Do nursing staff not wash patients anymore or change sheets?

[keepswimming38]

My daughter has been admitted to hospital with meningitis. She’s on an infectious diseases ward. I’ve been by her side most of the day for 3 days and despite her not being able to move as she is so weak, not one nurse has asked her if she wants to freshen up, have a wash, change her sheets. I’ve done it for her. Is this usual? The nurses are sat next to their little computer trolleys, or chatting at nurses station, so not all run off their feet I would say.

I hope your daughter makes a swift and full recovery, OP x

My late wife (same-sex relationship if relevant) spent sometimes lengthy periods in hospital prior to her death. Whenever she was on an oncology ward, visiting was 10am-8pm and I would be permitted onto the ward at 9:30 am to support her with her personal care. While we were in the bathroom, staff would also leave clean sheets and I would change the bed when we returned. It was very much expected that if patients had regular visitors who stayed for a long time those visitors would help, and tbh why wouldn’t you? When your loved one is in hospital you feel so helpless, I was glad of opportunities to actually do something useful.

Another with a bad post-natal experience here. Five days in hospital with the same blood stained sheets, it wasn’t just a bit either. One nurse said she’d change them when I asked and then I didn’t see her again! I’ve spent a fair bit of time on various wards. Some were excellent, nurses were clearly very busy. Others were terrible. That postnatal ward was abysmal.

I spent 2 1/2 weeks in hospital and cannot fault the care and attention I received. The bed changing was daily and personal hygiene also overseen by the HCAs who also served and collected meal trays. The nurses dispensed medicines, changed dressings,etc. The ward I was on ran like clockwork.

@allthingsinmoderation I don’t disagree that you shouldn’t have to ask for basic care for yourself - but in my recent personal experience, it was the only way to get personal care - and if they haven’t provided it so far in OPs daughters stay, it’s probably worth someone stepping in to ask. I did find that the nurses I had were more amenable if it was me requesting my own care rather than when my family stepped in, so that’s why I asked.

I was in hospital for two weeks all the nurses did was give out the meds and update doctors. My bed was changed once and my dh or a hca took me to shower (not at all for the first week as I couldn’t walk)

I have an adult child with a chronic illness who has spent time in hospital on many occasions. I agree with you, nursing staff don't seem to assist with washing, bathing, help to clean teeth anymore. A person who has a catheter, and a cannula or 2 can't physically carry out those essentials, but it seemed no one was prepared to assist. Changing a t shirt to feel cleaner wasn't something I could do because of the cannula, so it wasn't done. The basics seem to be forgotten. I hope your daughter recovers soon.

Why on earth can't you change your tshirt with a cannula in

Hca’s generally change sheets, wash patients unable to wash themselves and move patients from bed chair, when nurses are at computers they are completing all the necessary paperwork often the kind to get their patients discharged with care packages, my nurse friend says this takes up a huge amount of time and half her ward shouldn’t even be in hospital now but they can’t safely discharge

I wouldn't expect to for reasons of safety. I'm not trained in lifting techniques, or dealing with cannulas etc. I would not have expected nursing staff to walk in and do my job with no training, I'm not a nurse so should not be expected to be one in a hospital.

I was left in sheets covered in blood on the postnatal ward too. Also a catheter that was about to overflow when a physio came round with a leaflet and managed to find a staff member who resentfully dealt with it.

I’m very sorry OP to hear that those standards and attitudes seem to be spreading.

when my dad was in hospital before he died the only person to offer him a drink outside of meal times was a HCA (once. In two days). He was never offered a wash.

I was in st Thomas’ a couple of years ago (big teaching hospital - the home of modern nursing practice, Florence Nightengale etc) and I was festering in a dirty hospital gown and bloodied sheets. A matron (or senior sister or whatever the appropriate title is for big boss nurse!) came by the ward and was pretty annoyed at the state of me. She didn’t leave until the HCAs had changed my bed and helped me into a new gown.

i got the impression that keeping patients clean and comfortable is still part of the JD but will be shirked by some if possible.

On my ward we changed beds daily and everyone was either assisted or prompted to wash daily. It’s basic nursing care to ensure everyone has the opportunity or is offered the help they need.

Yes her family member has stepped in her mother is her family member and she is advocating for her daughter.

Edit to add. I think mum wants to find out what the norms are, should in case she needs to escalate. Also imagine those that don't have a family member to change their sheets and bath them and are way too poorly to ask. Quite sad

I wash my patients daily and change sheets. Clean teeth and give the ladies a soap filled shower cap for those who can’t wash their hair in the shower. Also brush teeth and hair. Wishing your DD a speedy recovery.

Assuming it was hooked up to a drip so you wouldn't be able to get your arm out

staffing issues
i remember a nurse saying there was one commode for the whole ward,
terrible

You asked if she was bed bound, yes. But you also made a fairly inconsiderate statement that a 20 year old in hospital with meningitis should be able to advocate for herself.
It's the statement, not the question, people are having a problem with.

Let’s not forget what healthcare staff are paid as well. The same as kitchen staff and cleaners. I just found this comparison website. https://nhstakehomepaycalculator.co.uk/guides/nhs-band-2-pay-national-living-wage-2026/#band-2-monthly-take-home-pay-2026-27-england

Talk to them op, maybe they think she can’t manage the movement and it has to be organised sadly yes she may have been overlooked, I doubt it’s that nurses don’t wash or change sheets

In Scotland they do, mostly by the HCAs but the nurses usually pitch in too.

In England not so much, my dad was admitted having had a TIA and was given no help at all to shower or to eat. I don't know about a bed bath. This was 5 years ago so hopefully things have improved..

Nursing care sure isn’t what it used to be. I’ve seen rolled up pillows being squashed into pillow cases and apparently this is considered acceptable for use as a pillow. A lot of staff don’t want to do the personal care or other care duties but happily take the wages. Some can’t be arsed to show a little bit of care and compassion. The food they serve in hospitals is shit poor and not good for people with conditions such as heart failure and diabetes. Vulnerable people really are vulnerable when they go into hospital nowadays.

It is stupid because OP's daughter has meningitis. Do you not realise what a serious illness that is?

On a thread where a mother who is sick with worry about her daughter who is in hospital with meningitis a compassionate and kind tone would be appropriate. You post comes across as judgmental and harsh even if you perhaps didn't intend this. Lots of other posters picked up on your unkind sounding post so rather than keep defending it, acknowledge to yourself that it missed the mark.