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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to want advice about dealing with entitled school mum?

68 replies

CatPineappleTennis · 25/03/2026 18:58

There’s an infuriating school mum at my DD’s school.
She drives through the village to the school every morning above the speed limit. Lots of kids around and pedestrians and pushchairs etc.
She often parks on a grass verge with a No Parking sign. Her child passenger gets out onto flowerbeds.
One time she parked half on the pavement and opened her car door onto a passing school dad and his daughter. He told her she’d done it and she just said “no I haven’t”.
The school have put out repeated reminders not to park on the school’s neighbours verges and she still does it.
She complained her son didn’t get a big enough part in the nativity in Reception.
Her DS does seem to do disproportionately well out of school play parts and church readings and competitions. I suspect the school is trying to appease her.
She went into the school crying dramatically saying another boy was bullying her son. My DD is in both their class and told me it’s her son who’s nasty to others. Another couple of school mums told me that was their experience too.
She accosted the other boy’s mum in the playground telling her to “sort it out”. Very confrontational.
She complains on the group chat that there aren’t enough facilities at the school (play equipment for example) or school the events put on aren’t well organised. She complained about the food at the school disco.
I saw her park in the parent and child space at the supermarket when she was alone.
She comes across as rich and entitled, if anyone says anything to her she just denies any wrongdoing and has a go at them. Her husband enables her, at one school event he went up to the headteacher and was clearly expressing his displeasure about something, kept on at the poor head for about fifteen minutes. No one else could speak to the head as he monopolised their time.
Due to kids ages I have this family in my life for years to come.
Does every school have one?
I have her name and number and address and car registration if you’ve got any suggestions for teaching her a lesson!

OP posts:
RudolphTheReindeer · 25/03/2026 20:52

I'd suggest she joins the PTA and if she's too busy they'd love cash donations, then let the air out her tyres 😂

BoredZelda · 25/03/2026 20:59

What is she actually doing to you? Other than some nebulous “oh it affects the community” trope? How is any of this affecting you directly?

CatPineappleTennis · 25/03/2026 21:02

Someone did ask her to join the PTA! She said she’s too busy.

OP posts:
Vallmo47 · 25/03/2026 21:04

While I agree this person sounds annoying, I also feel like you’re too invested in what she does. The comment about seeing her park up at a mother and baby space for example, unless you needed that space for that exact same moment I would simply roll my eyes and move on with my day.
I agree people like that are frustrating though, it’s just … I genuinely think that if you stop watching what she’s doing you will likely feel happier in yourself also. Don’t give her what she craves the most - attention.

RosesAndHellebores · 25/03/2026 21:14

Might the school have info that you don't.
We had one like it. Absolute pain on the arse and very needy. The child was nice.

Turned out she was bipolar. A very decent and loyal dh had stuck by her.

Nod, smile, occasionally have the child for tea if yours likes them. Swerve calls, invitations and favours, because you have an obligation.

May be far more to ot than you know.

LlynTegid · 25/03/2026 21:19

If the car engine is left running and the car is unattended, all you need to do is enter the vehicle and switch it off.

The lack of road safety is fact not opinion.

HappyMummaOfOne · 25/03/2026 22:14

Snap a picture of her car and pop it in the class WhatsApp saying “Not sure if anyone knows who this inconsiderate driver is but they often drive too fast near the school and leave their car running at drop off. If they could drive and park a bit more considerately it would be really appreciated.” Then if they respond just pretend you didn’t realise it was them “oh gosh Karen I hadn’t realised it was you. Well now you have been named and shamed do you think you could stop leaving your car running 🙃 Thanks hun xx”

JohnofWessex · 25/03/2026 22:24

There was an issue with misuse of disabled parking bays in my town a few years ago.

Police handed out acceptable behaviour contracts so things like parking on verges can have interesting consequences

Whoops75 · 25/03/2026 22:39

She is one end of ‘those people’ Spectrum and you are the other! (Insert eye roll)

DPotter · 25/03/2026 22:41

Her husband enables her, at one school event he went up to the headteacher and was clearly expressing his displeasure about something, kept on at the poor head for about fifteen minutes. No one else could speak to the head as he monopolised their time

I get this sometimes at Craft fairs and we have a code. You give the be-rater / entitled a few minutes and then you interrupt firmly, do not defer just, barge right in, until right at the very end when you have effectively taken over the conversation. It feels rude, it is rude but the entitled are being rude and your head needs saving.

As to the compliants about lack of facilities etc, I take my lead from my wonderfully forthright SIL and say "So what are YOU going to do about it ?" or even better "If things are so bad here why don't you leave?"

Oh yes and definitely get local PSCO ( arrange letters in appropriate order) or traffic warden.

Such people need firm handling and handling them isn't for the faint hearted but they can be controlled to some extent, if you're committed.

Easytoplant · 26/03/2026 06:17

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Easytoplant · 26/03/2026 06:19

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Blessedbethefruitloopss · 26/03/2026 06:27

Take pics of the car and post on the local page anonymously. That worked at our school.

MrsToothyBitch · 26/03/2026 06:32

PCSO + local area fb page for the parking.

Rinse & repeat "the way to make a difference to the things you don't like is to join the pta, as we've been saying, Jessica". You should all remind her that people repeatedly say that if you want something done, ask a busy person- and that she won't get anywhere if she doesn't embody the change she wishes to see, a la Gandhi. As she'll probably refuse, use her own words to point her as a gobby lazy bones.

Toddlerteaplease · 26/03/2026 06:44

She’s not worth space in your head.

franklymydearscarlett · 26/03/2026 09:25

Sartre · 25/03/2026 19:58

My older DC went to a bit of a rough primary and some parents would stand smoking at the gate meaning you had to walk through a cloud of smoke, I had a baby at the time. I complained to the head teacher who said he hated it too but couldn’t do anything because it wasn’t school property (he could have had a word or put it in the newsletter but whatever!). So I basically complained to OFSTED and a few weeks later a big no smoking sign went up on the gates and the parents stopped.

Well done!!

Swiftie1878 · 26/03/2026 09:43

She sounds really annoying but, frankly, it’s none of your business.
Eye roll; move on.

RudolphTheReindeer · 26/03/2026 10:33

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Or they were also sick of her moaning so suggested she joins to help raise money to improve things. It's the PTA, anyone can join, it's not some exclusive club you need an invitation too.

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