Am I being greedy?

[whatintheworld11]

So last year, my SIL borrowed our lawnmower and then just kept it. When I finally asked DH to ask his sister to give it back (she kept ignoring me) as we needed to mow the garden she told him it had actually broken. I was understanding as lawnmowers can break so we left it.

Fast forward to this year, same SIL is asking to borrow the lawnmower again. I’ve absolutely refused politely saying “Didn’t you break the last one we lent you? To be honest I don’t want to give it as I really need to keep the garden tidy for the kids and I can’t keep buying lawnmowers”

I’ve now been accused of being “so greedy, what the hell is wrong with me” that it’s not even my lawnmower because her brother has paid for it (I’m on maternity leave and not working at the minute so DH covering most finances)

I mean DH has even said why have I made such a big deal and let them borrow it?

AIBU to not let them and think they should bloody well buy their own or should I do the neighbourly thing?

considering she broke the last one and didn’t tell you until she was pressed about it, i would never lend her anything again.
Id actually tell her her insulting you just confirms you not wanting to lend it even more

Lend her a pair of scissors.

Tell her that since she didn't replace the other lawnmover you are not taking any chances with her. She's a CF- YANBU

I think you just say it’s in use, and keep saying it. Greed doesn’t come into it. If your husband wants to badly enough, he can go and mow her lawn and bring it back again.

And suggest the extended family club together to buy her her own.

Tell your dh if he wants to lend it to her he can but he needs to get it back within a week so your grass can be cut.

My SIL said my DH was being greedy because he wouldn't pay off her mortgage. They have the same amount of money.

meh. I can’t get fussed about a lawnmower. I would have lent it but said if it breaks she needs to replace it.

Omg I’m aghast that she’s trying to come between you and husbands private affairs - cheeky mare - such a deflection

jus go back with the same reason and keep repeating like a broken record - her and your hubby are trying to gaslight you

If that was the case they would of replaced it the first time.

YA absolutely NBU!

No way should you lend it to her again when she broke it and didn’t even mention the face until asked, and didn’t offer to replace.

Your DH should have your back on this!

Your DH needs to slap down the suggestion that you don’t have any say in it because he paid for it. And he needs to do that very quickly and very firmly. That would be a non negotiable for me, and if he didn’t, then I’d want a full explanation why. You’re his wife, there is no ‘his’ money and ‘your’ money.

I think I would have struggled to have kept my temper after she made comments like that. I’d be inclined to tell her that I initially hadn’t wanted to lend it to her because I didn’t trust her not to break it, lie about it and do fuck all to replace it, but after those little digs, she’d have more chance of me turning up on her doorstep with Alan Titchmarsh than she would of me lending her anything more than a bowl of sugar or the odd loo roll.

She should have replaced the last one!!!

Thank you all! I will stand my ground! She’s been on 2 short breaks since Christmas so I’m sure they can afford one themselves 🙄. Might just say that if this saga bloody continues.

“ Fuck Off “ would suffice

What is she going to do? Borrow it every 2-3 weeks when the grass needs cutting?!

Say no.

The fact she ignored you and made you have to repeatedly ask for your own stuff back would infuriate me.

I would tell her to eat her grass like a cow.

Puts me in mind of a neighbour I used to have who never bought anything. She borrowed my mop and bucket almost daily, I always had to go and ask for it back. It became "the mop", inferring joint ownership. I got so fed up I bought another. Me, my mop and bucket had several blissful weeks together before a request to borrow my mop came because "her bucket" had broken. I said no. Same neighbour once asked to borrow my dining room table and on another occasion I came home to find my garden table and chairs in her garden because they were having a bloody barbecue!!
Then there was the nightly treks down the road with various casseroles, lasagne etc that needed heated in my microwave because here had broken.
Oh! And regularly looking out of the window to see her hanging washing out on my line because hers was full.
I moved house in the course of time and the relief was immense.

send her a link to one of those push along non electric mowers

@ Onelittledog -
After the request to borrow the dining table, I would have tried to keep out of her way; I would have lost it over the garden furniture. As for her washing on my line - I don’t know how you put up with it. I might actually have unpegged it and retuned it wet, leaving her in no doubts as to what I thought.

Oh my goodness! Well I suppose I’m lucky she’s not this bad!

For me it would come down to who does the mowing in my house. My DH does, so if he wanted to lend it, I’d let him get on with it. I know it would annoy him to not get it back so he’d soon stop lending. If it was me, it would be a stern no if I hadn’t got the previous one back, even IF broken!

You’re “greedy” for not lending her your lawn mower after she broke the previous one? She sounds stupid. And like someone who needs to buy her own lawnmower.

Just tell them your current lawn mower is now broken and you need a new one.

Why on earth don't they just get their own? What a faff borrowing a lawn mower FFS.

My response would be ‘If I am the greedy one, how come it is you expecting to help yourself to my lawnmowers?