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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Will I look like a stalker

7 replies

KindGoldBear · 09/04/2026 01:27

I went out on Saturday night and met a lovely man. Talked to him all night and he said some lovely things. I'd actually had brief chats with him in the past, but this was the first time we'd spent the whole evening together. I felt there was a real spark there and my friends could see it too.
I left earlier than planned & we said we'd see each other at the next club night. Which I now cannot go to. I'm sure he'll be there at future club nights though.
He's not on Facebook but I've found his mate, who leaves nothing private. I know he'll post photos of the event.
Would I look like a stalker if I liked the photos or commented, in the hope his mate tells him I've commented & he replies back? Or should I just see what happens when we next meet again.
We don't know each others surnames or relationship status's yet.
He could have asked for my number, but didn't. If he was that bothered about seeing me at the next event then surely he would have asked for my number before I left.
Can you tell I'm out of practice meeting new people...

OP posts:
BuffetTheDietSlayer · 09/04/2026 01:31

I think you’ll probably just come across as desperate and an easy shag.

Go to the next event and see what happens.

kkloo · 09/04/2026 01:33

Definitely don't do that, just wait to see if anything happens when you see him again.

Katflapkit · 09/04/2026 01:37

kkloo · 09/04/2026 01:33

Definitely don't do that, just wait to see if anything happens when you see him again.

Do not message the friend or post anything on his Facebook. It would be so off putting.

It's not the end of the world, if he is looking for you, wondering if you are. You've waited this long.

KindGoldBear · 09/04/2026 01:37

@BuffetTheDietSlayer & @kkloo thank you, I won't make contact. I've been tempted but my inner instinct said don't.

OP posts:
CamillaMcCauley · 09/04/2026 01:46

Just go to the next club night that you can and see how things evolve. Anything else is creating drama and trying to force something, which isn’t attractive.

Okaylie · 09/04/2026 01:50

Agree, just go to the next event that you are able to.

moderate · 09/04/2026 02:00

You could have asked for his number, but didn't. If you were that bothered about seeing him at the next event then surely you would have asked for his number before he left.
I can tell you’re out of practice meeting new people... 😉

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