AIBU to insist on choosing my children's wedding outfits myself?

[PennyManyMaybe13]

BIL getting married next year. We do not get on and are low contact. MIL wants to buy my children’s clothes for wedding despite them not being in wedding party. This comes with them choosing what they wear as “needs to look good for photos”. AIBU to say no I will choose what they wear? All feels very for show and don’t want children used as probs.

Then I’d say you’re not BU. Your husband agrees. Put your kids in the close you/they choose

Can you just send dh with the kids to attend the wedding, given you don’t get on with the family?

let him argue about outfits with his mum…meanwhile, you’re off having a lovely weekend with mates/on a yoga retreat/in Las Vegas…

If anyone wanted to use your children as props they’d have been included in the wedding party.
Props, my arse.

Absolutely this!

@PennyManyMaybe13 just have the satisfaction that you are not spending more money than you have to for a wedding you don’t want to be at. Let the in-laws splash their cash. Treat yourself with the savings!

Just don’t go? Presumably as you are going it is to keep the peace.. so why start a conflict over what your children are wearing. Let mil sort out what they are wearing. It saves you money and a job.

Do the bride and groom know mils plan to match them to the toddlers?

Let her buy the clothes. Then you buy what you / dc actually want to wear.. Any fuss on the day just say they dc wanted their own choice to wear today.