AIBU to think a cottage is not a holiday?

[Jogonpolly]

Looking to go away in half term (DH and 2DC age 7&10).

I'd ideally like a short haul all inclusive somewhere - good weather and easy for them kids to be occupied. But with the jet fuel issue I don't feel confident booking incase we lose our money.

I suggested going somewhere in Europe by train. A hotel, pool and play area some places to visit, maybe a city or something.

DH has suggested a cottage in the UK, Devon or somewhere. Problem is, I just don't see a cottage as a holiday - in a hotel someone makes your bed and cleans the bathroom. You can choose to eat out or in the hotel restaurant, you don't need to drive anywhere, decisions are easy, everything is easy. My experiences of cottages in the UK are of same shit, different (and more difficult)place. There will still be cleaning to do, breakfast to sort even if we do go out for lunch and dinner, there's more planning and organising. I think I'd just rather not go.

AIBU and a misery?

And before people say it, yes, DH will do some of the organising and cleaning but still, it's just like being at home!

I'd also be happy with a city break, sightseeing etc. doesn't need to be an all inclusive place!

I do both regularly - hotels and cottage. I enjoy the freedom of holidaying in a cottage/apartment where I can breakfast when I want and don't have to converse with folk. I've been all over the UK and love booking a place that is all ours.

Short stays in hotels are ok too. No longer than a couple of days.

We only ever go on UK holiday cottage type holidays for a variety of reasons. I do understand not wanting to do everything you do at home somewhere different, especially when your children are smaller and can't muck in with the end of visit jobs.
Could be worse though, he could have suggested camping, although children generally enjoy the feralness of it all !

Because we aren't in the hotel room. We're in the hotel pool, games room, playground.

When we go to a hotel, we use the room solely as a bedroom/ bathroom and spend the rest of the time using the other facilities that come with being in a hotel complex abroad.

That's fine, me too, but I would assume it was your parents doing all the work, rather than you. I look back on my childhood holidays fondly, but it's VERY different as an adult!

Done several of these and it just doesn’t feel like a proper holiday if a Tesco van is delivering the food. I’m ok to self cater abroad but in the UK it’s just all same shit but slightly harder.

I think this is the divide. My kids are 18/21. And I would NOW consider going to a cottage on holiday. But when I had kids? I’d rather clean the front drive. With a toothbrush.

Pretty much all our holidays are self-catering in the UK, preferably a big old house all by itself with plenty of outdoor space somewhere mountainous. Not at all keen on hotels with kids; it always seems like more hassle to me as you can't just send them out the door if they want to be somewhere other than your room, which they do pretty much all the time. Each to their own though.

I absolutely agree about self catering holidays being a bit shit. I don’t like having to keep a house clean, strip beds, wash up etc on holiday.
Weirdly I don’t mind camping but we still don’t really cook and my standards are lower in a tent.

I also won’t rent a house/apartment that could house someone so purpose built holiday accommodation only for me. If we do rent somewhere it’s usually a cabin or similar.

Give me an AI resort or hotel every time.

I love a cottage holiday.
Book a gorgeous cottage,nicer than your own home so it feels special.
If you are out most of the day it wont get dirty, no need to clean, they clean it at the end anyway .
You have more space, can get a takeaway or eat out. If you dont want to drive everyday book in a seaside town or larger village within walking distance to pubs, shops, beach etc
There are some lovely places in the UK, the only thing is you cant guarantee the weather, and doing day trips and eating out in uk can get pricey

When my DC were young, I preferred self -catering holiday cottages, and we could not afford to go abroad anyway.
Over time, we tearned the hard way some things we would not compromise on.
For example, I wanted to have an outside area for play, and eating if necessary.
I personally did not find the 'catering' as such, onerous, as my DC helped more than usualy due to the excitement of being away.
We took lots of short cuts with preparing food, etc.
I did not do any cleaning, but tidied up on the last day, before we left.
We sometimes ate our lunch out, but not the dinner in the evening.
Sometimes, I was on my own as my DH was unable to come along.
Note. In the old days, we had to supply our own bedlinen, but this is usually supplied these days, and beds made up, etc.

I like a cottage that's in a town with lots of shops and restaurants within easy walking distance. I find it really relaxing and a real treat to just be able to wander down to a harbour or go to a cafe and look at the sea etc. I don't do any cleaning unless really needed.

Having this discussion with DH at the moment. Week in lake district with the dog. He wants to stay in a hotel as he likes a cooked breakfast and thinks same old shit different place about holiday homes. I just think it gives us a bit more space in the evening…

I also only had these types of holiday as a child and, going against the grain here, didn’t even really enjoy them as a child either. My parents seemed stressed and were constantly cooking, cleaning and being irritable. It was like being at home but with less of your stuff. Fewer books to read, toys to play with. Other than day trips to National Trust type places it was just watching TV and playing in the garden, both of which we could do at home 🤷‍♀️

I never fancied resort holidays before children and can’t imagine making friends on holiday as an adult, but I have to admit these types of holidays are great for children and if they make friends it makes the whole holiday.

I already live in a country cottage. Id be going to another one without my stuff or my cats. Id rather be at home. Id prefer to go sightseeing or museum surfing in London.

I would rather have the cottage

Sounds like you need a proper holiday this time! I think cottages can be a holiday if you choose the right one, but if you are tired and want a holiday where you don't have to do anything it is not that. City breaks are holidays too but not relaxing in the same way as an all inclusive.

There are some nice hotels in Devon, though. Right next to beaches with lots of cafes around.

I am not sure Europe does all inclusive anything like as well as Greece etc but all inclusive camps do exist in the s of france. Expensive, rooms not as good, weather not as good, but more certainty over getting home.

You see, we do all that on holiday. A couple of years ago we went to Italy. We did day trips to Pisa, Florence and Lucca and the hotel was in a lovely small town on the outskirts where we mooched and went to the beach.

In the evenings we read on the terrace with a bottle of wine. Was heaven.

When I was a teenager my mother put her foot down when my father suggested a caravan park holiday as she knew what would happen. It would be a busman's holiday for her.

@Jogonpolly I agree, it doesn't feel like a real holiday booking a cottage in the UK.

Train trip to somewhere in Europe is a great idea and very straightforward if you get the Eurostar. Or what about a road trip to somewhere in northern france? There's some lovely places on the Normandy and Brittany coast that are in easy reach and a couple of hours away from Calais (and even less if you get one of the ferries to either of those areas).

How about DH takes the children to a cottage, and you have a "holiday" at home.

Of course it’s a holiday.
We can’t afford hotels so go camping or to a caravan. We all love it.

We regularly stay in cottages. We always make sure to choose somewhere that's nice (fire / hot-tub / amazing view etc) and that's walkable to shops, restaurants and a bar. I refuse to do any cooking on holiday. I hate cooking for my family at the best of times, never mind on holiday!

"The cottage is the relevant bit ...have never been fussed about cottage type holidays as it does just seem like same shit, different place."

You're totally entitled to your opinion about what you want to do on holiday, and what you do not want to do on holiday. So, in that respect, of course you are NBU.

In contrast, for me personally, I have a very different opinion. When I was younger, I regularly travelled, both in this country and abroad, as part of my job. I grew to hate staying in hotels.

I must admit that we have only rented a cottage a couple of times in the UK (it was mostly abroad). But the only cleaning we ever did was to do the washing up and put any rubbish in the bin.

Likewise, whenever we have stayed in cottages or homes abroad, it was the same thing; we would do the washing up and put the rubbish in the bin. And that's all (for context, this wasn't through AirBnB or similar but through companies that specialise in holiday homes/villas).

Self-catering accommodation gives you the choice of either going out to local shops and finding interesting things to cook or going to local restaurants - it's totally your choice - rather than being forced to eat at a restaurant for every single meal of your holiday.

"No on-site activities is also part of it."

I'm not really sure that most hotels provide "on-site activities" as a matter of course (and certainly not included in the price - these are usually optional extras or included in a package deal).

However, if you are into water sports and other outdoor activities, then there are some really great hotel chains that do have a whole load of on-site activities.

One such company is Mark Warner (mostly in Greece and Turkey) but Neilson also operate in this area and, arguably I would say, are rather better.

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But, if you want on-site activities combined with self-catering in the UK then there are certainly lots of options. You may consider some of them to be beneath you.

These range from the likes of Butlins at the cheaper end to Center Parcs at the most expensive (although, Center Parcs is a lot cheaper in France and the Netherlands).

Center Parcs (more particularly, those in Europe) have a large range of family activities to take part in.

I grew up as a child spending my holidays at either Butlins or Pontins. Pontins mostly closed down in 2023 but Butlins is still around.

Both Butlins and Pontins were very much about entertaining the masses while on holiday at places like Bognor Regis or Prestatyn.

I remember there being shows put on every evening (in the same way that there are on cruise ships these days) and there were lots of different activities during the day as well.

Just as an aside, thinking back about it now, I was (and still am) surprised that there was a snooker hall with a dozen or more full-size snooker tables (about 3.5m by 2m). We went in there once and I was really surprised that it was absolutely full of men playing snooker (for context, this was back in the 1970s).

So, I would say, you are definitely not BU to want what you want.

However, if you are looking down on people who want something different then you would BU

So that's not just "hotel". That's a very specific type of hotel.

You can also get self catering cottages in complexes with pools, games rooms and playgrounds. It sounds like you would find that preferable to staying in a Premier inn.

It's not a holiday for mum (you) if your doing the exact same thing as you do at home ! I always felt like I needed a a week away by myself after a week away in cottage in UK !! I get it been there done that !!!