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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Neighbour harassment

10 replies

downbytheseashell · 18/04/2026 17:48

Would really appreciate some advice because I’m feeling quite shaken and not sure what to do.

I’ve had ongoing issues with my neighbour for a while, lots of shouting, banging on the wall etc, and previously his mum has come round and shouted in my face. I reported it back in January but never really heard anything further.

Today it’s escalated quite badly. My son (primary school age) came into my bed around 4:45am, really quietly, and almost immediately there was shouting through the wall – “fuck off”, “cunt”, “die” – and banging on the bedroom wall which continued then for 45 minutes even though we were silent in bed.

It stopped for a bit and I fell back asleep, but the knocking/banging has basically continued on and off all day. This afternoon a handwritten note was pushed through my door saying I’d “started a war”.

This afternoon it got worse. I saw him through the front window making what looked like a throat cutting gesture at me, followed by aggressive hammering on my front door. I didn’t open it. Since then there’s been more banging on the walls and shouting.

It’s now 6pm. I’m 14 weeks pregnant and it’s just me and my son at home. He’s quietly playing in his room but I feel really on edge and honestly quite scared.

I feel a bit silly calling the police because they must have bigger things to deal with, but equally this doesn’t feel normal and it’s been going on all day and escalating.

Would you call 999 in this situation or 101? Or something else? I don’t want to overreact but I also don’t feel safe.

Thanks in advance.

OP posts:
RuffledKestrel · 18/04/2026 17:50

Yes call the police/999. That's threatening behaviour that is escalating. Tell them everything and that you feel unsafe.

noctilucentcloud · 18/04/2026 17:55

I think it's 101. Unless you feel in immediate danger (eg he's trying to break in) and then it's 999.

MakeMineAMilkyTea · 18/04/2026 18:04

I’d call 101 and I’d also look at getting cctv and a doorbell camera installed if you don’t have it already.

BMW6 · 18/04/2026 18:08

Absolutely call the Police now!

999 because his behaviour is threatening and you are vulnerable with a small child.

Endofyear · 18/04/2026 18:31

I would definitely call the police, he sounds unhinged! Is there anyone who could come and stay over with you and your son tonight? Please do call the police if it's still going on.

Roads · 18/04/2026 18:33

I would absolutely call the police on 999. He sounds completely deranged and likely to escalate especially if you're about to have a new baby. You need to let them know exactly what is happening.

LakieLady · 18/04/2026 18:43

Yes, police. And if you're in social housing, report to the council/HA.

That must have been really frightening.

dentalflosser · 19/04/2026 10:43

Definitely get a door camera and cctv in your back garden too.
That sounds horrible for you OP, I’m so sorry.
I would inform the police as soon as possible, show them the letter and record on your phone any aggression or banging on the walls or door.
Your neighbour is a vile bully, nip this in the bud and hopefully the police could have a word with him.

Hernameisdeborah · 19/04/2026 16:20

This sounds absolutely terrifying. Yes, definitely contact the police. Get a Ring type doorbell and record and keep evidence to log with police. Even if they don’t take immediate action there will still be a record of it. 💐

mantez · 19/04/2026 16:29

Terrifying, I am so sorry for you.

Do you think they know you are alone - or without a male presence in the house? Can you get someone over to hang around a bit, the burlier the better.

I think they are bullying and harrassing you to the brink of violence. I'd definitely call the police, you feel you are in danger from them so why wouldn't you? There could be mental health issues, drink, drugs who knows. You don't know so can only go on your experiences of them.

There are some awful people in the world.

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