At what age can you allow kids to play ‘ out ‘ in garden / front garden on their own while checking every few minutes ?

[justwonde]

My children are 6 and nearly 4.

we have a back garden, which backs onto woodland and a front garden type thing which is a gated cul de sac. There are three houses behind the gate ( ours and two neighbours ) and everyone has a driveway and then the actual private road I guess.

is it OK to let them play out there and out in our back garden on their own and check every 5 minutes or so ? We’ve been burgled before and people climbed over the fence in the back garden which has left a bit of fear for me. We have cctv front and back since then.

I need to clean and cook and can check every few minutes but not sure if I’m being OTT. I’m an anxious person in general. Let me know if I’m being OTT or ok ?

That sounds fine. Mine is 6 and he is allowed out in the gardens (our situation in similar to yours in that we are on a private road) unsupervised. I do check fairly regularly to make sure he is not getting into something he shouldn't. And frequently have to remind him of the rules, but kids need independence.
My only worry, if I were you, is the dynamic between the two kids. Is the younger one going to copy the older one/ are they going to egg each other on etc.
I leave mine unsupervised when he is alone but if he has a friend over, I tend to stalk them around a bit as I know they egg each other on, and if they are out of sight for too long they turn into vandals.

18 if there's a water table ....

If you have sound fences too high for them to get over I would think it was fine in the back garden, not in the front if other families have access there, and people could be moving cars around or coming and going through the gate.

I think if you feel the need to check every few minutes it's pointless. May as well all go in the garden and sit with a cup of tea while they play.

My children are a year older than yours. In our very secure back garden they pretty much have free rein. Have done for a while. Usually if it's nice enough for them to want to be out then the windows and doors are open so I'd hear a yell but I'm not keeping a close eye.

Out the front (quiet cul-de-sac but not gated) I check regularly, couldn't put a number of minutes on it though. We recently moved from a busy city centre to a sleepy northern village and it's lovely to be in a place where children are encouraged to be out on bikes etc and the residents are careful. Unfortunately delivery drivers and contractors not so much. I regularly remind the children about listening for vehicles and what to do if a vehicle approaches. They're not allowed further than the final house on the cul-de-sac so not near to the "main road" (still a quiet residential street).

"Clever never goes" is a good resource to discuss with children in general as well. I find anxiety easier to manage if I take positive steps. I don't want my children growing up anxious but I do want them to be safe and sensible, so we talk about tricky people, road safety, who to ask if you needed help etc. I also remind them they're a team and need to look out for one another. They're not currently ever out of the line of sight or earshot but those years are coming and now feels like a good time to hone being street smart.

Mine were allowed out in the garden without me from about age 4 and were allowed to go to the park across the road from age 6

😆

I'd let them play in the back garden pretty much unsupervised at that age but not sure about the front.

Yeah I’m more relaxed about the back garden for sure. It’s just because we were burgled and they managed to get over the fence. But what are the chances of my children being kidnapped like that from their garden. Very slim I would think.

Back garden sounds more secure, free reign if together but more supervision if 4yo alone. Front garden I'd be out with them.

Our secure back garden, from about age 3-4.
We didn't have a front garden as such, just a gravel driveway, so the kids weren't really interested. Occasionally they want to mosey out the front to play with the stones, watch the world go by, and we let them do that unaccompanied from about age 7.

No random passerby is going to climb a fence and kidnap two children in the middle of the day.

Presume you're kidding re kidnapping, but if not HUGELY UNLIKELY.

Child snatching of random/unrelated kids is vanishingly rare and no one is going to scale a back fence and somehow lug two small kids back over it.

I always remind myself.. if someone kidnapped my kid, they wouldn't be long returning them after the 100 questions a minute. Realistically someone is unlikely to burgle a house when they see a kid in the garden and kidnapping your kids would be very rare...

Back garden sounds fine. I'm not sure I understand the front garden fully... is it a shared garden and there's a road (or long private driveway for the 3 houses) that they could wander onto? If a road I wouldn't let them out unaccompanied.