To tell school about dd relationship breakdown?

[user1469565563]

Dd17 has been attending a small coed 6th form, in a small northern town. I warned her against getting involved with one of the boys, just in terms of not getting too serious seeing as if they split, she would be in a small environment havingvto see hime daily.

Well this has happened. For background she had a year of EBSA before, and has adhd and autism, but masks brilliantly. We are now under family support from the LA since school got an anonymous top off about her social media activity and safeguarding got involved because of suicidal reposts, likes etc.

She broke down in school having to be in class with this boy she has broken up eith (we've all been there in some form). I have a meeting with school and im worried about her dropping out of school again. Should I mention the relationship breakdown? Part of me doesn't want to get into her business, but a part also thinks school ought to know, for context.

Advice gratefully received.

I'm sure they do know but yes it's worth mentioning.
Remember the pain of a break up at that age.

Absolutely tell them.
I'm a teacher and always welcome information relevant to student's wellbeing.

Yes, you should. Teacher here. We don't move classes for it, but I would make sure kids who've had any kind of disastrous relationship breakdown - friendship or romantic - we're apart in class and not asked to work together at any point. It's helpful to know those kind of dynamics.

That being said, you need to work on your DD's resilience as she's going to have to work at least near people she doesn't like in life.

Yes tell them - I’m not sure there will be a whole heap they can do in regards to them not being in the same class if it’s a small school. However, maybe you can all come up with strategies to help your DD be okish in a class with him and stay in school.

Just to add, I only found out about her episode in class because the subject teacher emailed at the end of the day to tell me about it, and to get my consent to move my dd to a separate room for some classes. The meeting is with the school head and the family worker, so think I will speak about it. I think dd has been incredibly resilient just going into school, given how raw everything is this week.

Agree

@user1469565563 I agree with telling the school. Have you suggested keeping a hand-written diary to your daughter? It may be therapeutic.

What sort of a separate room?

I am not trying to beat you whilst you are worried. But I cannot believe you are even askng this!

Tell them. Absolutely. In fact a must for your DDs safeguarding.

She is already vulnerable. This will upset her.

The school need to know there an additional vulnerability right now so they can keep an extra eye on her (flag quicker if she is mot in class etc...so can pick her up if crying in the loos etc...which given her history is not a good idea for her). Or, if they think they may not be able to keep her safe, they may suggest she stays home.

Thd school will not advertise the break up...they will keep it confidential.

Its a side room just for that subject that they have in common. It was suggested by the teacher, who, of course didn't want her staying at home and not being supervised. School has said she has potential to do really well in this subject.