Soft behaviour in schools

[ImLosingMyMiind]

Currently a TA in a primary school. I've been there since last summer.

The schools approach to behaviour is too soft. The older ones especially are an absolute nightmare. Running away from teachers. Smirking. Food fights in the hall. Laughing when being spoken to. Back chatting.

We do behaviour forms and give them to the teachers and they do get spoken to, but there's no big punishment. The children don't learn that their behaviour isn't acceptable.

I've had it now. I've worked in numerous schools throughout my career and I've never seen anything like it.

I want to change jobs. And I'm looking now. I'm so stressed with it. Why are some schools like this. The head is lovely, and all staff members I like apart from one other TA.

This is more of a rant. So I apologise. Has anyone else experienced this situation?

Yes and I left. It will only get worse and affect your wellbeing.

The head isn't lovely if they are failing these kids and not providing a safe learning environment or supporting staff. They are taking a pay cheque and not doing their job. What a shambles.

My mental health is awful because of it. I got out of work Wednesday and cried in my car.

Is there anyone I can report this to does anyone know? I don't want to speak with the governors as they are very close to the head.

Are they trying to do restorative practice but failing I wonder. Like gentle parenting often being misunderstood for permissive parenting - they sound like theyre being too permissive

State?

The problem is that 'big punishments' are hard to mete out and kids quickly get inured to them. Without solid home/school relationships and consistent standards the school are fighting a losing battle.

What do you think the school can realistically do?

As previous poster said. Too few sanctions available really. I imagine these kids are completely desensitised to any punishments. It isn't as easy as people think to just exclude them, you need to show that you have already exhausted other methods and followed the behaviour policy consistently and to be honest as an ultimate 'punishment' exclusion rarely works.
What does the school behaviour policy say?
How would you like to see the behaviour dealt with?

You could try novelty behaviour management for your own sanity until you leave eg hand out “Mrs whatever your whateveryournameis” stickers to children/reward the good behaviour with longer break times eg if your responsibility is lining up at end of play, take a whiteboard out and make it a competition, which class are quickest to line up silently? That class get five mins extra play on Friday lunchtime. Etc etc
switch it up as much as you can for your own sanity, join teaching Facebook groups for ideas. Anticipate as much as possible eg I know Christmas is carnage so I have a special reward system for my class in the last two weeks of term
You could have a special stationary set plus cushion, whichever child follows instructions the best gets to use them the following day. Take time to acknowledge the children doing the right thing.
befriend the children doing the worst behaviour, read “when the adults change everything Changes“, that’s a great book on positive behaviour management

google positive noticing, it does make a difference. Eg I cover year 5/6 one lesson a week, I make sure I say hi/nice goal at break time etc to the worst offenders every time I see them walk past. It took about a month but they want to behave and therefore learn more with me now.

if you still have the energy, research and make some positive change! Don’t give up!

What did you want them to do?

ask teaching colleagues who haven’t lost their love of it for advice.
sanctions don’t work with this generation, and don’t expect them to know what to do. Explicitly model everything, and aim for boring them into compliance through relentless routine, positive relationships and calm. Eg I just stand with my finger on my lips and wait for silence, I go to my happy place in my head (currently a desert island) and just wait it out. The children know every time we finish early we go to play early. If they’ve made me wait ages I just quietly say “ what a shame I had to wait five minutes for you to stop talking this lesson, we could have had five minutes in the sun right now”
also just be kind to yourself. If it’s not the right school, try a different one

What do you expect the school to do?

What kind of behaviour management do you think would work better?

Children learn best when they feel safe, relaxed and confident. They cannot focus on the learning if they are spending their days afraid of what might happen if the put a foot wrong. And the children who are least able to rein it in are also the ones who do not respond well to sanctions.

Yes, behaviour is worse in schools, but there are many contributing factors for this.