not to like??? Between the moss and the islands of unmown grass that we leave for interest our lawn stays impressively, green, even in hot weather. Just another perspective on that one.

I do think it's very sad to rip up a beautiful well established garden however your house has to fit your needs. If it's entirely flowerbeds with no space for the kids to play then it doesn't work for a family home. I also think if the house is right for you it would be silly to say no for that reason, it could be sold to someone who rips the whole thing up and covers it in astroturf!

If you can keep some of the bigger, low maintenance plants and also make a decent sized lawn space that would be a nice compromise. Established flower beds are so good for biodiversity and it would be a tragedy to rip everything out.

I'm a rubbish gardener and have very little time but I absolutely love my garden. I find my established flowerbeds very low maintenance and my lawn a huge pain in the arse! I'm constantly mowing it, watering it and pulling up dandelions while my rose bushes etc take very little work and look absolutely beautiful.

I personally think you would be utterly bonkers to dig up rose bushes for a vegetable patch - that seems like far more effort that it's worth if you don't actually like gardening!

Good luck with it whatever you decide (unless you decide to pave it/astroturf it, in which case you're pretty much a criminal in my eyes).

🌻🌹🌷

Ooh be careful - people will be on to criticise ‘your values’ if you suggest that anyone other than OP might also plan to rip out/alter the garden…

The easiest way to aerate a lawn is to get your teenage son and his friends to walk up and down it in their spiked soled trainers. Love the idea of a mulch and spread mower but we have spaniels and they’d be traipsing grass in forever.

You don’t want to do gardening and you are concerned about the work, yet you want to rip out a rose garden and replace it with vegetables? I promise you, the veg garden will be far more work, believe me, I know.

Is this the property for you, and not a large, new property with a small, plain garden on an executive estate that would suit a growing family?

I wouldn’t underestimate the work and cost of demolishing the garden, having a planner in, even out the beds etc, laying more lawn, hiring equipment etc etc and if you are not keen gardeners, it may well look a complete mess if try it yourselves. My former neighbours did this when they moved in, due to having kids and dogs. Twice they sectioned the lawn to reseed it, so it was unusable as the kids were kept off it. Always looked a shabby mess. They stayed at the property less than 5 years. Where will you be in that time?

As another person has said, it probably wouldn’t require the upkeep you think, if you are prepared to be a bit more relaxed about it, and certainly I suspect it would likely look better than any change you would make if you are not keen gardeners. These days my husband and I can’t manage the garden how we used to. We are more relaxed, just sit and enjoy it, but every now and then put in a couple of hours and make a big difference in that time.

Obviously it’s up to you, but the song “They paved paradise, put up a parking lot” comes to mind, (though it’s a bit too harsh), but I also fear for the bees, butterflies, birds etc that will have benefitted from a garden like that, all of which also teach your children to value biodiversity. I hope whoever buys the property will really cherish it. This is the other point though isn’t it: someone will buy it, who knows what they will do. If you care deep down, you might be the best people to buy it.

I agree with the suggestions that if you purchase it, don’t let the plants go to waste. Contact your local gardening groups AND hardy plant associations and ask if people want to come and dig up plants from your garden. Ensure you give them time to inform members of their clubs at their meetings so confirm with them when that will be. Also offer free plants to neighbours. Other local FB groups would be worth investigating for ideas of who would like them.

can you show us the house? May be then we will understand why it is the right house with the wrong garden....is it a mini mansion?

I guess you don't know much about biodiversity then? Rural foxes are completely dying out and urban ones are thriving so it's hard to leave wildlife just in the wild isn't it? Many species of birds prefer the towns and villages too. We need diverse garden spaces to support the insects they rely on. I think everyone who owns a bit of a garden, balcony, patio, courtyard can play their parts. Don't forget when bees die off we will all starve so... 🤷‍♀️

Oh my God, I would kill to be able to buy somewhere with an established garden that beautiful. Keeping on top of it would be nothing compared to the work and the money and the years that went into creating it. I have a beautiful garden myself. The only thing wrong with it is that there isn't enough space for all the plants I wish I had but can't squeeze in.

Crime, no. Ethically dubious, yes, absolutely. If you're so concerned about the environment, you've created a wonderful garden, good for you. I'm surprised you can't see the issue. There are plenty of new build boxes built each year which have the same blank turf canvas - why completely destroy a thing of beauty because your kids might want to kick about in it for five minutes? Let it go wild, create a small lawn if you must but ripping out an entire garden is beyond awful. And on this we will agree to disagree.

I can see some comments about lawn maintenance and moss, etc. Just to say, we have embraced our moss, apparently it’s a brilliant carbon sink, we appear to be host to half the nations bumblebees and it’s still green so what’s not to like??? Between the moss and the islands of unmown grass that we leave for interest our lawn stays impressively, green, even in hot weather. Just another perspective on that one.

We never treat the moss in the grass, the soil is very heavy marshy clay so we'd be fighting a losing battle with the bad drainage. The moss is very useful for hanging baskets and moss poles for indoor climbers. I agree that our grass never gets that bleached ground look in a hot summer.

But I still think the cutting and edge trimming is a complete faff.