Aibu to consider not sending into nursery???

[WhyMee5688]

Would it be unreasonable to keep lo home off nursery next week??

Due to fly on holiday abroad at Easter for a big family holiday it’s halfway accoss the world too!
and dds nursery has said hf&m is going around on an email this week (she missed this week due to illness too)
but do I send her next week mon-weds it’s nearly 25 hours or should I not send her and wfh and flexible , and not much to do this week anyway
so technically could have her home! What do you think?? 🤔 don’t risk it /or send anyway?? she’s age three , and would miss a month in total with illness and holidays included if we don’t send her.

Why is it an issue? She's not going to miss anything by staying at home.

If she was already off last week and has avoided hfm this time I wouldn't hesitate in keeping her off to be able to enjoy your week away!

If you can manage it then definitely keep her home.

It's fine. Nursery is optional.

I feel bad not sending her but would feel bad if I did
I don’t know really I always feel guilty when she misses a day like

It’s nursery, it’s not compulsory and you’re completely within your right to take her out whenever you see fit Have a great holiday.

I guess the issue is that you are supposed to be working (wfh) and how will you do that with a three year old to care for? I agree keeping her home is sensible but I wouldn’t be impressed as your employer

If you have funded hours, you really are meant to use them and get arsey letters sometimes if you don't. You might need to call her in sick.

Thanks I just feel guilty about not sending unless genuinely poorly
( I’d never send an ill child )

but otherwise I feel bad if I kept her off for any other reason
I don’t know why really it’s strange and wondered if I was being too precious for worrying about hf&m

I don’t think missing a month of nursery will make a scrap of difference to your three year old’s development, learning or well being - I don’t think there is a reasonable or unreasonable answer here. I think you just have to decide what you want to do.

Feel bad about what though?

It's not going to affect her career oath or even her GCSE's. Just keep her home!

enjoy your holiday!!

No it's miserable when they get it & flying ling haul with a well 3 yo if hard enough, if you can do things to reduce the chance of travelling with a sick one (let alone the risk of passing it on to others) then I think it's sensible!

It's nursery. It's not compulsory. If you are worried keep her off

Children with HF&M can still attend nursery. They only need to stay home if poorly (obviously).

When my DC it they were not unwell at all but I guess you won't know how she will be.

It's not school. I don't understand the guilt! Why?

(I don't mean reply again saying "I just feel guilty", I mean really ask yourself why and look at it objectively).

Nursery isn't compulsory so you can do what you like.

I would question how your manager would feel about you wfh whilst looking after a child though. It generally not encouraged ime.

Hmm so if I think it’s because she’s never really settled and every holiday (Xmas etc) she is 100x worse going and I feel like they judge about that
also I have older teens and even missing a day they are straight onto you are really strict so makes me nervous
that’s why I guess

The only issue I can see is from your line manager’s pov! Will they be ok with you having a pre schooler hanging about the house? Can you get some more time off work yourself to cover it or tag team with a partner?

If you could tag team in some way (so both do of of your working day during the day and part after dd is in bed) that sounds better as you could each take dd out somewhere less germy like the park.

Always does seem a bit sad when kids are stuck in all day. They don’t need to be in nursery all the time at that age other than for childcare, but they do need to get out fo the house and/ or be looked after.

Well don’t let her miss school once she gets there unless she’s ill. And if she (or any other child of the family) is ill, you tell the school first thing in the morning before they have a chance to “get on to you”.

Do what’s best for you and your child, if you can look after her at home then why not. But HFM is a rather mild disease for most children and, as others said, doesn’t require staying at home if they’re feeling ok. Childhood illnesses are unfortunately unavoidable and being too anxious about them catching anything will do them no good if it means keeping them at home all the time.

We're flying to Florida next week and it hadn't occurred to me to be worried about 3yo dd picking up illnesses at nursery tbh, she has attended until the end of term on Friday and is doing holiday camps until the day before we fly! But we've been lucky as none of my dcs are particularly susceptible and I don't find flights and holidays stressful. If it puts your mind at rest that's the main thing.