Aibu Retiring at 55 - 30 years of idleness?

[Scotsknowbest]

So this is the thing: so many local friends have given up working in the last few years in their early to mid 50s, aibu to think what on earth are you going to do to stay interested and interesting?
I thought perhaps they would shut the house up and set off on a big trip but holidays have been more like 2 weeks in Greece instead of one.
I thought perhaps they would volunteer but that seems too restrictive for them.
I thought some might use their professional skills to join executive boards as NEDs or in advisory roles. But no.
Some have upped their golf or tennis, some are focusing on the garden (what, every day?) some walk the dog, read the paper.
I just think they will become so boring!
In contrast I caught up with 3 old school friends this evening who I see about once or twice a year. I asked them when they thought they would retire and each thought mid 60s.
Many of my friends have inherited recently and I think this has been the nudge. I have also inherited but I don't feel any different!
Just for context I am 57, work in 2 roles, one executive, board level, one professional but different area (social work) which takes me to about 4 days a week but I also run 4 properties as a landlord and have an aging dad who lives a mile away who I help with admin, appointments, organising stuff. I also have 2 grown kids the youngest at uni, 1st year. So, not as busy as when I worked and had little kids, but pretty busy in a good way. Personally I can't imagine stopping working so aibu, is 50to55 simply too young to be retiring even if the catalyst has been a windfall inheritance?

How tragic that you can only conceive of your job to make you interested and interesting! I certainly think for the vast majority of people, their paid employment is the least interesting thing about them.

That is one of the smuggest posts I’ve ever read! But even smugger are all those people desperate to tell us how busy they are since they retired-learning languages and designing gardens. Retirement is precisely that-you can do what you want. If that involves binge watching All Creatures Great and Small, it doesn’t make you a lesser person. There is so much judgement over what is the ‘right’ kind of retirement. If you’re lucky enough to be able to decide whether to work or not, just thank your lucky stars you have the choice and focus on your own life rather than what you think others should be doing.

I retired at 55 from a very big job, and following a close bereavement and trying to cope with that at the same time as support DC through it. I was done, burned out and had nothing left to give.

It took me a year to find my rhythm, but now I have two big projects I'm working hard towards and have taken up a competitive sport, which I have a serious focused training plan for.

I do think you need goals and routine, and that can take a while to establish, but I don't expect to be "idle" for 30 years.

@ForCosyLion My job is my lifelong passion and hobby, so anything else does seem boring to me.

Well, that's nice for you, but many people don't love their job and just do it for the money. They may have some other passion that they can't fulfill until the have more time, by ditching their boring job.

I don’t think it’s really about being “too young” — it’s about how differently people define a good life.
From your perspective, being busy, productive and contributing in multiple roles clearly gives you purpose and energy. But not everyone gets that from work in the same way, especially after decades of it. Some people are quite happy to step off the treadmill and just… slow down.
Also, what looks “boring” from the outside (walking the dog, gardening, reading, a bit of travel) can actually feel like a huge luxury if you’ve spent years juggling work, family, and responsibility. Not everyone wants to replace one structured life with another (boards, volunteering etc.).
That said, I do think there’s a middle ground — people who retire very early without any sense of purpose or curiosity might struggle over time. But equally, working into your mid/late 60s isn’t automatically more “interesting” if it’s just habit or identity.
Losing friends in their early 60s really does shift your perspective too. It’s a reminder that having the time and health to enjoy life isn’t guaranteed later.
So no, I don’t think 50–55 is inherently “too young” — but I do think the key question is: what are you retiring to, not just from?

OP lights the touchpaper and then fucks off. Nowt to do with you if people can afford it. I'm in my mid 50s and know of several people my age who have sadly passed away. I'm retiring in no more than a years time.

It's a fine line. My dad took early retirement at 50 when his job became obsolete. That's a year younger than me now, and I can't believe at that young age he was paid for doing nothing (he had an insanely generous non contributory pension). He did a token bit of consultancy, but as his contacts fell away his knowledge became less relevant and this dried up quickly. He didn't have the confidence to find another. He did a bit of volunteering but became very scatty by his early 60s. He lost even more confidence and he and my mum just irritated the hell out of each other. My mum lost all respect for him. At 68 he was diagnosed with dementia and he was dead by 73. I firmly believe his retiring early and doing nothing much contributed to it.

Does seem strange if they retire and just stop doing anything though . Could understand it maybe if they just worked and had no interest in other stuff before

This

Nice if you can retire at 55. My Dad medically retired at 65 and passed away at 67. My Mum was widowed at 62. She has a very busy time looking after our 3yold 1 day a week as well as attending walking group, 2 x running groups, Spanish class, Italian class, church. She also has trips away with us, family and friends. She's considering doing some studying with OU. I think retirement is what you make of it.

my late husband retired at 58, died unexpectedly at 61. I retired just before him in my early 50's so all our retirement plans went down the toilet. It was bloody hard getting used to being alone but I have a reasonably happy life and a life that is as busy as I want it to be. I don't volunteer or do community stuff although I could if I wanted to. I definitely do not. I have no patience or tactfulness left. Personally I think people should keep their beaks out of other people's life choices!

TLDR: no one can rely on even getting to retirement or enjoying any of it when they get there and nobody should make judgement about other people's life choices.

I think its the other way around. He was already developing dementia before it was recognised and this affected his ability to be a consultant and also his confidence. More and more its being recognised that dementia has a long pre diagnosis lead in and the initial signs may not be recognised by those closest to them.

Why would work make you an interesting person? Reading and having many interests makes you an interesting person. I'm not even sure that travel makes someone interesting really. I'd be more interested in someone who knows a lot about local wildlife and history.

You sound quite a boring person to just reel out stupid clichés.

but its all about definition and choice. People might look at my life and think "idle and routineless" but I am doing what I enjoy when I enjoy it. I do have goals but don't work hard at them or want to. I am done, so done, with big projects and competition.

Also, what's wrong with being idle?

I am not even sure that I want to be an interesting person. Further on from that, who gets to decide who is "interesting" and who is not?

Another vote for this.

I plan on retiring at 48.

I want complete control and freedom over my very limited time on earth.

I can't fathom anything less imaginative than assuming work is the only or main way to stave off boredom.

I couldn't give a flying fuck if people think I'm boring after I've retired.

I only have a part-time job (40’s, 4 days a week) so seeing this from a perspective of someone who enjoys their job and still has 3 days off a week with my family/time to get things done and enjoy life!

Retiring in my 50’s seems far too early for me. I enjoy going to work, DH will be working into his 60’s, we want to have nice holidays, help the kids when they start out and we are fit and healthy (so hoping to live a long life - obviously health can never be guaranteed). I can’t imagine not having a routine in my 50’s, I know I thrive off that and like the feeling of work, earning money and then enjoying my time off too.

I occasionally read an ‘epic retirement group’ that pops up on my fb (obviously clicking on it once made it pop up as im not in that age bracket yet!) 😅and lots of people seem to post that they felt abit lost after retiring. I know I like the feeling of having a purpose to the week and then enjoy the change to the weekend or my day off.

However, if work has consumed your life up until your 50’s and you haven’t had the balance i’ve had (I was also able to be a sahm when the kids were little), then alot of people may feel completely burnt out by their 50’s and want to give up work.

Everyone is different but in this day and age, I think it’s more likely more of our friends will be working well into their 60’s than retiring early.

Horses for courses, someone's idea of heaven is another's idea of hell.

So he bullies your poor mother into working nearly 2 decades after she wanted to retire ! I would have no respect for my dad if he was so self centred.

Isnt that just what you find interesting though? Everyone is different.

Ive never had a conversation about local wildlife with my friendship group but we talk about travel, experiences we’ve had around the World, holidays etc all the time. If I started talking about local birds, it certainly wouldn’t be interesting to my friendship group. We’re all different though and that’s why we choose friends usually with some shared interests to our own.

In my opinion (as someone who has friends who enjoy travel), I find all their experiences really interesting to hear about. None of us are really into local wildlife.

I will happily take being considered uninteresting vs slogging myself on my old commute and talking corporate BS all day.

My mum retired at 61 and was so looking forward to being to finally do all the things she wanted to do in her own time at her own pace after working in the NHS, sadly she only got 18 months in and was diagnosed with a progressive neurological disorder and ended up wheelchair bound unable to do even the simplest task and towards the end she could barely move and was unable to speak. She died before she was 70 spending all of that time fighting the progression of the disease. She never had a retirement.

To OP’s point about staying interesting and interested, there’s some evidence that retirement contributes to cognitive decline (beyond the amount you would expect with ageing)- doing a mentally demanding job keeps your brain active and flexible. But it’s not the same for everyone- if your job is less cognitively demanding then the decline will be less (and some people even improve). And what you choose to do instead of working makes a big difference- if you are socially active, involved in goal-oriented activities, volunteering, studying- these are all great for the brain. Conversely if you become socially disengaged you may see greater decline, even if you’re doing lots of gardening, crosswords etc.