AIBU to suggest babysitting to my 13-year-old daughter?

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My dd is 13 and is keen to start earning some money. At her age I was babysitting every weekend, but I’m unsure if that’s the done thing now? What are the chances people these days that would be ok with a 13 yr old babysitter? I think if she sticks to our estate then I will be around in an emergency too?! What you think? AIBU to suggest it to her?

The problem is if you’re using people who you don’t know then it could do harm. If she was looking after a child or pet she didn’t know with no insurance, qualifications etc and something went wrong… it could do a lot of harm.

Posters are responding as if the op is forcing her to work! It’s literally in the first line of the op that it’s the dd who is keen to do this! No idea why you’d stifle that.

So maybe OP's daughter does not have an allowance, or wants to supplement it. I think a thirteen year old wanting to earn some money is admirable.

Yeah tbf. I would only let her babysit in the estate we live in. So it wouldn’t be far away. But i thought of those situations, she could panic so will leave it for a year or so

No law about the age, but ultimately a parent (either yours or the parents of the kids she's babysitting) would be legally responsible if anything happened and could be done for leaving her and the younger kids she was babysitting alone.

I have a 13 year old. I leave him home alone happily but wouldn't want him babysitting because I don't think it would be fair to put him in the situation of having to make decisions if something happened. We have godchildren aged 6 and 8 and he's brilliant with them, and they love and respect him, but there's no way I'd want him feeling like he was responsible if one of them was injured in his care. If we were babysitting, and we needed milk say, I might pop to the local shop and leave him in charge, but I'd be 20 mins max and definately wouldn't want to be longer.

I would love to know why this has changed so much. I was babysitting at 14. And was babysat by a teenager myself. It was completely normal when I was young. Why has it become to be seen as such a ridiculous proposition?? What bad actually changed? Did my parents actually make horrible decisions that put us at risk or are actually the risks extremely small and we’re now all just a bit over anxious?? I’ve never needed to use a babysitter outside of family but I think I’d let a sensible 14 year old sit in my house while my children were asleep.

Yeah so much has changed, i was working in a crèche the summer I was 16. It was a drop off crèche in a shopping centre. I bloody loved it 😅

14 year olds definitely still do. Both my dds did

i think there’s a big maturity jump from 13 to 14. For me, 13 feels like the end of the little kids era, but 14 is the start of young adult era

I was about that age when I started babysitting, maybe 14, and it was every Friday and Saturday night, until the parents came staggering home after chuck out time.

Things are different now. I doubt you'd get any parent letting a 13/14 year old babysit then wave them off into the night to walk home

Depends on the 13 year old and the child they are looking after. My DD had her first baby sitting gig at this age - she was doing afterschool care for a 5/6 year old whilst mum took the older brothers to football. DD made the little girl supper, supervised her reading, played with her and got her into bed then got on with her homework until the others came home. All fine. On the back of that she was offered quite a bit of other work but I drew the line at pre schoolers.

Other ways to make money at that age include pets as mentioned, car washing, cleaning garden furniture, helping out at parties and sewing in name tapes to school uniform (which is a good one as you can do it in front of the TV...)

They have that now they are adults,they didn’t have to work at 13 to get it

If you have friends with children, who know your daughter is sensible, they might let her babysit. I’d be surprised if anyone would let a 13 year old that they don’t know properly babysit for their children though.

My niece used to look after a friend of families cat when they were away. She’d feed the cat twice a day, change the litter and give it company for an hour or so for £20 a day. Maybe neighbours might be willing to pay her for that?

Each to their own

I think you’ve misread this thread given a few of your rather defensive comments. No one is forcing this 13yr old to work. She WANTS to.

Hmmm we’ve used two 14 yr old sisters (twins) several times when just going down the road for a meal or drink. I’d only ever leave mine with an adult if I was going out of town to more than 10 mins away.

Maybe give it a year and then see if you can get the word round around friends of friends etc. I babysat kids at 14 and was very sensible!

I think 13yr olds today seem young to be left unsupervised with young children. But i think there probably is demand to supervise children 330-530 whilst a WFH parent takes calls or works in peace. She could prepare a snack, stop the children disturbing the parent. Perhaps support some spellings or a school reading book. Play some games or supervise time in the garden. I think parents might find this very useful!

I wouldn't have a 13 year old babysit my kids personally. I don't even let my 14yo stepson mind his 2yr old brother unless we are in the house or he is just out in the garden (I might pay him to entertain the toddler so me or DH can get some jobs done, but we are always around).

However like a PP suggested, our 14 year old neighbour walks and feeds our dog if we are out for the day and my DSS does so for our other neighbours cat when they are away.

I have also paid a 15 year old female neighbour (who has 3 younger siblings) to play with my toddler outside or in the house whilst I was painting the house previously. So maybe in the summer holidays it could be something in your estate to help out parents going stir crazy 😂

I’m sorry but the way this has escalated into “a 13-year-old babysitting is basically illegal” is genuinely unhinged 😭

I was out here at 8 walking three dogs at once, babysitting my own siblings by 9, and watching other people’s kids at 11and somehow none of us required a rescue operation or legal intervention. We survived. The children survived. The dogs, incredibly, also survived.

Meanwhile now it’s like:

“I’m not sure a 13-year-old can be trusted to supervise a goldfish without a risk assessment.”

Also the NSPCC recommends ≠ it’s illegal leap is doing acrobatics. A recommendation is guidance, not a criminal statute. No one is getting arrested because a teenager handed out snacks and put a kid to bed.

And the dog thing really sends me. Kids can compete in Junior Showmanship from nine years old —handling, presenting, controlling a dog in a judged environment—but walking a dog around the block at 13 is suddenly too dangerous unless there’s a chaperone hiding behind a hedge?

Be serious.

Same energy with the “12-year-olds need babysitters unless it’s daytime” discourse. At 12 they’re in middle school, have phones, can feed themselves, and somehow manage to exist for 7 hours a day at school without a personal bodyguard. But being in their own house for an evening? Immediate crisis.

And yes, I’ve let my 7-year-old stay home alone for short periods. Call the police, alert the press. He’s not performing open-heart surgery, he’s sitting on the couch with snacks.

Not everything is a catastrophe. Some of you have confused “basic, age-appropriate independence” with “endangerment,” and it shows. Kids don’t wake up on their 16th birthday with fully installed life skills like it’s a software update. They learn them gradually—by actually being trusted to do things.

But sure. Next up: 14-year-olds making toast unsupervised—straight to jail 🔥🍞🚨

16 years is a recommendation. Not a law.

I wouldn’t hire a 13 year old.
18 year old minimum qualified with a DBS

I was babysitting at 13. I think times have really changed though, I wouldn't have a 13 year old babysitting my DC and as far as I know none of my friends have had teenagers babysitting either.

You didn’t know it cos it isn’t true 😂

Exactly what I was going to say.

I'm wondering the same as I read this thread, I was babysitting for five families at 13, with children ranging from months old to only a couple of years younger...4 in our village and a family friend of one of the families...I loved that one as they were rich as Croesus, (in fact they were all very well off) it was always an overnight so I got a comfy bed, full breakfast and posh ride home next lunchtime lol

I'm not sure when we started infantilising teenagers so much...I'm only GenX myself

I'm sure not every child is mature enough to do it at that age and that would be up to both sets of parents but yes, I'd love to know when it all changed, and I don't think it's for the better and children are any safer for it either

You asked why a 13 year old would want money and then said your DC had allowances. So everyone seems to be agreed that teenagers need some money.