To find school holidays such a slog especially when the last half term at school was only 5 weeks long!?

[Elfie23]

I do tend to struggle with half terms now DD is at secondary school and doesn’t attend the kids clubs any more (I always take a few days off too). I’ve taken a couple of days off this time to try and break it up a bit. She’s 11 and not yet great at organising stuff with friends even though I’ve really encouraged and reminded her leading up to the holidays.
So I find myself with a full time job trying to also organise for her so she’s not bored out her mind or getting FOMO about what others are doing.
Urgh, does it get any easier at any point!

Why so pedantic about whether it’s called half term or not? We all know what she means.

So many snipey people! We all know that that OP is talking about the Easter holidays, no matter what she called it. And we all know that even teachers don’t have 13 weeks of holidays, and that therefore some arrangements for 11 year olds will need to be made.
It’s true that in the past things were different, including very little wfh. Also no internet, fewer mothers working full time, better public transport services so that kids could get themselves out and about. None of this helps OP. The fact that she chose to have a child doesn’t mean that she has to find every aspect of child rearing easy.
Op, some of us do recognise that the first few years of secondary school are tough, kids clubs are often not an option, you can’t arrange play dates like you did at primary school, and you are not free to provide entertainment yourself. There have been some useful suggestions re hobbies and crafts, but for some kids it is dull doing it all alone. DD will have to be more self sufficient, and might be resisting this. But it’s not too late for her to arrange to see friends even if she hasn’t organised anything so far. She might need to be pushed to do this. Maybe there is something like an intensive course she could be booked onto ( probably too late for this holiday, but worth doing in the summer, tennis or swimming or something).
The worry for me would be the temptation of mostly unsupervised ( because you are working)online activity.

Fuck me people are being nasty today!
Half term, Easter holidays, who gives a fuck which is correct, stop bring pedantic and concentrating on an irrelevant part of the post, really pointless!
And since when has someone come on here to say they are struggling with kids been hit with a barrage of people saying that you choose to have them....when has that ever been helpful to hear as a mother?? Stop being complete cockwombles!

11 is a difficult age as the clubs disappear and they’re a bit too young to be totally independent, although should be taking most of their own arrangements (I used to if we were doing childcare swaps).

i had a few of my own friends w DC so we saw them - do you have that so you can arrange yourself?

Otherwise they’d have to be bored, but I have DC close in age and they’d entertain themselves up to a point.

Is Easter Monday not a Bank holiday where you are?

It's just a tricky stage, isn't it?

I agree with PPs that if she's not self sufficient to plan her days independently yet, you still need to suggest things. Maybe you could add a library haul into the list PPs have come up with if she likes books?

Also, are you sure there are no suitable camps? Maybe we're lucky here, but there's one for senior schools that do more age appropriate activities or the local tennis club runs holiday camps. They're not all day but it's a few hours.

It's not that British don't love our kids, it's that we're in a state economically where often both parents need to work and our annual leave isn't enough!

I agree. The 'school isn't childcare' is a bit of a covid era cliche isn't it. I can just imagine how self satisfied these posters are when using it 🙄It just ignores the reality of working life.

Same. Allows you to work too.

I’m a teacher and I treasure the holidays with my two, it makes up for all the stuff I miss out on in term time.

I have to say I'm surprised that our 12yo (year 7) isn't off out with his new friends. I expected him to be doing that by now.

But there we go. I've got this week as leave, so DS and I are doing things together. At least I can swim and do the food shop without worrying about him.

Why are people banging on about it not being half term. Who gives a toss what people call it?

OP, 11 is a tricky age. Too old for child care but not quite old enough to be independent.

She might need to work? Is it really that difficult a concept to grasp?

That’s nice, lots of us would love that but don’t get the holidays off as annual leave

This. It’s the Easter holidays - not half term. I don’t understand parents saying that they find the school holidays hard work. Don’t have children then! It’s not a secret that children aren’t in school 24/7.

Might be hard work if they don't have enough for activities or rely on free school meals. Bet you have a big house, big garden, go on holidays etc? They might have children with additional needs who when they are at school or nursery it is a respite for them? The child might not like the change of routine.

It's a wonder anyone asks for advice on MN anymore. It seems to be full of arseholes who are only here to nit pick and give the OP a hard time.

Mine is 12 and it’s an in between age which makes it tricky. My husband and I have taken a week off + the long bank holiday weekend. Then DS is in clubs Tue-Fri. The holiday club options are limited at this age and bloody expensive where I am.

I left DS to sort an inset day last week and he invited a hoard of kids round. All fine for a day or two but I can’t wfh every day and feeding them all would get expensive. Basically leaving them to it ends up being chaotic / hard work for me either way. it’s the extra week that makes Easter a pain in the neck - it’s usually those that work in education that can take the full 2 weeks off.

I don't get the child free ones who come on here saying they were glad they didn't have any kids. Like, so?

They need to keep off any parenting threads. No one cares they don't have kids.

So why is having your 11 year old at home while you work a slog?

This is the absolute dream, but (certainly where I am) all other parents are regularly planning wonderful days out / constantly entertaining their children so none of my DC’s friends are doing things like this, so if I were to suggest these things they’d look at me like I was crazy.

It feels like entertaining them these days is so much harder because of the competition with screens; alphabetising books etc just doesn’t hold any allure / appeal compared to the digital world. Sad but true.

Every time someone rocks out the MN classic "school is not childcare" I like to point out that the government insisted that schools remain open for key worker children during Covid, indicating that they very much do view school as childcare.

11 is a tricky age I found in the holidays. Too old for most childcare clubs or they hate going because the clubs are full of 5 year olds.

But also, still a bit young and lacking in confidence for arranging meet ups with friends. In the end, the other Mums and I coordinated meet ups for them, whilst gently encouraging them to do the same. It worked, and now they mostly organise themselves at age 13, unless transport is required!

I do tend to struggle with half terms now DD is at secondary school

Half terms, ie, holidays.