AIBU to want some peace when DH plays music constantly?

[CareBearClaire]

AIBU?

My DH loves music (no problem with that) but he plays music (always of his own choice) everywhere he goes. The shower, the bedroom, the kitchen, the loo (yes!), the garden (even to hang out the washing), the car (I get that one), literally everywhere and every minute of the day. It drives me insane. He’ll set music up to play in a room, then leave the room and leave it playing, it will be on in other rooms at the same time. I then walk by, hear it playing and always have to ask him to turn it off (it’s all controlled via an app) and then he moans. I can’t walk into a room without music playing, I can’t watch the TV as it’s drowned out with the volume of music coming from the next room. I am perimenopausal which doesn’t help. It really really wears me down and it winds me up no end. Am I over-sensitive? AIBU to want peace and quiet, does everyone else have music playing at home all the time?

Buy him some decent head phones and tell him to use them!

He can wear headphones, I love music, I wear headphones, no need to have a concert in every room

I agree with headphones, not necessarily to use all the time but to give the house a good chunk of quiet time!

I get this too OP. I also love music, but when I've finished work (I wfh), I just want some bloody quiet. He honestly cannot sit in silence, ever. I really don't know what the answer it, I just roll my eyes and secretly turn it down when he's not in the room

He has multiple pairs already!!!

You can wear earplugs 😁

I really don’t want to have to wear earplugs at home just to drown out his noise though 😩 I feel he should be more respectful for shared spaces and at least occasionally play something we both like. He will never ever consider what I might like to I have to listen to his sh*te taste in music all the time 😭

Keep turning it off everywhere.
Very rude and selfish.
I wouldn't tolerate it.

YANBU

i could not cope. I can't stand constant noise. He'd use headphones or move out.

it's a joy living alone, honestly!

I do and then he means and huffs- he drives me crazy 🤦🏻‍♀️

I am seriously considering moving out and I really mean it as I can’t cope with the constant overwhelm.

This would drive me crazy.
Sometimes, often, I need quiet.
Other people's noise, including music, can be a torment.
He doesn't need to impose his noise on you. He has choices and he is being selfish.

Time to live alone.
He no longer cares about you or your comfort.

Can you do that?

This would drive me crazy, genuinely I couldn’t cope.

He uses the headphones! Selfish twit!

Don’t turn it off, change it to something you like and he doesn’t. Do it a lot, to hammer home the point that it’s bloody selfish to inflict your own taste of music on someone else all the time.

This would drive me mad. My DH used to have podcasts playing on his phone at all times - phone in pocket so noise was always coming from him. Took 2 conversations and me listening to a true crime podcast to get him to switch to headphones.

Good luck!

Ask him what his preferred solution is - headphones or you living elsewhere.

I seriously couldn't cope with that. It's beyond selfish. Everybody knows that being forced to endure unwanted noise it's a form of torture.

I couldn't deal with 10 mins of umwanted noise, let alone all the time!

Also, he should look into reducing it for himself too. It's not good to be plugged in constantly. His ears and mind need peace too.

I wouldn't be able to live like that. I need a lot of quiet.

Thanks - you’re right and I agree. Time for a very serious chat about it and if nothing changes then it’s decision time.

I don't understand when people just leave a radio on all the time . Or the TV . My brother does both . I often have to leave as I find it overwhelming. I do like music, podcasts , etc but I wear headphones so as not to inflict my choices on others . I would hate to live like this in my own house . I would keep turning it all off too.

That’s a great idea! 😂

That would drive me mad too. I need silence.

People often suggest earplugs on any thread relating to noise and that’s completely crazy as earplugs do very little.

DH listens to music most of the time but it goes straight from his phone into his hearing aids and I can’t hear a thing.
It is sometimes a bit annoying when I start talking to him and then realise that he can’t me as he’s listening to something but I’d rather that than constant noise.

Sit him down and be very clear that the sensory overload from his music being on constantly on every room all the time is stressing you out and you've gotten to the point you can't bear it. If he's a decent partner, he'll compromise and play his music in the room he's in for a while, then shut it off, or use earbuds or headphones.

If he huffs and puffs, he's selfish and doesn't care that you're stressed by his constant noise level. I mean even when he's not in the room, WTF. Rude.

Then you decide whether you can live like this for the years ahead or not.

Flick off the main switch in the fuse board. Then in the silence tell him to listen to his shite on his headphones or you will keep turning it off.
It's annoying. He's inconsiderate. He's a selfish twat.