Snap chat for teens

[Chickencuddle]

My dd is 13. She got her first phone almost 2 years ago. I allowed her Snapchat after she had it for around 6 months because she begged and begged me. All her friends had it etc. I felt bad that all her friends talked and she was being left out.
I dont use it so didn't properly know how had it can be.
Now its my own fault and stupidity but I regret letting her have it. I dont like the fomo vibes which she gets from watching friends stories and comparisons. I dont like the constant chats coming through and the fact she would rather be on Snapchat than watching a movie or something.
I dont like ghe fact shes added to groups with people she either doesnt or barely knows. Its hard to monitor without invading privacy and I feel conflicted.
Now she got a new phone for her birthday (the other phone was a very old one of mine and not working very well. Will now go to her younger brother for when he starts high school)

Do I let her have Snapchat or not? What are people's thoughts and opinions.
I know she will be devastated as she is used to having it and she will feel excluded from her friendship group. It is true that none of them even use numbers or messages etc.

Given all the potential harm your DD could be exposed to on Snapchat I think you are taking a great risk with her safety if you allow her to use it.
Whether her friends parents allow this or not is not your problem. Your concern should be the welfare of your DD

Thank you. Cab you tell me more about the potential harm. I find it hard to put into words. Im not the best at talking I know what I want to say but things get jumbled in my head and I worry im wrong and I worry she will come to harm also from not having it. As she won't be in contact with her friends. And her friends will be in contact with each other.

I did not immediately allow either DC to have snapchat or TikTok. I explained why. I said i they felt it was compromising their social life I would reconsider. DS1 installed snapchat aged 17 because he was missing out on invites as that was the main platform for his friends

This is what im worried about. Once I was dropping off her and her friend (ive known this friend since she was 4) somewhere and I asked for dds friends number so I could call them as dd didnt have her phone. She didnt know her number and had no idea how to find it and said she only uses Snapchat. All her friends do thats how they all communicate. I dont like Snapchat but also dont like the thought of her being segregated from her friends and struggling to communicate with anyone while they're chatting away.

My 13 year old DD is not allowed Snapchat. It is a dangerous app and I won’t be relenting on it anytime soon. She can dislike it as much as she wants - I’ve explained why and she’s smart enough to understand. I wouldn’t let your DD have it - stand your ground, you are the parent.

You are absolutely not invading her privacy by checking her phone. That is something every parent should be doing.

My 14 year old doesn’t have Snapchat. Her two best friends do but happily have WhatsApp chats etc with her. A girl across the road from us found a ‘boyfriend’ more than twice her age on Snapchat and he was about to meet up with his 13 year old ‘girlfriend’ when the mum found out. Inappropriate pictures had already been shared… it’s too easy to add strangers on it.

My 17 year old has deleted almost every app from his phone because he felt it was affecting his concentration so we are mostly Luddites here now, and I do prefer it tbh

Snapchat, tiktok and discord are the main reasons for governments (including ours) bringing in sm bans for children. These platforms are full of predators targeting and grooming children, and they use these purely because parents think they are fun and safe and teenager-ish (despite having autodelete functions). Governments are stepping in because parents won't.