It's another inheritance one...

[Meudantte]

Mary is in her 80s. Her DH died 15 years ago.

Two children
Jane in her 60s with two grown up children.
Sarah who died a decade ago in her 50s. Left a widower and two grown up children.

Before Sarah's death Mary's will basically divided the estate 50/50 between 2 daughters with a small amount for each grandchild eg £5-10k

Since Sarah's death, Mary has made changes. 50% will now go to Jane, the remaining 50% will be divided equally between the grandchildren. Sarah's husband will also like get something too.

Sarah's children have somehow found out about this (not sure how) and aren't happy. They feel like they're not being treated fairly as the original 50% for Sarah is no longer coming to that part of the family, but a smaller share, while Jane still gets 50%.

Jane will be using her share as an extra pension as she's not got a great one. Sarah would have likely done the same so these sums were never going to be passed directly to grandchildren but obviously they would benefit indirectly.

Obviously Mary can do what she likes with her money but this is causing friction and interested in perspectives. Inheritance seems to always cause feuds.

There is somebody else to be considered in this scenario. Mary’s late husband and how he may feel about the situation. Presumably Mary inherited half of the house and other things from him.
Jane may be the only daughter Mary is concerned about but surely the ex husband was concerned about both daughters.

That is quite a leap - resurrecting a long dead father of a long dead daughter and projecting your opinions on them! He could equally have abandoned them at an early age and the house been paid for by the DM!

All relative. My parents died when I was very young and had no material or financial assets to leave. Wonderful parents who left me with memories, irrespective of financial circumstances.
Yes, money brings out the worst in people. What is seen as fair to some will be seen as unfair by another.

I know, but although they were taken out back then ,it could be years before people actually cancelled their policy as most had a life insurance policy attached and there wasn't a lot of alternative options unless you had a good sum of money to buy a rental or business.

So you did it right, well done you. Not everyone has your prescience or the money to invest, I certainly didnt. Punching down may make you feel good but it makes you look bad.

There is no "should" about it. People are entitled to leave their money to whoever they want to, the idea that family are already arguing over someone's will while they are still alive is disgusting. If I heard of family members (I don't have any, fortunately) complaining about what they were getting they would find me heading to the solicitor to change my will asap.

My uncle died before my paternal grandparents and his portion of the estate was given to his son.

Alternatively, my DSS' mum died of cancer when he was 11 and she (and my DSS) were written out of his grandmother's will when it was discovered she was terminally ill. Which is just hideous IMO.

My maternal grandparents died recently and the estate was split amongst their 3 children. My mum split her share amongst my kids (her only grandchildren) as a living inheritance. My stepson is included in that split. He is closer to my mum than he is his maternal family which is very sad, we have tried to maintain it but he's an adult now and we cant force it.

Right so now we have to worry about 2 people who cannot leave nor inherit money… not the people who are actually here to leave and inherit. If I pre deceased my husband he wouldn’t ’inherit’ anything from me he would just retain what we built together… and if I didn’t trust him to allocate things as he saw fit I wouldn’t have married him. Bizarre take