Unwell 19 year old cat - AIBU to ask for a hand hold?

[LostCat5]

I posted about my family cat recently, when we thought he’d gone missing but we found him thankfully.

He’s quite elderly - 19 - and has had a thyroid issue for the last couple of years that we treat with medication. He’s had a reduced appetite for a couple of months, and it seems he’s now got problems with his kidney and liver, as a recent test at the vet showed reduced kidney and liver function.

He’s a really good age and he’s had a lovely life so far, but I think we imagined we would have more years with him, especially the older he got.

I think we’ll have a talk as a family about what to do now. He’s a fantastic cat who we all love so so much, and we want to make sure he is comfortable and not suffering. He’s just a gorgeous gorgeous boy and he has brought so much joy. Can I have a hand hold please?

@LostCat5 sending the biggest of hugs to you all
. I think you have to ask the question...is the cat in pain or uncomfortable?? If yes then it might be kinder to let him go. I know it's an incredibly tough choice. But I have had elderly cats, and you can tell when they have had enough x big hugs to you x

I’m sorry, @LostCat5 It’s so hard when they get older and/or unwell. They’re a member of the family after all. Have a hand hold from a fellow cat lover whose old gal has just been diagnosed with kidney problems. 🤝

I had to say goodbye to a 22 year old cat not long ago. I arranged for the vet to come to me, and all my cat knew was a last 24hours of love, attention and fuss, before she fell asleep in my arms at home.

She could have stayed longer, but it would have been for my benefit, not hers. That's what kept me strong to what was best before it became an emergency or caused her pain.

Wishing you courage and know that every pet owner shares your distress at this time.

Hi all, thanks so much for your messages, and I apologise for my late update.

I think our cat is in pain and uncomfortable, unfortunately. We got him some pain killers and antibiotics a couple of weeks ago, which he is almost finishing. Despite this, he’s still having trouble eating, even when the food is very soft or liquid. We’ve been giving him anything and everything that he’ll enjoy or be able to eat: fish flaked into tiny pieces, beef cut into tiny tiny pieces, tiny dollops of yogurt/kefir (which he used to love), egg yolk with a bit of milk etc.

He’s also sleeping a lot more and seems much more unresponsive than before, although he has his moments here and there when he perks up, which is absolutely lovely but also heart wrenching, because it’s making us question what to do and when is best to let him go.

We think tomorrow might be the day to say goodbye to him, but it’s so hard.

@LostCat5 sending the biggest of hugs to you x

So sorry @LostCat5 sending strength and warmth your way. 💔

@LostCat5 im so sorry. You sound like a wonderful cat mum. Do you feel you can trust that a moment will come in which you will know what to do?

If this is tomorrow I wish you all the strength. He will know he is loved.

Sending you a big hand-hold.

Hi all, thanks so much for your kind and thoughtful posts 💕💕 we took him to the vet today and said goodbye. The vet was so kind to our cat and said he behaved like a gentleman when he put the cannula in before he came back to give him the injection. We gave our cat lots and lots of cuddles, love and TLC yesterday and today, and most of us in the family were able to be with him at the vet when he had the injection. He is very much loved, like all of the pets on this thread ❤️❤️

So sorry @LostCat5 but you did the best thing for him. My heart goes out to you and I feel I may be in the same place soon. You’re obviously a great cat mum ❤️🐾💔

So sorry but glad you had a peaceful end and got to say goodbye.

So sorry op, sending love 💕

So sorry op, he was lucky to have a family as caring as you, you have given him the best life and made him feel so loved 💐

Sending so much sympathy and you have absolutely done the right thing. My dear cat ( 20) is fading slowly with CKD and I’m on the lookout for exactly the symptoms you described. I will be following yr path 💔💔💔
Be proud you have shown your cat such loving kindness all its life ❤️❤️❤️

I’m so sorry my little cat has just had to go on thyroid meds at 14, 19 is a good age for a cat and remember some animals don’t have people that love and care for them so he was a lucky gentleman. What colour was he if you don’t mind sharing? Mine is a little tuxedo cat. Much love on such a sad day,

My sympathy!

So glad that you had a kind and understanding vet and that family were able to be with him at the end.

You did the right thing. Sending hugs.

Big hugs Op. my 23 year old girl went to Rainbow Bridge today as well. Should have taken her sooner but couldn’t bear to. 💔☹️🌈

Sorry OP, this is so very hard on you but you did him a kindness, breaking your heart in the process.

You have my deepest sympathies - I am relatively recently bereaved myself. The grieving is a long and bumpy road, but on the plus side you don’t have to worry about your DCat any more. He is at peace and he went in the best possible conditions.

Thanks so much everyone ❤️❤️

I’m so sorry @FlibbertyGibbitt about your lovely girl, @VivaciousCurrentBun that your sweet cat has had to go on thyroid meds and @Fleetbug about your beautiful cat.

@VivaciousCurrentBun he was a gorgeous tabby boy!

I was wondering if anyone here had any thoughts on how to grieve him and remember him? I’ve asked someone to do a portrait of him and I’m writing down all my memories of him and collating all my photos and videos of him. Would be lovely to hear if anyone had any other thoughts or suggestions.

So sorry, OP - if you pop over to the Litter Tray board you will find lots of cat people who know exactly how broken your heart is. It’s such a hard, sad thing to do.

We said goodbye to our beautiful white girl just over two years ago - she was only ten but had aggressive intestinal lymphoma. I got the vet to take her paw prints and had one tattooed on my inner arm (possibly a bit extreme, I know) and we had lots of photos of her made into a nice collage, plus picked out individual pics, and had them printed/framed. She had an individual cremation and her ashes are in an urn on the hearth with one of my favourite photos of her in a frame beside it.

Also extreme, but shortly after I saw a little boy cat who had been a stray kitten and was available for adoption on the local Cats Protection website. You know how the rest of that story goes. I’m sure she sent him for me.