14 month old doesn’t sleep

[YourBlueGuide]

I’ve got a 14 month old baby who just does not sleep and I’m at my wits end of it now.
She wakes up every two hours maximum she’s never slept any more than two hours in one go some nights she’ll go down and be awake every 20 minutes and it’s affecting my health now what can I do? Unfortunately as she doesn’t have her own room as I’ve only got a one bedroom flat I don’t know if that is the issue. I doubt it though. I also don’t know if the answer is the fact that she doesn’t have a strict nap routine during the day and I’m gonna sound really bad for this. I haven’t got the time for it. I work full-time. I when I’ve got a day off work I’ve got things to do. I can’t always sit indoors and wait for her to have a nap. We would never leave the house. For example we get up at seven and by the time we’ve had our breakfast with washed and dressed it’s 10 o’clock she has a nap and then by the time she’s woken up from a nap it’s lunchtime and then you have lunch and then it’s 1 o’clock by the time you’re leaving the house for the day I just wouldn’t ever get anything done so unfortunately we just have to leave the house at 10 o’clock and she just has to sleep along the way and sometimes that is only a 10 minute cat nap in the back of the car before she’s woken up to get out of the car is that the problem here that she’s got no strict nap routine but then when she’s at nursery she doesn’t really sleep in a routine it’s just anything I can do to help me sleep more than just two hours in one go and then when she wakes up after two hours she’s very difficult to settle back to sleep again and after about 9 pm at night it’s really hard to settle back to sleep and keep her asleep and that’s when we start seeing her waking up every 45 minutes I’m desperate for her to just do at least four hours in one guy would be so nice

@YourBlueGuide I remember one holiday that my 18 month old who usually always slept through was constantly waking in the night, by night 3, we moved his cot out of the hotel bedroom and into the bathroom. He slept soundly all night without us in the room. That’s where he slept all holiday!

I also used to sit at home until lunchtime and wait for the 3 hour morning nap to finish. It worked out as having 2 hours out before back to cook dinner. Nightmare really but it didn’t last forever. I think children can regulate better once they are fully rested.

I feel your pain. My DS was like that, and we tried EVERYTHING. In the end, he hit his second birthday and it was like a switch. Has slept from 7-7ish ever since. Nothing changed, we didn’t do anything different.

Hang in there OP, it really is brutal.

At 14 months both of mine were at nursery, they were having one solid nap a day - anywhere between 2-3 hours but awake by 3, bed by 7 as they were shattered. We still had night wakenings but would just get into bed with us and go straight back to sleep after some milk. I’d personally try having a more consistent nap time, it’s a pain but doesn’t last forever. Is she wanting milk at night or has she weaned off?

I don’t think a 14 month old would need to nap after only 3 hours awake? I’d be really trying for a 1 nap day, then you can go out in the morning,
come back for nap; then afternoon is free. Sounds like she is really undertired for the night so can’t stay asleep. Nurseries usually do 1 nap a day after lunch for that age. I don’t think you need a strict routine but if you can get her on 1 nap she’ll be knackered by bedtime and hopefully sleep longer: my daughter sleep has improved a lot since moving to 1 nap.

Where is she while you are working? I say that because both of mine only got into a routine for napping once at nursery, I agree it’s hard to stick to when you are trying to get errands done on a day off so I don’t bother either. FWIW I also agree with PP who suggests one nap a day (again- because of nursery) mine were both on one nap by 9 months and it helped sleep a lot.
Neither of mine slept through the night until they were in their own room so it is definitely worth trying - can you move her cot into the living room?
where is her dad? When mine were having terrible sleep my DH would sleep in another room, so he could at least get them up in the morning and I could have an hour or two before work. Is that an option?
just to add, some children just do not sleep well and you have my sympathy if that’s the case, but given you are posting here I assume you are also looking for advice!

@rose88xx she is at nursery when I go to work