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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Can’t decide whether this is empowering or a little bit sad

68 replies

Blondiebeachbabe · 12/04/2026 20:47

Kids left home 10 years ago. I text alot but they’re not great at keeping in touch. DH works shifts and left today at 1pm, and will get home around midnight. So, another night alone for me. I thought sod it, I’m going to have take-out. I ordered a meal for one from the Chinese. Quite expensive I thought at £9. Anyway, not a problem, I can afford it. Went along and felt a bit weird coming out with a bag with one container inside! Ate the meal and washed it down with wine. I can’t decide if this is the epitome of lushness, or if it’s all a bit sad that I’m doing this alone. 😵‍💫

OP posts:
Chocaholick · 12/04/2026 20:48

Op, enjoy it! Think of all those times dinner was scraping baked beans off the floor and out of a toddler’s hair.

ZippyPeer · 12/04/2026 20:49

Personally think that sounds delightful!

PizzaInTheBath · 12/04/2026 20:51

Enjoy the peace and getting to eat exactly what you want. I've always thought it's more sad to sit home alone, eating rubbish food. Get the take away, enjoy a solo trip to the cinema, enjoy a weekend break doing what you want

Catlady007007 · 12/04/2026 20:52

I think your take out food was remarkably cheap!!!

PottingBench · 12/04/2026 20:54

Sounds like bliss.

Dreamcatcherat50 · 12/04/2026 20:55

I think it's the epitome of lushness but we're all in different places and situations.

Did it actually make you feel sad or did you question it because you're not used to doing things for or by yourself?

Watchoutfortheslowaraf · 12/04/2026 20:55

Sounds lovely to me and not too expensive

notacooldad · 12/04/2026 20:56

It wouldn't cross my mind to think its empowering or sad.
Its just food and drink.

Original poster
Blondiebeachbabe · 12/04/2026 20:56

Thanks guys!!

OP posts:
CurdinHenry · 12/04/2026 20:56

I don't understand why this is remarkable...

NoYouCantComeToTheWedding · 12/04/2026 20:58

£9 is cheap for a Chinese meal! But yeah, there's nothing particularly empowering about ordering a takeaway... Confused

zantez · 12/04/2026 20:59

How could anyone worry about a 9 quid takeaway? Is Puritanism ingrained or what. It's not lush, it's normal.

If your DH was at home alone while you were out, do you think he would agonise over something like this? Or would he forbid you to leave him home alone in the first place!

insomniac1 · 12/04/2026 21:01

Lush!!!!!! Sounds like bliss x

whatradiatorstopick · 12/04/2026 21:02

For one take aways are great! The absolute epitome of a treat….i don’t do it often. But when I do it feels like a “secret” which is stupid, because it isn’t? I love it though 🥰
And bugger off to the people being mean!

Crunched · 12/04/2026 21:02

Why only one container? I get two and a bag of prawn crackers minimum!
I think the fact you mention your adult DC aren't great at keeping in touch points to you feeling lonely and this is a separate issue. A takeaway for one is not.

PoppySaidYesIKnow · 12/04/2026 21:04

If I have the house to myself I usually treat myself to a takeaway. Followed by a period drama on iplayer, and some crochet. It’s my perfect evening, but I am aware that this is occasional, so a treat. For others who are alone all the time, they may have a different view.

TheChosenTwo · 12/04/2026 21:04

It’s just food. And I’d have got it delivered. And it would definitely have cost more than £9! And although it would have been for one person the delivery driver would definitely thought it was for a family of 4 🤭
Chinese is my Achilles heel of takeaways and I always massively over order for maximum options.
im going with lush, not as a term of overindulgence but as a signal of a really nice thing to do of a solo Sunday evening.

ThatFairy · 12/04/2026 21:05

I often eat takeaways alone... I'm alone all the time as well. I'm a single mum and my 18 year old stays at his partner's most nights the last few months. I really feel like I need something to do. I think I just made my whole life about being a mum, didn't date, lost touch with friends. I want to try to turn things around for myself this year

DreamingOfGeneHunt · 12/04/2026 21:08

Sounds marvellous to me.

Original poster
Blondiebeachbabe · 12/04/2026 21:11

We get take aways a lot! At least once a week. It was more about just getting a dish for one. As I don’t normally do it alone. Felt good in that I can affford it. But also a bit sad thinking back to all the times I came out with a huge bag because the kids were still at home. I maybe haven’t articulated myself very well. That’ll be the wine 😂

OP posts:
Original poster
Blondiebeachbabe · 12/04/2026 21:12

ThatFairy · 12/04/2026 21:05

I often eat takeaways alone... I'm alone all the time as well. I'm a single mum and my 18 year old stays at his partner's most nights the last few months. I really feel like I need something to do. I think I just made my whole life about being a mum, didn't date, lost touch with friends. I want to try to turn things around for myself this year

Bless you xx

OP posts:
Rhaidimiddim · 12/04/2026 21:16

Embrace the freedom, get used to doing things on your own, for yourself! You've done your mum shift - time to change gear and embrace the sweet-and-sour dinner for one.

ThePoshUns · 12/04/2026 21:17

Sounds lush. I’m home alone next weekend I might do the same!

SeaGardening · 12/04/2026 21:19

Sounds wonderful! Enjoy the freedom.

ThisGreenUser · 12/04/2026 21:20

I live on my own and had a Dominos for one this evening! Don’t often get takeaways but it really hit the spot.