Are other full-time working families finding there is nothing left?

[fatface001]

Alarm went off at 5:30 this morning, then an hour stood on a packed train into London for the commute. We are a normal family: one child and two full-time jobs. I’ve always enjoyed working and have always worked hard, and I don’t mind that at all — but I do expect that full-time work should still mean there’s something left at the end of the month for a normal life.

But that really doesn’t feel like the case anymore.

There’s nothing left at the end of the month. Everything has been stripped back, all non-essentials have gone, and even basic things around the house are being put off or done ourselves because there isn’t spare money for trades. It’s just constant cutting back.

What’s hard is that we’re both working really long hours and doing everything we’re “supposed” to do, but it still feels like we’re going backwards rather than getting ahead.

When I hear talk about “those with the broadest shoulders” contributing more, I honestly don’t recognise it anymore in real life. It doesn’t feel like anyone in our position has anything left to give — it feels like the pressure is entirely on ordinary working households just to stand still.

I’m not looking for luxuries — just the sense that working still gives you a bit of breathing room. Right now it doesn’t feel like that at all.

Is anyone else feeling the same?

It's a worldwide thing. The billionaires are hoovering up all the money.

We don't currently live there, but partner was in the UK (London and Kent) last month for the first time in 6 years seeing family. He was shocked at the costs of eating out and train travel in particular. All his family are struggling and they have decent jobs - teachers, physiotherapist, etc. He said it was very depressing to see and night and day compared to pre covid. He actually came home quite despondent about it all.

Same .
And I wasent winning when I was in full time employment either.

I’m pretty worried about the upcoming benefits reforms. I have a lot of stress just being chronically ill, without having to
worry about the rug being pulled from under my feet too. I have no other options. At least if you are working, you have the possibility of looking for a new job or a promotion.

I have always looked after my health. I
didn’t expect to be like this.

I am in full agreement with the OP, but relying on benefits is actually pretty stressful. The DWP treats benefits claimants with utter contempt. They don’t follow their own customer charter either eg they asked me to supply 4 months of bank statements plus a load of other documents (I don’t mind doing this). They did not give me enough capacity in their upload links to allow me
to give them all the files they wanted. I asked them multiple times for more upload links. They ignored me for over a month and then wrote to me complaining that I hadn’t done what they asked and gave me practically no time to supply the rest of the documents….. and just to add salt to the wound, they told
me they had (oh so generously) extended my deadline but would fine me if I didn’t supply everything in time. I did everything humanly possible when they first asked for the documents, so I did not appreciate the threats nor feel that they had any justification to threaten me. This is just one of many examples.

We’re now benefit people due to redundancy and I can assure you we are definitely not winning.
There are no jobs there in DH’s field and after almost 12 months of looking he’s now in a minimum wage job.
As we have a mortgage, there’s no rent assistance element for us. I work as a TA in a school (so crap wage) and because i work we get no council tax support, FS meals, dental etc
UC before the minimum wage job didn’t cover all bills so now our minimal amount of savings are totally gone.
Our only saving grace was that we locked in to a 5 year mortgage at a very low rate, this will come to an end in Jan next year and I have absolutely no idea how we’re going to pay the increase.
Winning is not a word I would use to describe us.

I agree. We never eat out. We didn’t have a holiday last year - we just didn’t have the funds. I am so careful in the supermarket and everything is home cooked yet I still feel like an unnecessarily large chunk of my salary goes on food. We have a very old Toyota (by choice - cars don’t interest me) and try to walk where possible.
it seems people with passive incomes (normally from renting out multiple proponerles with no mortgage) are the ones who have the funds for a “normal” life. Or those who work in sales and get MASSIVE commissions or bonuses.

i really wanted to see an act at the O2 next month. Tickets are £150. It’s just not within our means to go.

I made the choice to have three children when the financial landscape was a lot better, assumed we'd be better off 10 years later, not worse.

If I got back at 5 30 I wouldn't be as knackered. But I get back after 7pm 3 nights a week.

So you sit down at 8pm,which is the equivalent of 9.30 for me, by which time I might as well go to bed.

For the record I only get a takeaway a couple of times a month but don't feel it should be unaffordable for a family like mine.

I am training at the moment so I will continue to work but once I am qualified we will have to assess whether it's better off for me to not work and claim UC, and not have all the additional childcare costs associated with working.

I think the NHS and other institutions could be on the brink of collapse as I think many on lower band salaries will decide working is not worth the hassle and stress any more.

@CostOfLoving this follows on from my post below - my old friends living in cheap areas moaning about costs but in their cases having little to moan about -multiple holidays a year to the sun, a decent house , ok jobs within 3 miles of home and yet going on about we ‘need ‘ Farage to make ‘their’ lives better - in what way I have no idea- !!! their lives on paper seem pretty ok from where I’m sitting for very average earners - they seem to want some kind of utopia of flash houses, new cars every few years but low costs, low tax and yet good services. For anyone paying out for nurseries etc I’m with you on that , those years are tough -although in all fairness it was the same back in the 80s - I effectively worked next to full time to bring home pocket money change for a faire few years.

You are better off working than giving it up and going on UC.

😂 not sure if you've noticed but COL has changed dramatically since autumn 2022, when my first child was born - more than realistically could have been planned for. I am getting on with it. Thanks for the words of encouragement. I was just commenting on a thread about my own experience.

Of course they can save, but they shouldn't be claiming benefits until they really need to, being allowed up to £16K in savings means you are not poor. You do not need the tax payer to top up your money. This is my point, it's a crazy amount of money that some people would only dream of having.

If something they own or chose to have then breaks, they can use their benefits or wage to pay for it or they have to do what other people have to do and get credit to pay for it until they have the money to pay for it. It's not rocket science.

Of course there is not enough money for the average worker to live off-the gov't has increased the benefits payouts exponentially. We are paying to house migrants in hotels for eternity as there aren't any houses for them! The situation will just get worse unless we deport people who arrive and immediately claim benefits, whilst not having contributed anything. The gov't can only take money from people who have money...it will get a lot worse

Yep! Some people do! Some people have problems with fertility and follow advice and end up in different situations. Everyone is different 🤷 and family 'planning' doesn't always work.

I agree with you.

It’s difficult to come off benefits because in many circumstances people are on them because of income / children / disability / a combination.

Someone working full time without disabilities / children will find it easier to increase their income if they are struggling.

Last year I had my UC review and had to explain / justify what a £6.71 incoming transaction from Vinted was. I was asked if I make money from Vinted. It was a refund from an item that never arrived.

And I also have the “stress” of leaving the house early to take my kids to childcare / school / go to work / rush back to collect them because I’m a single parent and no one else will.

With two IVF kids I am aware of that. We have a four and half year gap.

Yes but if you have savings, you have money, you aren't poor. Benefits should only be claimed if they're really needed. They allow people to have up to £16k in savings, those people are not poor, they don't need money from the tax payer if they have that much money in the bank. If you have a mortgage, you can clearly get credit to pay for your ceiling coming down, then you pay for it over time when you can. Why is it the tax payers job to pay for it?

Anyway why are we talking benefits because OP is struggling to budget? It isn't the fault of UC claimants.

Why should we go in debt rather than use savings?

Great 👍 happy for you that your planning worked out

Our high earnings go on:

Mortgage
School fees for ND child
University support for other 2 children (we earn well, we don’t want our children to have to get loans when we had free uni, and if they got jobs their study would suffer)
Utilities
Food
Insurance etc

We never eat out or go on days out. Holidays are UK camping usually.

We cannot cut private school as the state option is far too violent and raucous for my anxious child to attend and they would immediately refuse and one of us would have to stop working.

I don’t want to make my children pay for uni when my education was free. I’m lucky in that I have the option to tell them to get a loan, but for now we’ll go on spending very little indeed on ourselves (haven’t had a haircut for 1.5 years!). Only 1.5 years of uni left for the oldest! If only state schools had a modicum of discipline and order we’d be able to use it but our local one is appalling and is the best in the area apparently.

It's not short sighted at all. If you have up to £16k in the bank, you are not poor. You should not be claiming any money from the tax payer. The policy is wrong. I have no issues whatsoever with people in need being helped and contributing to benefits, I hate to see people homeless on the streets and always try to find a few quid to help those more in need. But anyone with savings does not need propped up by the tax payer, if they have savings in the bank, they are not poor and in need.

I don't despise anyone.

If you have up to £16k in the bank, you aren't poor. It's not rocket science. The policy is wrong.

How on earth are the people who don't work winning?
12 years ago, I was a single mother with 1 child on benefits.
I got my rent paid and my council tax paid (about £800 altogether, council flat) and received, about £600 a month in benefits directly.
I had to put that in 3 parts,
£200 for bills, £200 for food and £200 for everything else, I.e transport, clothes, toiletries etc.
If anything broke, I couldn't replace it. I was so poor.
That hardship made me apply for university and eventually got a good job a better house.
I find it so bizaare that people think people that don't work are winning.
Benefits have barely increased since then, and I have no idea how people that don't work are coping.
My asda shop 4 years ago used to cost £60 a week, exact same shop today costs me nearly a £100.

That's my point, you should use savings before taking any money from the tax payer.

Well to be frankly honest I would have thought having two kids and nursery would mean it wouldn't come as a shock that you are struggling?

Your own experience is that you feel entitled to have holidays while also paying for nursery. If you had your child in 2022 then they will be starting Reception soon so you have not much time left paying for nursery. You mention that costs have risen since 2022 so if you have subsequently chosen to have more children since then then you knew exactly what you were getting into so have clearly made your choices. You’re not entitled to a holiday just because you work and would like one.