AIBU to report parents treating child badly at softplay?

[Sunshine231]

AIBU to report a child being mistreated by their parents in public? For context I was in softplay with my kids today and saw a dad hitting his son after the child accidentally spilled a drink. The mother then dragged him out into the corridor and I went out after them and she was calling him all sorts of awful names, I told her it’s not acceptable to hit a child or treat him that way and she should be disgusted with herself. She looked pretty unbothered and the dad came out and took the child away while the mum just went back into softplay with their other kid and carried on like nothing had happened. I was quite shaken up and left soon after so I didn’t think to report it to the staff but in hindsight I’m wondering if I should have? We had to sign in on an iPad so I’m sure they’d have their contact details and it would all be on cctv anyway. My partner says it’s not our business and I should leave it but I have a really uneasy feeling and can’t stop thinking about the poor child 😞 unsure if I should now contact the softplay or just leave it?

Safeguarding is everyone's responsibility. You see it, you say it. Sometimes it just adds a little something to the overall picture.

Yes report it somewhere, worse will happen at home

I absolutely would have. To be so unbothered to physically lay hands on their child(physical abuse) call them names (emotional abuse) THEN be unbothered savour being judged for poor parenting. What good mother isn’t phased when someone judges her parenting?

This.

I wouldn't think the venue would be the correct place to report. Report it to ss and they can follow up with the venue to get the details of the family.

I would, because I live in Wales and it's illegal to hit anyone - children included - here. Safeguarding is everybody's business and a child that young really cannot advocate for themselves.

Yes, it sounds horrendous.

I would absolutely report this.

I would call the soft play tomorrow and let them know. That way they can hopefully check the CCTV before it gets recorded over.

Yes I would report this. If they treat the child like this in front of strangers then heaven knows what goes on behind closed doors.

Absolutely report this, to the soft play centre and to police. I’d imagine they have cctv in that corridor. Poor kid.

It’s illegal in Wales so I would report to 101, not sure where you are?

I’m in England though and I don’t think it’s illegal here unless it leaves a mark. I didn’t see any marks on the child. He looked awfully scared though 😩

Totally agree, I bet it’s a lot worst at home.

Yes , report to everyone and include the soft play centre too.

Yes as others have said please report it.
When you do, try to keep it as factual and emotionless as possible. You can say in your opinion but this could one day potentially be used in court and you don’t want some defence barrister ripping your ‘biased’ testimony to shreds. So you can say ‘the boy looked scared’ but don’t say ‘I think they’re shit parents’.

Please report it, as far fetched as it sounds you could save a child’s life.

Please report it.

My partner says it’s not our business and I should leave it

Attitudes like this allow child abuse to thrive. Definitely report.

Call 101 and report it now. The quicker you do it, the more hits you will save that child from.

I really think England needs to get on board with Wales and Scotland here. It’s disgraceful that we haven’t.

I cannot for the life of me see how it’s OK for there to be an exception to the law against assaulting others just for the smallest and more vulnerable people. I simply cannot fathom it.

@Sunshine231 you did absolutely the right thing. If nothing else the child got to hear that what he’s parents do isn’t ok.

I've never understood it either - it's weirdly one of those areas where Wales is allowed to make its own rules, but our largest neighbour hasn't seen fit to follow suit. I can't fathom it either, I totally agree with you.

As I said, awful that it’s legal in England.

It’s not exactly “mark or no mark” - it has to be “reasonable chastisement” (awful term but that’s the wording). If there’s a mark it’ll never be reasonable, but the fact there isn’t doesn’t necessarily make it ok.

Happy for Welsh children that Wales could make this law but it’s crappy that England hasn’t followed!

If you live somewhere where smacking a child is illegal then you can report it to the Police on the non-emergency number. If you're in England then unfortunately no crime has taken place. As ridiculous as it is that children in England do not receive the same protection from assault as adults, that's the reality. The Police will say it's not something they can investigate unless the child sustained a visible injury, was hit in the head/face with a closed fist, or was hit using an implement. They will tell you that if you're concerned you should contact Children's Services instead.

You should be able to find the number for your local Children's Services Multi-Agency Safeguarding Hub (MASH) online. Anyone can call them if they have a safeguarding concern about a child. But realistically they will be unable to open a referral for the child, or even log the information on their system, without the child's name and date of birth or address.

Uncomfortable as it may be, this is a police matter op. Call 101. You’ve seen a child be physically and verbally assaulted, it’s for them to determine any criminality and to refer to sw.