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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to keep parking partly outside my neighbour's house?

18 replies

Parkingdramallama · 12/04/2026 21:39

So I got a note from my ndn saying they don't like me parking halfway in front of their house and asking me not to park there any more. I'm in a mid terrace and they're an end terrace.

I was a bit disappointed to get this because I hate any sort of confrontation and always try to be quiet and considerate of neighbours. I also struggle with anxiety so this for me is much worse than just coming and asking me nicely.

I don't actually park halfway across their house, the vast majority of my car is across the length of own property but there's a dropped kerb at the very end of where my property stops so I have to park a bit further forward to ensure that is always clear. So this means the nose of my car is about a foot past where my property ends and theirs begins. It is a very small car. I'm in a terrace so have no driveway. Ndn do not drive or own a car. We are also out all day most days unless I'm sick or wfh which is twice a week. Weekends we are always out making the most of it and we're out 7.30-6.30pm the other 3 days of a week when I'm at work. So the car really is not even there that much except overnight.

There are some parking spaces at the back of the houses but there is no footpath the whole way around so in the morning when I'm bringing my toddler out and have my hands full it's very helpful to have the car in front of my house so he can walk beside me and not need to hold hands. It saves me leaving him either alone in the house or alone in the car, and even if I had to leave him, I can still see the car so I feel that's safer, plus its much faster for me to get in and out. Where the parking out the back is, I wouldn't be able to see the car at all if I had to run back into the house and it would take longer as I'd need to walk around the perimeter of the houses on the other side to get there and back again. I do have a back gate but I don't like leaving this unlocked all day which i would need to do if I went out that way.

I automatically went to move the car because I don't want to anger my neighbour but then realised I have nowhere to move it to. I can move it to the same place across the street which I believe will still create the same issues as they said in the note they don't like seeing my car out their window. Plus then my child needs to cross a road in the mornings. Or I need to park away down the street. None of the parking spaces out the back are even available.

I am terrible with confrontation of any sort and am finding it hard to know what to do next. I don't want bad blood with my ndn at all but also I don't really know them as we're not long moved in and I don't want to risk damage to my car by leaving it there incase it escalates. Any advice?

Obviously it's a big enough deal to them to come round with a note so it's clearly bothering them.

So yabu - you need to park somewhere else

Or

Yanbu - keep parking where you are.

OP posts:
BiddlyBipBipBeeBop · 12/04/2026 21:41

Ignore them

Bunnyfuller1 · 12/04/2026 21:42

If you have tax and an MOT she can do one - unless it’s allocated places

MyPeppyCat · 12/04/2026 21:42

YANBU at all. They sound absolutely ridiculous.

SalmonOnFinnCrisp · 12/04/2026 21:42

This is so long but it sounds like your car is legally parked?
And they dont even own a car? And if they did thry could still park it?

I'd go and speak to them and explain you are legally parked and will continue to legally park. Id try and understand their issue to be neighbourly but sounds a bit bonkers.

ThisChirpyFox · 12/04/2026 21:45

If you're struggling with anxiety, which will make it difficult to speak to them, is there another adult in your house that can do it on your behalf?

I wouldn't ignore as they'll just keep leaving notes and get more pissed off.

If you can, you be proactive and rather than waiting for them to bring it up knock on theirs door and say there is no where else to park and you pay road tax and will continue to park it there.

If it was me I'd tell them if they didn't want to look at my car they might want to consider moving as my car will continue to park there.

SwanRivers · 12/04/2026 21:45

Sorry I ended up skimming a lot of it because that was an awful lot of over explaining about your legally parked car, especially when your neighbours don't even own one.

YANBU but you know that clearly.

Divebar2021 · 12/04/2026 21:46

They don’t like seeing your car out their window?? 😂. I absolutely hate seeing cars parked outside my window also but I know I’m unreasonable and I would never in a million years leave a note about it.

TheQueenOfTheNight · 12/04/2026 21:47

They're only doing this because they see you as meek or overly nice. They wouldn't do this to a trucker. If you capitulate, they could just become more certain that they own the road. Don't encourage them to behave this way.
Treat them like toddlers. If they speak to you about it, say that you're legally parked, ask questions that they'll have to say "no" to, like "am I blocking your drive?"

Flexisynes · 12/04/2026 21:48

The only thing you're being unreasonable about is the lack of diagram!
They don't own the road in front of their house. If you're not blocking a dropped kerb, they can jog on!

Parkingdramallama · 12/04/2026 21:51

ThisChirpyFox · 12/04/2026 21:45

If you're struggling with anxiety, which will make it difficult to speak to them, is there another adult in your house that can do it on your behalf?

I wouldn't ignore as they'll just keep leaving notes and get more pissed off.

If you can, you be proactive and rather than waiting for them to bring it up knock on theirs door and say there is no where else to park and you pay road tax and will continue to park it there.

If it was me I'd tell them if they didn't want to look at my car they might want to consider moving as my car will continue to park there.

No I live alone with my toddler which is why the getting out in the morning is a faff with one set of hands, and why I don't like leaving the back gate unlocked all day. My ex is a piece of work and knowing the house is secure and my car is visible on my ring doorbell out the front is important to me even though he's not shown up since we've been here. I don't really want to have to explain all that though because talking about it is embarrassing.

Technically one of the spaces out the back probably is for my house but they're not numbered as such and parking is competitive as there are more houses looking into the back parking than there are spaces available.

OP posts:
Parkingdramallama · 12/04/2026 21:52

TheQueenOfTheNight · 12/04/2026 21:47

They're only doing this because they see you as meek or overly nice. They wouldn't do this to a trucker. If you capitulate, they could just become more certain that they own the road. Don't encourage them to behave this way.
Treat them like toddlers. If they speak to you about it, say that you're legally parked, ask questions that they'll have to say "no" to, like "am I blocking your drive?"

They don't know me they've just said hello once. I literally never ever run in to them.

OP posts:
TheQueenOfTheNight · 12/04/2026 21:57

Even if they've just seen you and said hello once, that's enough to form an opinion of how easy you'll be to manipulate. As I said before, they wouldn't do this if you were a trucker.
It's probably a good idea to work on your assertiveness anyway, as it'll stand you and your child in good stead. Once you start to stand up for yourself and your child it gets easier, like with anything else that we're initially uncomfortable about.
Do not park elsewhere. It's your home and your safety and comfort are important.

BiddlyBipBipBeeBop · 12/04/2026 22:08

You don’t owe them an explanation. If you don’t want to just ignore them, keep it simple. Tell them that you are parked legally and due to your personal circumstances it is not convenient for you to park elsewhere. Also if you didn’t park there, chances are someone else would take the space anyway. They’ll just have to lump it. Be calm and politely assertive, stick up for yourself.

Bristolandlazy · 12/04/2026 22:13

They're idiots, they should be embarrassed. Don't do anything, if they're bothered they can knock on your door and you can explain. I can't see why they care where you park.

Adelle79360 · 12/04/2026 22:25

I would ignore it, pretend I never got the note if they knocked on my door, and I would explain that the road outside is unrestricted and I will continue to park there. Honestly people need to stop being so unhinged. You are not unreasonable OP and you do not owe them any explanation about your child etc.

ArtAngel · 12/04/2026 22:43

They are being beyond ridiculous.

Ignore.

If they say anything act surprised and explain that you can’t park further back and you didn’t think it was an issue as your car is taxed and legal so allowed to be parked anywhere not on double yellows.

BeAmberZebra · 12/04/2026 22:44

All the comments are absolutely correct. No one has rights over the area outside their house. However while illogical and unreasonable many people do get annoyed having to look out their window at someone else’s car. There may also be practical reasons such as ensuring their visitors, delivery people, doctors etc can easily park or it’s obscuring light or a variety of little inconveniences all of which you will not be aware of. For reasons I won’t go into many people park outside my house and while I know I have no rights and wouldn’t actually say anything I get a slightly irritated feeling when I see a car there particularly when I know someone coming to see me has to park a good distance away especially when they are bringing young children. However in your circumstances you need to just do what you’ve been doing and live with your neighbours irritation which they are perfectly entitled to feel. It’s part of modern living that many houses were built with no idea what future parking needs would be.

Parkingdramallama · 12/04/2026 22:50

BeAmberZebra · 12/04/2026 22:44

All the comments are absolutely correct. No one has rights over the area outside their house. However while illogical and unreasonable many people do get annoyed having to look out their window at someone else’s car. There may also be practical reasons such as ensuring their visitors, delivery people, doctors etc can easily park or it’s obscuring light or a variety of little inconveniences all of which you will not be aware of. For reasons I won’t go into many people park outside my house and while I know I have no rights and wouldn’t actually say anything I get a slightly irritated feeling when I see a car there particularly when I know someone coming to see me has to park a good distance away especially when they are bringing young children. However in your circumstances you need to just do what you’ve been doing and live with your neighbours irritation which they are perfectly entitled to feel. It’s part of modern living that many houses were built with no idea what future parking needs would be.

They have their own driveway and still enough room to fit another car in front of their house. In fact they often have a visitor who parks in front of my car in front of their house and leaves their drive empty. So plenty of space to park 2/3 cars at their house if they needed to even with mine where it is.

I'm trying to understand their view point in that respect but I'm struggling.

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