AIBU that reducing under 5s screen time is way more complicated than just issuing guidelines?

[Lovelygreenpen]

This guidance is welcome. We need to know facts and risks to make informed choices. But choices often aren’t made entirely freely. Think about healthy eating and exercise guidance and how complicated these can be to follow due to costs and time.

How would following this under 1 hour rule change your daily routine?
Most parents need to work all the hours with COLC and decades of rising housing costs. working life also often expands to expect parents to be in contact from home outside of paid work hours.
How are busy parents supposed to manage? How are solo working parents specifically supposed to manage? Any family with more than one child?
And what about the screens used in childcare settings?
What are the responsibilities of the makers of the crazy overstimulating content for babies and kids?

We know women often have to do more domestic labour than men, even where they live with a male partner. Also, that the makers of the content aimed at kids specifically employ addictive techniques.

So how is this pressured wider environment going to change to make this recommendation more realistic?
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c1d936n7445o

Again, not an opinion, a statement. I’m happy to have an intelligent conversation with anyone about any subject and respect other people’s perspectives. But what I do not respect are people who make statements in an attempt to feel superior and to try and shame other mums. It’s unhelpful and as I’ve already said, adds nothing to the conversation.

You took what I wrote totally wrong.

We actually want to be with our kids at the weekend (walking, days out, cinema, meals out, enjoying being with them). They have plenty of time to be bored aswell including tv and gaming (shock horror!). I completely agree kids need plenty of time at home to do whatever they want aswell.

The point I was making was lots of posts making out previous generations of kids never watched tv. We did lots of tv watching in the 80’s/90’s/00’s mainly because our parents had to do things like the big shop at the weekend and that was the norm. We do fun things at the weekend and value that time so much. I live for the weekends/holidays with our children and that’s why you have kids in the first place.

My point was we engage better with kids and than ever before in every aspect of life. Looking back on previous generations through rose tinted glasses is ridiculous.

Im so glad i’m raising my kids now for so many reasons and teaching them how to use technology responsibly (and balanced with all the other things to do in life).

None of my children have ever had a phone or ipad under 5.
TV is completely different as it's a difference distance away.

No I’m a young gen X who as I’ve already said, was a teen in the 90s and had my babies in the late 00s.
You’ve said you were a child during this period so just because you were around doesn’t mean you know what life was like for adults.

You’re talking about the 00s like it was a completely different time (it really wasn’t that different to today) so I’ll repeat which of your claims (all) have already been refuted as you don’t seem to be paying attention.

In the 00s children DID go to nursery before age 2.
In the 00s many families DID have two working parents (not just mum working pt as a childminder).
In the 00s most people did NOT have grandparents who’d retired at 60 around to assist.

Hth.

You seem to miss the point that plonking a young child in front of a screen is a choice and parents need to take responsibility for the choices they make and the consequences these will have on the child’s development. I see parents staring at their phones while pushing a child in a buggy who also has a screen, families out for meals where each person is staring at a screen - these are ideal opportunities to interact with your child.

I think it's a bit like the no alcohol for pregnant women thing: you can't say 'some' because people bend it.

I grew up in 80s and 90s. Lots of telly. I was an avid reader and became an English teacher. I went ourside only if i absolutely had to. Many of my generation watched a lot of telly, but still had decent concentration spans.

My own kids had telly from 6am, because we had to get ready for work. Late 00s babies.

They didn't have access to tablets.

When I pushed the pram, I talked to them.
Whenever we went anywhere, I took books, crayons and paper.
We had music on, rather than TV.
Bedtime stories every night.

I've been teaching since 2000. I would say it's the tablet/ phone screen that's causing more issues than telly. We got used to making lessons engaging and chunked etc, but I'm hard pressed to help a child progress if they want new and novel every 30 seconds.

You seem to think nothing else will occupy a child other than a screen!

One of mine had regular hospital appointments as a young child (from before the age of 2) at an outpatient clinic. We were always there a good couple of hours and had quite of bit of time waiting around so always took a bag with some story books, some colouring in and crayons, and some sticker books or playing cards.

Never once did we need to resort to sitting looking at a screen?!

Its laziness. People either don't want to have to spend time getting their child set up with something to do, or don't want to have to deal with A tantrum over wanting a screen.

The government is issuing guidelines, not laws. If someone wants their child to spend 6 hours a day on a screen, they can still do that in their own home.

What would be nice though is if it was a bit less socially acceptable for babies and toddlers to be on screens out and about.

How did you keep your autistic child entertained out of curiosity? (x2 autism mum here) - were they verbal at the time and showing understanding/ able to participate in activities with minimal supervision (asking to understand btw)

Loving all the boomer comments on here haha.
I was born in 1996 and looking back I had way more TV time than my daughter does. I had a tv in my own room before starting primary school and watched all the Disney videos on it, and later on even had sky tv on it. I remember playing GTA on the PS2 at primary school age and I remember a summer holiday devoted to playing the Sims 2. That being said there was plenty of outdoor play, toys and extra curricular stuff as well as family days out. The biggest difference is no screens when out and about, although I remember as time went on there was a portable DVD player for the car and my younger siblings had Nintendo DSs. That being said my mum would have never brought out the DVD player in a restaurant or waiting room.

The funny thing is as I mentioned in an earlier comment, I am mindful of screen time. But it’s the grandparents who rush to stick it on to keep my daughter happy rather than just sorting out whatever she actually wants (and especially don’t care what overstimulating shows / crappy YouTube brain rot they put on). Even my own grandma who raised her own children in the 60s/70s will put stuff on for her.

So so many! Accessible safe outdoor play spaces, better public transport, affordable childcare and wrap around care, affordable housing, less poverty generally so such a large proportion of parents don't exist under intolerable levels of stress, a functioning NHS so that parents with chronic conditions can access care, way way more support for parents of children with SEND from early years on, public being more accepting that children out and about do move and make noise so parents don't feel societal pressure to use an iPad to keep them quiet....those are some obvious ideas but there's literally hundreds.

A child can be occupied by more than a screen.

Incorrect. HoL are fighting for it to be part of the CWS Bill and have voted for it a second time. Not to mention the other parental authority & responsibilities that are being handed over to the government in that bill. It is an extremely large bill that has not been scrutinised nearly enough with the government trying to rush it through.

Thing is, I live in an affluent hippiesh area. We have two massive parks with playgrounds and more ducks than you can shake one of the many sticks at. All my friends have kids in nursery 3 days pw, lots of affordable childcare around, and we still have money to go to the bougie organic wine bar of a weekend. There are no traffic zones with kids playing out, and we have some of the best bus services in Europe plus trains. Very very VERY child.friendly place.

But my friends still use copious screen time and I'm seen as the uber strict one (usually either 0 or 1h unless ill). One friend brings her toddler into bed at 5.30 and falls asleep again whilst the kid watched cbeebies.

I don't think young kids should have much time near screens at all, but I agree re quality of programming. Stuff like Cocomelon is a perfect example of content designed to be overstimulating and addictive :

https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2024/06/17/cocomelon-children-television-youtube-netflix

Do screens help regulation? I thought it was often the opposite.

They actually do yes. They can also contribute to dysregulation. Both these things can apply even to the same child.

Incidentally, my mother used to show me old cartoons mainly when I was young: Top Cat, which I loved, or old shows like the Wombles. I think I'll do the same when I have children : older TV shows often had more muted colours etc which I think is healthier for young kids

Op, gently, many of us brought up our dc before mobile smartphones, we coped including managing them in spaces where they can’t run around, think waiting rooms, aeroplanes, restaurants, buses - we used books, colouring , puzzles and we talked quietly to the dc, they were if anything better behaved than dc today. My dc were allowed tv, eg Sesame Street and Zaboonafoo were favourites, but an hour max a day, in line with guidelines then.

Why? Are the children unable to have fun without screens? Surely not?

“tvs were babysitters before phones”

Big difference is that you didn’t take your tv everywhere with you so children had to learn how to be bored or had to be occupied with something far less zombie-fying and addictive.

I thought the same when I saw that headline! My husband and I also argue about who uses their phone the most! We can’t watch anything without one of us picking our phone up. Least I’m not alone as this thread proves

This resonates with me so much! I used to be quite a focussed person but those days are gone. Quite scary really

Frankly, I find it sad that our two glorious parks (one of which has this brilliant urban communal garden with a mud kitchen) are almost entirely empty Oct-April, and even after only on sunny days. I'm there rain or shine togged up, and I think my son single-handedly saved the plant nursery there by popping in for a new plant each week.

But in spite of loads of kids in the area, it's almost deserted if it's so much as a bit cloudy. We had lovely snow (crisp, thin enough to walk easily but enough to sledge). Still hardly anyone out.

I think playing outdoors has really helped my son learn to do his own thing indoors too - you have to imagine everything outdoors/experiment with stuff. Helps him when he comes inside (as well as being worn out and ready to chill).

How are parents going to tear themselves away from their phones to keep their children occupied without involving screen time?