To have expected improvement in sleep as DD approaches three?

[biackbirdsinging]

I have two children.

DS (now age five) was not a great sleeper. A large part of that was probably my fault as I didn’t know what to expect with babies so didn’t know things like contact naps were normal. Eventually did sleep training at 18 months; he wasn’t left to cry but the first night did involve tears. But it worked and he more or less slept through since. He did wake very very early though but even this stopped at around two and a half. Now he’s great: goes to bed between 730 and 8, sleeps through, wakes around 7 in the morning.

Then I have DD who turns three in July. She’s why I’m posting. Initially she seemed a much better sleeper than ds but teething at 7 months knocked her off kilter and since then erratic is the only word I can think of to sum her up. She’ll have phases of sleeping OK - usually still waking at least once - and phases of waking several times a night. At the moment she’s waking very early but sometimes wakes very late.

I guess the thing is it is getting me down now as she always does wake. And even friends of mine with very poor sleepers noted an improvement around age 3; we’re only three months away (although I appreciate this can be a long time in child-world) and it’s still all over the place and honestly I am tired of it.

When I’ve tried to sleep train using similar strategies we were given for ds it just hasn’t worked. And since she’s relatively easy to resettle once she’s woken up if seemed a bit sledgehammer to crack a nut (this was the thing with ds; he would wake up and then be utterly hysterical if you tried to get him back to bed.)

She doesn’t typically nap now but sometimes if she wakes very early she will nod off for a bit in the car. She’s always awake before 2pm though, preferably 130.

She is still in a cot but the move to a bed is pressing. I don’t know whether this will improve things or make it worse.

Co sleeping is absolutely not an option. She doesn’t sleep at all and things it’s playtime and to be honest I don’t like it either.

I guess what I’m asking is when did your poor sleeper improve? Worried about being told ‘never’ …

Around 3 will mean some will be a little earlier and some a little later, I think, so I think she’ll get there soon. I do think she’s old to be in a cot. Lots of emphasis on having own bed, lucky her, lovely new bedding and a grow clock type thing may help. After the bed transition she’ll probably sleep even worse for a couple of weeks but I bet it will improve things long term.

Also, any chance of overtiredness causing the wake ups? Could she have an earlier bedtime at all? I agree any kind of harsh sleep training will probably worsen the problem

I do think she has been worse this holiday and possibly overtired but it’s difficult addressing it. She was in bed at 650 last night: she’d been up since 6, no nap - but then was awake at half four (in fairness this is VERY unusual.) I managed to persuade her to listen to her Tonie box and got though to 6 but she kept calling for me in that time.

The cot is a cot bed. I transitioned her from her sleeping bag to a duvet recently and sleep has been worse since then so I’m loath to introduce the bed … I’ll have to eventually I know. But I guess I’m hoping to get her to a point she can be reasoned with! She’s also recently potty trained so I don’t know if it’s jus lots of changes.

With my son I worried when he was starting school how he would cope as he’d be so tired given he was a poor sleeper so he definitely was still bad at 4 and a half. My mum had the same stress about me when I was starting school. So some children definitely take longer to settle into having a normal full night’s sleep.