To go on holiday with my partner and not take my children?

[youregorgos]

I have my children Monday to Friday, ex has them Saturday and Sunday (Friday 7pm to Monday 7am). Children are 5&3.

I’m taking my children on a big 10 night holiday in May. I’d like to book a break with my partner in September (Monday to Sunday) but I’m feeling incredibly guilty. The break is a fairly cheap all inclusive.

My parents will have my children Monday to Friday while I’m away and they love their nan and grandad. Ex will have them Saturday and Sunday, then I’d pick them up on the Monday as usual.

Has anyone done this? Am I just being incredibly selfish?

No, you didn't, but it is true that OTHER POSTERS (sorry if that comes across as shouting but I want to be clear) have guilt-tripped the OP.

EDITED typo

Please, read what I said again. I am patently not accusing that poster of trying to make the OP feel bad.

You said people should lay off the OP and by quoting that poster it reads like your implying she should also lay off OP

OK, one last time, here's what I said to GertrudePerkins:
(my bold) 'I know you didn't say or suggest that, but someone says, 'At the weekend I WANT to be with my dc, not elsewhere.' and someone else says, 'DH and I have been on holiday without the kids several times, but we’re with them most of the time'

I don't know what else to say or how much clearer I can make it.

In this case I absolutely wouldn’t do it. As I say I’ve holidayed many times with DH without kids, but we’re with them every weekend. Just do a 5 day break with your partner, but I’m sure if this was genuine you’d have thought of that.

I understand what you said, I read it but I’m saying it did come across like you were including the poster in the group that need to lay off OP, I can see now because you’ve explained that’s not what you meant but that was how it looked

Do those people then go away with their boyfriends missing key time with their kids? I wonder if this is a reverse to shine a light on how MN views mums and dads, as a dad choosing his gf over their kids would get slated. The arrangement sucks if you want to really see your children grow up, if it’s literally the only thing that works for them you don’t go away with your boyfriend, if you do, you go away on the 5 days you’re not with the kids. That’s plenty of time for a break.

This really isn't real life. When you have children that young it shouldn't be an option, if it is you need to ask yourself where your priorities are and how to be less selfish? Putting a relationship before your children is plain wrong, don't care what other people's opinions are but it is just fact!

I go away with my partner and not my children once a year and we have a family holiday once a year, so I am not against travelling without kids, 5 and 3 seems very little to me though.

I think secondary school age is more appropriate.

Thats just my opinion though.

I took my son away on holiday to Spain when he was 3.

It was just me and him. One of the best holidays I've ever had. Loved it. We ate out together every night (he has always loved foods and been quite adventurous).

Would you have said that my ex husband didn't have priorities in the right place because he was apart from his son for that week?

The kids will have a great time with the grandparents. Seriously.

I don’t fully know what those people do but who are any of us to judge what another parent decides to do?
OP isn’t away from her kids for 5 nights. They go Friday evening they’re away 2 full days and back early Monday morning. OP won’t miss her children growing up by taking a week away from them

OP has asked about the situation, we are literally being asked to judge it. She spends a huge proportion of her time away from them already, in my view, I too would feel guilty. She’s feeling guilty for a reason. If this is genuine.

Me and my husband enjoy a break away but I’ll be honest and say I do feel very guilty even tho we take them 1/2 a year. We normally do 4 nights max, I could not do a week. My children are happy at GPs but say they miss me.

Hand on my heart I would definitely encourage a break away. It does you the world of good as a couple and really resets you. But I’d genuinely be wary of how long you book.

Do it. Your children will be fine.

Our family is not broken, but my husband and I have always had a weekend or 3 away, just us two, every year. As long as the kids are happy and excited to go to grandparents, I think it’s really important.

OP has asked about the situation in regards to whether anyone has done this and presumably for other people’s experience if they have done this. She’s not asking people to judge if they think she’s sees her kids enough in a week

I've never gone on a holiday without my kids who are now 12 and 16 but I suppose it's different when you are divorced with a new partner who might not like to go with your dc? Personally I don't want to go away without them- time flies by and soon they will decline to go on holiday with their parents so I want to make the most of it.

But if you are fine with it and you know that your children are in good hands and happy then go for it! No need to feel guilty if your children are loved and happy to be at their gp.

Will your 3 year old genuinely be fine without you for a week? I had to visit a dying relative when one was 3 and an ill relative when the other was about 4. First I left with their dad, the second I left with a much loved aunt. Both missed me so badly. They survived but 3 is so little . Obviousjy fine if you know they’ll be ok! Only you can tell really

She also asked “am I being incredibly selfish?”.