To have sen demand letter to ex?

[parsleydog]

Not me but my friend.

Recently broke up with someone with whom he had been on holiday. He paid for most stuff (hotels, most meals, trips, activities, hire car, one of her flights etc) on the trip.

She agreed, before they broke up, to split accommodation costs and some food costs and said she’d pay him back at the end of the trip.

Then they split up pretty much straight away, got home, he sent her a message breaking down the costs and showing her what she owed (£1.2k). She then sent him a message 2 days later splitting up with him, and she hasn’t paid him back. He’s followed up and she’s ignored him.

He’s now sent her a letter (10 days after they got home) threatening court action if she doesn’t pay him what she promised. But now he feels bad and like he shouldn’t has done this.

Was he being unreasonable to have sent the letter?

I said I’d consult Mumsnet….

Court action? How much are we talking about ?

That depends upon how much he needs the money back I guess. Is there anything in writing that the money is owed to your friend?

Sorry forgot amount! £1.2k (edited now to add this)

Yep - WhatsApp messages where she agrees to split.

He does need the money - he’s not going to starve without it but it’s not like he won’t notice it. She actually has a much better paid job than him.

Unless your friend is a complete creep who has done something to lead to the breakup, seems fair to me to try and recover costs.

If she agreed to pay it back and is now backpedaling she's a dick.

He’s really not!

I used this exact description

Agreed. Shocking behaviour to just dump because she doesn’t want to pay

Right? Tbh it was clear it was over before she sent the “official” break up text but to my mind very shit that she sent that after he asked her to pay him back.

“Court action”. That’s completely daft. A couple of legal letters would cost more than the £1.2k. He needs to take this as a lesson that you don’t lend money you can’t afford to lose. He’s sent his toothless letter now and if she doesn’t pay or respond then he takes it on the chin and chalks it up to experience. If he keeps persisting she might claim he’s harassing her, then it’s a whole other thing. Just let this one go. She is a dick for not keeping up her end, but people are dicks and he knows this now.

If there's no proof in writing she said she'd pay it back by a certain time then either the debt isn't enforceable at all or she has until basically forever to pay it back if no terms agreed.

So good luck taking her to court. I mean I don't condone her not paying but I just think it might not be worth the hassle.

Agreed. He wouldn’t need a lawyer though; he could go to small claims court. But agree it’s better to let it go.

Good point; didn’t realise that

Small claims court isn’t a huge amount of hassle. I’ve used the process twice and both times the people I was claiming against paid up a few days before the court case. I think they thought I wouldn’t go through with it and that I was making idle threats. To me, £1.2k would definitely be worth it.

If this was me sorry if this sounds wrong but an ex who is just been on holiday with wouldn’t be able to contact me if we got back and broke up they’d be blocked, gone, zero, dead to me. If you go on holiday together and break up straight after surely something bad happened or you’d have split up amicably before you went no? I wouldn’t be able to answer a message, my phone would be of no use to you.

Where do you get your legal advice from? The small claims court is cheap and easy to use...you fill in an online form. Even a fully trained solicitor would be worth using for £1200 and the evidence the guy has

He would need a solicitor for this. The WhatsApps don’t sound strong enough to constitute a contract, so he’d be daft not to get a solicitor to help him make a case, especially if she gets a solicitor too. Plus mediation would also be required. So no, not worth it except to make a point as this isn’t a slam dunk win.

Small claims process is the way forward. Designed to not require a solicitor and relatively affordable and simple. The WhatsApp messages should be proof enough if they are clear on what she has agreed to pay. Don’t be put off, for £1.2k I would.
www.citizensadvice.org.uk/law-and-courts/legal-system/small-claims/

I’ve used small claims twice and the forms were quick and easy. IANAL but I feel like the WhatsApp messages would be enough proof. Definitely worth a shot for £1.2k!

(Both times, the other person paid up just before court. They’re banking on it being a bluff, but why should your friend be out of pocket?!

did He book and pay for the holiday on the basis she would pay him back or did he just ask her to pay as the relationship was souring
why did she dump him?
I suppose she should honour the agreements and pay him back but a guy chasing payment would give me the ick (I would still pay and then dump)

This, we did small claims against a family member who owed us a little over £1400 we had WhatsApp messages as proof. We won

She is a dick but I don't think you could prove in court that it was owed. He needs to chalk it up to bad experience and move on.

This is exactly right. WhatsApps are able to be used in court but only if they show the intent of a contract such as price, scope and payment terms, which is unclear here.
Imagine I go on a date with someone, in a text I say “sure, I’ll pay half” and he then takes me to a fine dining restaurant, orders the most expensive things on the menu with wine pairings for each course, then takes me to small claims when I refuse to pay half.
It doesn’t work like that.
Now if he’s said, “We’ll go to x place, you’ll need to pay half, it will cost £x and I will need you to pay on the night” and I’ve agreed to those terms then that’s a different story.
Anything else sets a dangerous precedent, not just for singles who might inadvertently end up in court for agreeing to buy the coffees on the next date but then decide they don’t actually want to see that person again, but imagine in business you ask someone to come and clean your windows, person shows up, cleans your windows, then goes that’s £17k excluding VAT. The CONTRACT protects both parties as important details like cost, scope of the work and payment terms are mutually agreed and become a contract, so it’s actually the contract that courts enforce, not just agreement to something.

So WhatsApps of themselves are not necessarily enough unless they meet this requirement, and if in any doubt a solicitor should be consulted, which is when it does get costly.
Or. You get burned and you learn your lesson.

For the sake of a small claims court fee I'd have a go

Nothing to lose and £1200 to gain