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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to ask for your help - hysterectomy

9 replies

BeGoneUterus · 31/03/2026 22:06

Hi all

Have posted here for traffic as I am genuinely flummoxed and so so upset that I cannot think rationally.

Brief backstory: about 7 years I suffered a (missed by a&e)displaced ankle fracture playing a sport. By the time they realised what was going on, I needed surgery to remove bone and repair ligaments etc. At some point in the distant future I may need ankle fusion surgery as I suffer from bad arthritis in this ankle now. I am prescribed codeine, and I take these on an ad- hoc basis when needed. there are days/weeks where I don’t need them at all, and there are days where I might have 3-4 tablets a day. I only ever take one tablet at a time. This is relevant.

Today I had a full open hysterectomy with everything out including cervix and ovaries following upsetting biopsy results.

I have private medical insurance through work, so I have had this procedure done at my local private hospital in the south east. It is with my NHS Gynaecologist Consultant as she’s fabulous.

When I woke up from the procedure in recovery the pain was indescribable. I remember being given pain relief at the time. 20 mins later, pain is still very bad.

It’s at this point I over hear the following comments from the only male doctor in recovery (as an FYI, I was the only patient in recovery)

She’s maxed out. She’s not having anymore. Paracetamol and ibuprofen only until discharge now. I’m not feeding her opioid addiction-
Under no circumstances is she to have any opioids whilst here.
Look at her, she’s looks like a classic drug user (I’m slim)

So now I’m back up on the ward in my lovely private room, with the loveliest nurse and ward staff, and I’m absolutely devastated. Firstly because a male doctor I’ve never met thinks I’m addicted to drugs, and secondly because it’s been used against me in the recovery of major abdominal surgery

I was completely honest with the anaesthetic team, but its backfired. I just want to go home and curl up in my own bed. This is really not how I thought going private would be.

OP posts:
pikachu11 · 01/04/2026 02:09

That's terrible and I'd be making a complaint. If you need urgent support there should be a patient advocacy team. Did they assume this just because you are slim?

Bobbie12345678 · 01/04/2026 02:10

Are you 100% sure he was talking about you and not on the phone to the ward or something?
It sounds terrible if it was about you. I am so sorry you are having to deal with this.

Smarvellous · 01/04/2026 02:10

Really sorry this is happening to you. I would try to get the lovely nurse onside and tell her what you overheard and how upset and in pain you are Flowers

Seabreeze18 · 01/04/2026 07:14

Do u have any autism? The reason I ask is sometimes pain relief doesn’t work in the same way?
this happened to a friend and they completely dismissed her pain levels! Definitely complain!

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 01/04/2026 07:16

Has the nurse confirmed that you can’t have any other pain relief? Will you see the surgeon again? Can you ask if there’s another doctor you can see?

TreesOfGreen99 · 01/04/2026 07:20

I suggest you contact your gynae or her receptionist at 9am and ask for urgent review of your pain med.
I had a “minor” hysterectomy (internal stitches only) a couple of years ago. The pain is intense and comes on very suddenly. I was on codeine plus ibuprofen and paracetamol at full strength for over a week, before bringing down the meds gradually over the next 2 weeks.

Smarvellous · 01/04/2026 07:24

Yy, I was just coming back to thread to suggest contacting your nhs consultant and/or your gp to complain/provide evidence to the dickweed doctor? Also PALs.

JoyApple · 03/04/2026 12:41

If I were you I would pretend you didn't hear the comment and request stronger painkillers.

An open hysterectomy is extremely painful. I'm almost two weeks post surgery and still in so much pain.

FishersGate · 03/04/2026 12:46

Unprofessional but I am not surprised. I am not sure you should still be prescribed codeine 7 laters either tbh. Its a highly addictive drug

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