This is a weird one. We’ve been divorced nearly 20 years now and it’s all very amicable and I’ve stayed close to his family and my parents in law used to look after our girls a lot during the holidays, always invite them ans me to family get togethers at Diwali etc and we invite them for Easter and Christmas etc so it’s a fabulous relationship. That’s the context.
my ex husband has two sisters and one brother and again they’ve always had a close relationship with us and we’re really supportive when we first split up because I’d discovered my husbands gambling problem. He’s now tackled that and hasn’t placed a bet in over 10 years. We’re good friends and neither of us have had any serious relationships since we split and we’ve both talked about maybe one day we may ever get back together, but feel now we’ve missed that chance and so have a good friendship. His family knkw this. Which is why I was surprised this morning when my sister in law calls me to say that my brother in law’s marriage of nearly 40 years has just ended and according to our sister in law it is because he’s in love with me. It’s insane and I don’t really know why I’m even making this post, other than to just write it all out. I’ve barely been in the same room as my brother in law for about 3 years as they live in the north of England and I’m in the south. My daughters spent some time with their family earlier this year as it was their daughters wedding and they were invited - I did wonder at the time why I wasn’t, but it wasn’t a big deal to me and as my ex wasn’t also we just assumed they were having a small one. I didn’t imagine jn a million years that it was because my sister in law suspected that I was having an affair with her husband.
im just in shock. I rang my mother in law who said that she had heard but obviously didn’t believe it. I haven’t mentioned it to my ex or our children yet because I just don’t know how to tell them.
I just don’t know what to think. I’ve never had an affair with anyone and have never thought of my brother in law as anything other than my husbands brother. I also can’t believe that a couple can go from planning their 40th wedding anniversary in a few years time to splitting up. They always seemed so happy and proof that arranged marriages work.