To feel burned out

[MyDeftStork]

We had our first child, booked a wedding with a 7 month lead time, I went back to work during this time and we’ve also been doing our house up throughout.

My husband wants a second child but I can’t even see how we would cope… he works two weeks away per month and at least one weekend he’s home we visit his parents or they visit us, we also have 10 weddings this year, I’m bridesmaid for three and there are of course multiple hen dos.

I think the issue is I’m an introvert, I take every decision very seriously (and with all this going on - there are a lot of them to be made!) and I need a lot of sleep. My daughter is also constantly ill from nursery so sleep isn’t optimum and I keep getting ill but working through it most of the time due to guilt.

i constantly feel a few steps behind, exhausted and stressed.

I guess this is a bit of a rant but also a question - how are other mums coping, especially those of you with more than one?!?

I could not cope with that. I cope with two children by having a senior and fairly flexible job, a decent gap in ages between the kids, a very involved and present husband, rare visits with in-laws and not attending 10 weddings!

the nursery illnesses will get better (she and you will develop extremely robust immune systems). But I seriously advise against taking on more right now.

if you decide you do want a second, maybe wait a few years.

I'm exhausted just reading that to be honest! I wouldn't even think about adding another baby to the mix, it's easy for husbands to say let's have another baby when they don't have to do the whole pregnancy and birth and recovery and can swan off to work leaving you at home with a toddler and a new baby! Wait until you feel the time is right - for you!

You're allowed to say no to things

Yeah it’s a hard no. Fine for him as he’s away half the blinking time!

If you do have a second, you’ll be on your knees and he’ll complain you’re not there for him or other such bollocks.

YANBU

10 weddings?

Whats wrong with you

Deinvite yourself to at least half of them.

10 weddings and bridesmaid for three is crazy, hopefully just an anomaly and next year will be easier? I would 100% NOT be going to 10 hen dos AND 10 weddings, that's something almost every other week.