AIBU to ask if we all have a person who we once knew, lost touch with, and wonder where they are now?

[Orangy]

15 years ago, when I first moved to the city where I live, I shared a house with four other people, all young(ish) professionals. We all got
on well, and rubbed along fine, and I’m still in touch with two of them.

One of the other housemates had an unusual job - I forget exactly what he did but he worked really intensely for 2-4 weeks at a time and we never saw him. He then used to have several weeks off and so he was always around the house.

I think he might have had a drinking problem, although he was “functioning” and it never caused any issues. I remember distinctly coming home from work one day and he was in the living room, playing a football game on his console, while drinking Baileys from a pint glass.

Anyway, after 18 months, we all went our separate ways and I never saw him again. I do often wonder where he is, what’s he doing, and whether he still drinks Baileys by the pint.

Anyone got anything similar?

Yes there are a good few people I knew at uni or worked with on the past that I would love to reconnect with. Knew them before social media or email existed so it was harder to keep in touch.

I used to have a policeman friend, we met raving in the 90s. He ended up leaving the force, as the two things clashed. Also, he was far too nice to be a copper - one of the kindest people I've ever met really.

My old housemate in the late 90s - she was completely nuts and sex mad. She had a party in the house then when it was just me and her at the end of the night she took an overdose so I had to take her to A&E to get her stomach pumped. Happened a few times. I often wonder where/how she is but she has such a common name it’s seemingly impossible to find her

There’s loads of very nice, very kind coppers.

I'd love to know what my uni boyfriend is up to.these days. We stayed in touch for a bit after we broke up but then just sort of lost touch, he was never on any social media that I could find and I just find it so weird that he was so important to me at one point and now he's just not part of my life at all. I wonder if he got married, had kids, is doing ok and is happy..??

Yes. My childhood best friend who meant everything to me..
He and his family left in the middle of the night after their was some kind of attack.
I remember just looking at the police tape and the blood up the walls near his front door the next morning
And my best friend was gone. We were 10.

I saw him VERY briefly while on a ride at a funfair about 3 or 4 years later, and he called my name but i lost sight of him and never saw him again

I dont remember his surname or there door number
Iv tried to look for news reports of the attack multiple times but i cant remember the date

@ImDoneOnceAndForAll2 Iv tried to look for news reports of the attack multiple times but i cant remember the date

Chat gpt has been really helpful to me when trying to remember a weirdly specific thing with only a few details. Sometimes it takes me a few sessions, so I have screenshotted the chat so I can do it again the next week with those details added.

I had a friend like that. She had a common name too.

A couple of housemates from the '90s.

I probably could find them if I looked hard enough - one I knew her married name.

I did find my childhood Malaysian penfriend on FB, and a friend from the '90s housewares time on LI.

And there was one housemate I'd like to know what happened to him, but absolutely not to meet again.

@ImDoneOnceAndForAll2 If you were 10, you have the year and could narrow it done to months, you know the antreet they lived on you don’t need an door number, also would your parents know the surname? I remember my childhood friends names even 30yrs later odd you don’t.

Yes, I had a penfriend when I was a teenager who lived in Sunderland - we never met (I think I had her address from a penpal column in a magazine). We used to write each other long letters on the back of photocopied collages that we made and exchanged tapes. She was really funny and sharp, we loved the same music and films, talked about everything we did and what we thought about the world. I had a shit time at school, no pals, not a very happy family and honestly sometimes I think it might have actually saved me having this friend. I think our letters tailed off around the time I went to uni and made in-person friends at last. Sadly she has an extremely common name that I can't find anything of her but I think about her often. Just random tales she mentioned about her family or things, like her dad went out drinking once with John Hurt (I forget how or why) and stuff about her youth club. I am convinced that if we somehow got back in contact, we would still have a lot in common even though I have almost totally different interests and life now.

And many many more who are the exact opposite. The culture as a whole is famously toxic.

Yer i know the rough months and year. But no idea on surname. My parents wouldnt know.... It was London and not that kind of estate really.
Iv looked multiple times over the years

Will take a look thank you. Been looking for years for him

I agree. There are plenty of aggressive ones too so you can't rely on it, but some are there to serve and protect the public.

Yes a friend I knew from a baby. His mum had him young, was a single mum which was rare in the early 70s still. She later married and my friend clearly was 'in the way' got less than his younger brothers for Christmas etc. We ended up in the same class in secondary school and stayed close. I went to sixth form, he got a job and I last saw him about the age of 18.

With the death of my parents especially my dad I found it hard to visit the village we grew up in for many years.

When his mum died when we were about 40 he was included in the death notice as how she would be missed by her husband and sons 'and X'. I came across her grave marker recently and he's not mentioned although his brothers are.

I've not seen him for 40 years now and even the village queen bee of our youth doesn't know what happened to him.

Again it's z common name.

A woman I was in a refuge with just over ten years ago. She was from a very religious family and had had a baby in secret, and was in the refuge trying to work out what to do next. She couldn't go back home with the baby. I never knew her surname so I can't look her up.

And a young girl I took back to her student halls when she was lost on Old Street, London, at 4am one night. She was drunk, her friends had her phone. That was 14 years ago nearly and I wonder what she did after uni.