AIBU to feel upset partner did nothing for me on Mother's Day?

SpiritAdder · 15/03/2026 19:02

Yanbu to be disappointed, upset, angry. All your feelings are valid.
Is this usual? You’ve been a mother 6 years. Is it like this every year or is this the first time?

Tacohill · 15/03/2026 19:05

A card is less than £1.
He could have even helped DD to make one.

There is no excuse for him to be this selfish and it says a lot about how much he appreciates you as a mother.

It sounds like you chose to cook dinner.
I would have told him to cook instead and so you can’t be upset about this but you’re definitely justified about being upset that he made no effort.

Firtreefiona · 15/03/2026 19:14

you aren’t his mother OP.

Holdinguphalfthesky · 15/03/2026 19:22

Firtreefiona · 15/03/2026 19:14

you aren’t his mother OP.

But she is the mother of his young child, who would need a bit of help to mark Mother’s Day. So yeah, he did have a responsibility to help his daughter make sure that the day is special for her mum, even in a small way.

Whaleandsnail6 · 15/03/2026 19:22

Yanbu to be hurt, he could have got dd to make a card at the very least

You are very unreasonable to cook yourself...why not put it back onto him and ask what was for dinner? And if he hadn't sorted anything, tell him you aren't since its mothers day so he has to produce some sort of food for you all.

Put it onto him and don't be a martyr by just doing it yourself

sunsetsites · 15/03/2026 19:30

Firtreefiona · 15/03/2026 19:14

you aren’t his mother OP.

The mother of his child is a pretty prominent role in his life and it’s normal to acknowledge it on Mother’s Day.

sunsetsites · 15/03/2026 19:31

OP I’m going to go out on a limb and assume this isn’t the only time your partner’s actions have been lacking.
Why did you then make dinner for everyone?
Why not tell him he could make dinner since it was Mother’s Day and you were going to read/ have a bath/ watch a movie with your daughter?

Cel77 · 15/03/2026 19:46

Not nice at all from him. No emotional intelligence or maybe worse...Is he quite thoughful, or even just nice, otherwise?

Fascinate · 15/03/2026 19:52

You spent the day cooking?

Im sorry but it appears that you have either been taught to ignore your rights/feelings or you have abdicated them.

Life will not change until you stand up and advocate for yourself. If you feel unsafe, then make plans to remove yourself from the situation.

Either way, do not accept this

caringcarer · 15/03/2026 19:59

He should have either taken DD to choose a card or help her make one. I bet she'd have loved to do stickers on a card for you OP. He could have spent £10 less on his own Mum and let DH choose you some flowers or chocolates. What did he do the previous 5 years? Does he have form for this? Don't get him a Father's day gift or card. He needs to know what it feels like to be forgotten.

JetFlight · 15/03/2026 20:04

Is he like this with your birthday? Christmas? Have you spoken to him?
Next year, do something with Dd yourself. Get some breakfast stuff in, bake a cake, go get some daffodils with her, go out for coffee. Let her know that you matter so when she’s older, she’ll understand that.

JackGrealishsCalves · 15/03/2026 20:05

As your dd is only 6 I would have expected him to help her make a card or take her to the shops for one.
I actually feel sorry more for the kids in this scenario, imagine going into school tomorrow and her friends all saying what they did for mothers day and she hadn't done anything (not her fault).

Bringemout · 15/03/2026 20:11

Firtreefiona · 15/03/2026 19:14

you aren’t his mother OP.

I’m not my husband mother either but because mine is small DH told her it was mothers day, suggested she make a card and took her to the shops to buy me a present. And because he’s a nice person I’m snuggled up with a glass of wine while he’s doing the bedtime routine (which tbf he does every night, he just made sure I had a glass of wine this time).

OP YANBU at all, even just helping your DD to make a card would have been something. Also mothers day is to spend with your mother, your MIL is not your child mother. Plan something with your DD next year, can be anything, a picnic etc. I’m sorry this was so disappointing for you, you can tell him straight that it made you unhappy.

FunnyOrca · 15/03/2026 20:17

I got a card and he said he would make dinner and didn’t. It’s my first Mother’s Day. After pretty much single parenting the last three weeks, I was hoping for a bit more than a card. Even just a bunch of flowers or a framed photo of baby or actually making dinner…

Mumsworkneverdone · 15/03/2026 20:22

Hi Op, I’m so sorry this sounds just so disappointing. Make sure you do nothing for Father’s Day when it comes

Endofyear · 15/03/2026 20:35

Why not speak up and say I'm not cooking today because it's Mother's Day so let's get a takeaway? Or say to him, when you go out can you take DD so she can get a Mother's Day card and some chocs or something? Don't be a martyr - unless you prioritise your own needs, how can you expect anyone else too?

4wardlooking · 15/03/2026 23:39

mumof1and3dogs · 15/03/2026 19:00

AIBU - Its mother's day today and I received nothing from my partner from my 6 year old daughter, not even a card. I no its just another day and stuff and to some it means nothing... and its not about the gifts
I totally get money is tight and we have priority bills to pay but he bought his mum £50 worth if bits. I paid for my own mums.
I feel really angry obviously not with my daughter but with my partner, I even cooked dinner he never offered to order in or anything so I have spent most of the day in the kitchen cooking a roast dinner. dont get me wrong I didnt have to but then we would have had nothing for dinner.
I spent most of the day on my own because he took our daughter to his mums. I see my mum yesterday.
I just feel so under appreciated not even a "happy mothers day"

Absolute w**ker!

4wardlooking · 15/03/2026 23:39

Mumsworkneverdone · 15/03/2026 20:22

Hi Op, I’m so sorry this sounds just so disappointing. Make sure you do nothing for Father’s Day when it comes

Agreed!

4wardlooking · 15/03/2026 23:42

@mumof1and3dogs sounds like he’s still a mummy’s boy and hasn’t got his head round having his own family unit yet.

He needs to be told where his priorities should lay.

What a tool!

greenteaandlimes · 15/03/2026 23:44

What kind of beastly shit-lord have you partnered up with OP?

PinkyFlamingo · 16/03/2026 00:10

Why are you with someone so thoughtless?

SleepingStandingUp · 16/03/2026 00:16

What happened last year?

fretaway · 16/03/2026 00:19

Mumsworkneverdone · 15/03/2026 20:22

Hi Op, I’m so sorry this sounds just so disappointing. Make sure you do nothing for Father’s Day when it comes

Absolutely this! Go treat yourself OP - cake and coffee, buy yourself something nice, whatever floats your boat

SleepingStandingUp · 16/03/2026 00:19

Firtreefiona · 15/03/2026 19:14

you aren’t his mother OP.

No, he's the father of a young child who can't independently pop to the shop and get her mother a gift for mother's day. He's the partner of a woman who he has a child with. He knows it's Mother's day. He knows mothers day is for celebrating mother's. He's celebrating his own mother but cba to help his daughter do the same. Even if he has absolute contempt for op, he's also letting his daughter down. My boys are y, they know what mothers day is, they'd have been gutted to have spent today away from me. .

OP check her school bag? Did she make a card ay school?