AIBU to not want my dad to babysit?

[Martiniolives]

My mum and dad sometimes offer to baby sit my 15 month old but the idea makes my stomach knot up.

My dad wasnt weird with me as a kid directly (well, he did weird stuff like watch porn om the laptop in communal areas and come into the bathroom when id be in the bath..). But he never molested me or anything. But as i got older, when i was an adult, weird things would happen. Hed touch my bum after rubbing my back or hugging me. He introduced me to a friend and they both made it very clear theyd been discussing me and my looks prior. Recently i stayed with my parents and he was in the guest room so when i walked in in a towel post shower he was there. He apologised but he knew so?

I havent ever told anyone this not even my husband as im scared it would ruin our family and i suppose i dont want to even think about it. But your dad touching your bum while youre going through a traumatic event (my dog just died he met us at the vets)... thats not on is it?

Anyway, sorry im venting now. That was many years ago and i have a daughter now. I should never ever leave her with him right? I dont know how to broach this. My nephews love him and are often with him and he never seems to act weird but.. it gets my heckles up and my stomach starts to hurt. I dont know.

Your instinct to keep your child away from them is 100% right, you're only questioning it because of social conditioning. I completely get it, and it's so hard. But that warning voice in your head is right, and it's there for a reason. Somebody should have done it for you as a child and it's awful that they didn't. You need to be that person for your child now.

If your husband is a kind man who supports and loves you, you may feel a huge weight lifted from your shoulders if you tell him. I did.

Best of luck to you 💐

op you need to protect your child and you need to tell your brother/sister and start protecting your nephews

Oh my dear, you say your dad was never weird with you but he was. He did abusive things to you - I’m not surprised you feel off about him babysitting. Trust your gut and say no.

This

and tbh what you said about walking in when in the bath or touching bum was the start and too much

Imagine for a second you don't tell your DH and there's an emergency and your DH leaves your DD with your DH without knowing. It's not a chance I'd take.

Stick to your instincts OP.
To help you keep your safe.

You are on the right yrack.

Do not trust him alone with your baby.