AIBU for feeling self-conscious and wanting to cover up during sex?

[ThatFirmSnail]

I’m 39 and have been with my DH (40M) for 12 years. We have 2 boys ages 4 and 2. I’ve had two natural births and breastfed both times, and I’m currently expecting our third. Our sex life is still regular, and I enjoy it, but I’ve been really struggling with my body and confidence lately.

Before pregnancies I had B cups. Now my boobs are much bigger for breastfeeding, and I just haven’t got used to them despite having two kids. During sex I often feel self-conscious and sometimes even disgusting. I tend to wear a t-shirt because I don’t really want him to look at my boobs, and sometimes I find it hard to accept compliments from DH. DH is very supportive but I feel guilty for not having the same confidence I had before.I avoid looking at myself in the mirror unless I have to.

I love my children and I know this is probably just a phase I have to get used to, but it’s really weighing on me. I think I’m just overwhelmed constantly being touched by my children, I’ve stopped breast feeding our youngest but he’s still so attached and DH is great so supportive I don’t know why I feel like this. I have a supportive husband, we gave the children we wanted so bad yet I’m not happy.

How do you cope with body changes after pregnancy and breastfeeding? I think for me I haven’t had the chance to accept the changes.

We have a friends wedding in a few weeks and I’m stressed about what to wear that doesn’t show my boobs, I’m even considering just staying home and DH can go to the wedding.

I don't have a solution, but you're not alone. I feel the same way. We have a still breastfeeding toddler and I'm pregnant with our second.

It was an issue before pregnancy/breastfeeding tbh, but I'm even worse now. I hate getting on top, unless it's dark or I'm wearing a t-shirt. My husband is very supportive too, but I really struggle to believe him when he compliments me.

i am sure your husband loves you and loves your body the way it is now . Bodies change , I am sure your husbands has too and it seems you still love him as he was when you were first married .

My husband I have just reached our sixties . Yes we have changed so much since we were in our twenties, but the attraction is still
there .

Ita also normal to go through phases of feeling your body is not yours especially after breastfeeding and giving birth. Perhaps this is part of it . Maybe at the moment you need to recapture that intimacy slowly with non sexual touch and let natural feelings return slowly ,