Is it weird to say you are taking your spouse out to dinner?

[FeelinLost]

Weird one but my male friend said the other day that he is taking his wife out for dinner. I know households can be different but when you're a shared household, joint bank account etc, are you really taking the other one out? Or are you taking them out because you have booked it/organised it rather than paying?

Am I being unreasonable to ask if its weird he said he is taking his wife out? 😂

My DH is taking me out for dinner tomorrow night for my birthday. He’s booked it, he’s paying for it, he’s driving. So yeah he’s taking me out. I have no idea where we are going.

Depends on how the finances work, we pay into the joint account monthly then leftover money is ours to spend so we do take each other out

We have a shared account for bills, holidays, household expenses etc, and if we decide to randomly go out for dinner, we'll pay from that.

If I'm taking DP out for his birthday or vice versa, we'll pay from our personal accounts.

But it's also just a turn of phrase that might not mean anything and is not worth thinking twice about.

We don't pool all of our money.
Sometimes (very occasionally!) we "go out for dinner"
Sometimes I "take DH out" as in I plan, book and pay from my own money
Sometimes he takes me out, same parameters

YABU.

My DP of 24 years takes me out for dinner occasionally. Books the table at a restaurant, wears smart clothes, does the driving and pays for it with his fun money. I love it.

YABU. We have been married over 20 years. We have a joint account but also our own accounts. Mostly we'd just 'go out to dinner' but if it were one of our birthdays or something, we might take each other out for dinner.

That is probably what is bothering you about it.

Couples must have some spending money of their own to treat each other now and again to a meal. If not every birthday present, Xmas present random bunch of flowers is a joint expense. You pay half for your own gifts.

Yep we often say this
me -‘are you taking me out to dinner?’
we share all of our finances.

Dh and I have some joint accounts for a few things and we each have our own accounts where we transfer money every month for our own discretionary money.
When we go out for dinner Dh always pays! Unless it’s his birthday (and even then the bugger always tries to pay). I like him ‘taking me out for dinner’. I do sometimes treat him to a lunch out, I’m not a total monster 😂

This!
I sometimes take DH out, he sometimes takes me. Although I rarely say it like that, I'd tell people that we're going out to dinner at X restaurant, I probably wouldn't mention which one of us is paying.

Hard agree.

We do have separate "personal spends" accounts too, but even if the meal is paid for from the joint account, whoever has bothered to do the organising is definitely considered to be taking the other out in our house.

Yes, to this, and neither do we have shared accounts.

Hard agree!

This has prompted me to message DP and ask him if he wants to take me for dinner on Saturday night (from our joint account)

I assume he means he is paying out of his own savings/income rather than joint funds. My husband takes me out for lunch or dinner sometimes.

I tend to think this means he has booked it and booked a babysitter.

I’ve been married for 29 years and have never shared a bank account with DH. We take each other out! We do share a mortgage account though.

It's nice to make an occasion of it. I took my OH to dinner when I got a surprise tax rebate for example. Spread the joy.

That would be the language in our house. Sort of depends who suggested and arranged it. Has nothing to do with who's paying for it.