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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to feel unwanted when my partner never initiates sex?

2 replies

Cameraobscura89 · 13/04/2026 20:40

My DP (together for 10 years) have always had a good sex life.
However over the past year or so he will not initiate sex with me. Once I initiate it, it’s always good. But I’m starting to feel unattractive and unwanted. I spoke to him about it and he said that at one time I had rejected his advances. So after that it’s put him off trying again.
I can’t even remember this time he speaks about, but he is definitely autistic and adhd although currently undiagnosed…so I don’t know if it’s an extreme case of rejection sensitivity. I have AUDHD too.

Has anyone been in a similar situation?

OP posts:
Cameraobscura89 · 13/04/2026 21:34

Anyone?

OP posts:
itsmeits · 13/04/2026 21:43

You need to talk to him again.
You need to explain that sometimes you may not be in the mood for it. It doesn't mean you don't want him, fancy him.
If that was the case you wouldn't have initiated it after the event

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